Go home!
I wake up this morning an outlaw, a misdemean* with a rotten attitude and matching sneer. Parents pull their children six feet away from me when I saunter down the street. Grown grandchildren pull their grandparents even further.
A real tough, which is yet another silver lining to this Coronavirus Apocalypse where totalitarianism reigns and surfers must learn to fight The Man once again.
The Man and the VAL.
But do you think it’s possible that this moment right here is the moment surf localism takes root once more? That our own grandchildren will someday sit on our knees while we regale them with stories about once more becoming bad?
I hope.
I trust.
David Lee Scales and I chatted with Ron Shine of Boardporn fame, from bad Rockaway Beach in New York, about surfers hardening up. About surfers flexing dormant muscles and shouting at interlopers then David Lee and I peeled away and chatted other various nonsense.
Our best show yet?
No.
We did it remotely and will never do such again.
Shame on us.
*If a felon commits felonies I assume that a misdemean commits misdemeanors.
Commented on Disqus? Log out, tap the Disqus button, and your old name and comments come back. The box is ours.
Your comments are still here. Every one of them.
Twelve years of BeachGrit comments came across from Disqus. Connect and we will show you how many are yours. We get your username, nothing else.
Connect Disqus to reveal.
Define local, who polices it? Self defined locals who have put themselves up on a pedestal because they never left home and became inward looking, xenophobic rednecks?
No-one owns the sea or waves and anyone who tries to threaten violence on those perceived as ‘the other’ will just get arrested.
It doesn’t work and try-hard surf nazis can get fucked haha. Localism is dead.
Having grown up surfing, I find it pathetic that this “locals only” mentality exist to this day. I never chased off fellow surfers regardless of their skill set or anything else. I was always more than happy to share my local spot because surfing should be a brotherhood, not a selfish “locals only” community of punks who just need a good ass whippin.
surfers are shtupid. Well not all of them, but a lot of them.
People are shtupid.
And localism is pretty much doomed in the Internet age anyway.
Did you know that the invention of the surf leash pretty much catalyzed localism?
it did.
My beach
My wave
Go home
My race is humen, my home is earth
Surfers are arrogant narcists you think its only you that you have rights to the oceans . Reason I gave this surfing up to ho windsurfing too many depressed angry nasties in the water and car parks
Misdemeanor was a cool song by The Sylvers – a level below the Jacksons.
https://www.youtube.com/wat…
Charmaine Sylvers was my roommate in Malibu for a while.
Her daughter was a good cook.
It’s a wonder she didn’t poison you
Ha, just jokes legend!!
She was fairly hot, too. Leon was/ is one of the best funk/ r and b bassists, bar none.
Misdemean…I like it
I officially annoint myself MASTER
(he who commits regular acts of masterbation)
I have watched a ton of surf videos the past 3 weeks, is Anonymous Rangi Ormand? I’ll understand if you can’t answer, being a gangster probably means you’d have to kill me.
Of course not but said anonymous was probably heavily influenced by Guaranga in his grom days…
I like his style, he’s upright, loose and spontaneous like a skateboarder
Some nonviolent form of localism needs to return. One city still open to surfing was good and beyond packed this week. However, one-half to three-quarters of the pack depending on the spot were VALs and other kooks–not ok surfers who are kooks compared to a local semi-pro–I mean absolute beginners to “can barely make a semi-steep drop and go down the line” surfers. When did these surfers determine they were entitled to paddle out at prime spots and aggressively hassle for waves? Or are their actions unintentional due to their cluelessness?
How the fuck can absolute beginners aggressively hassle for waves? ‘Tis a logical fallacy sir.
It’s because no one is scared anymore.
Unfortunately, it is not. Like a decent surfer, they try to paddle inside you for position. Of course, they often get too deep because they are absolutely clueless, but they still screw up the natural order. Not to mention when they blow every semi-difficult drop, they–and their oversized craft–are often in way.
The smell of lost youth is strong with this one.
(sigh) do I have to tell everyone how to do everything.
here are some simple steps for you just as in the invaluable safety lessons above.
first: become a really good surfer, like good.
second: when absolute beginner attempts to out position you, freeze said beginner with a Look, then catch the wave and surf it with your magnificent surfing skills.
third: paddle out and directly inside said beginner, or even better, down the beach a little way and get another excellent wave.
This stuff sure seemed all sorted when we were groms. You simply knew your place in the lineup. What happened?
I dunno, nothing really from my perspective. Everything seems as if it works the same as ever but less violent. People have always done clumsy shit in the water, people have also always managed to work together and around each other. The much reviled VAL seems to me to be a very humble person who if he or she isn’t aware at first, rapidly becomes aware of what’s up and is prepared to step aside and learn what they can. Still the lamest variety of surfer is the mid-30s man who isn’t very good, but thinks he is, and tries to be Alpha. This was true 30 years ago and it’s true now.
Surfers became more arrogant and narcistic than any other ocean sports men
Narcist weirdo
Is your daughter inspired to see you put all the French Revolution knowledge gleaned when you endangered her life last month, to work with the fascists in Cardiff?
Chas “Ms. Demean’r” Smith
He be trowing shade !