Three-time world champ Tom Curren in game of White Face. | Photo: Andrew Kidman

Listen: Soul Queen Andrew Kidman and Lit-God Longtom hit the WSL’s “utter bastardisation” of surfing, the murder of surfing’s greatest underdog and the “value of freedom for surfers, right now!”

Who got killed in his bath on the North Shore? The mystifying behaviour of the WSL! The joy of early infection! And why three-time world champ Tom Curren likes to play "White Face"!

Today on Dirty Water, which is episode three, we’ve got two special guests, the creator of game-changing surf film Litmus in 1996, its 2019 sequel Beyond Litmus, the surfboard design documentary On the Edge of a Dream where an impossible to ride board is filmed ruining the live of myriad surfers, the queen of soul Andrew Kidman.

Kidman also made the films Single, with Stephanie Gilmore, Glass Love, and Spirit of Akasha, a sort of sequel to Morning of the Earth, which premiered at the Sydney Opera House.

He’s also made myriad album with The Windy Hills and The Val Dusty Experiment,  shapes boards, takes photographs, writes books and produces a tabloid-sized, although far from tabloid in nature, newsprint surf magazine.

The Surfers Journal describes Kidman as “our equivalent of a roving medieval ascetic, spreading his high-consciousness idealism to the four corners of the surfing world.”

But don’t think Kidman, who is a former Australian champion surfer, is gonna put you to sleep.

He works from the angle that he has to produce work that offsets the WSL’s “utter bastardisation” of his beloved sport.

The second guest is BeachGrit’s star writer, Lennox Heads’ own Anton Chekhov, Steve “Longtom” Shearer.

There’s a little synergy there.

Both live around Byron Bay, Longtom in a joint so close to Lennox Point you could toss a rock out the window and hit an inflatable mat rider; Kidman on a farm near Mount Warning, in a little hamlet thirty minutes drive inland from Murferville, that Vanity Fair-profiled haven of narcissism and clandestine infighting.

Chas is here, too, begging to be infected with COVID-19 and, me, as always, unable to shake off the dust of delusion.

Listen etc. It ain’t too long.

(Buy DVD/digital download/hard-cover book of Beyond Litmus, here.)

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Low wide stinkbug stance
Low wide stinkbug stance
6 years ago

Derek got his brains fucked out by an Israeli bird when he was in Sri Lanka and now he’s gone loopy.

Shroom
Shroom
6 years ago

I thought LT would sound a lot less like my weed dealer..hang on a sec

Ando
Ando
6 years ago

Yeah nah, I’m not sure what the point of this was.

Get someone on there not only with a list of topics but insightful questions as well, then staunchly direct traffic to get something resembling an outcome or at least a defined opinion.

No wonder Steve was asking several times with total sincerity “is this it, is this not a practice run?”

frank
frank
6 years ago

Curren totally nails the supercilious expression that Marcel Marceau had on his real face under the make up. Genius!

Mads Naeraa
Mads Naeraa
6 years ago
Reply to  frank

It’s a great photo.

Bush
Bush
6 years ago

Don’t be humble boys this is good. Keep it honest keep it dirty. I like listening to the grit also Don’t get me wrong but good to hear Australian POV even if it is just as subtle as sidewalk versus footpath.

SSD
SSD
6 years ago

DJ Premier vs RZA DJ battle on IG live was the best thing on this whole quarantine. That shit was fire!!

@surfads
@surfads
6 years ago
Reply to  SSD

Oh shit, serious? There’s been some quality stuff of late. Tell you who is worth his weight in IG story gold: Freddie Gibbs

SSD
SSD
6 years ago
Reply to  @surfads

They played all kinds of classics plus back stories. Said they would do pt2 soon. Primo has it in his stories right now if you want to check it out. Awesome moment in hip hop!
I’ll check out Freddie Gibbs, thx!!

Waterproof Polo
Waterproof Polo
6 years ago
Reply to  @surfads

Lilduval has been keeping me well entertained.

SSD
SSD
6 years ago
Reply to  @surfads
NEGATRON
NEGATRON
6 years ago
Reply to  SSD

You seen this one?
https://www.youtube.com/wat…

SSD
SSD
6 years ago
Reply to  NEGATRON

Not yet but looks outstanding! Good tip!

Bush
Bush
6 years ago
Reply to  SSD

Half way through it now so so good. Wondering why everyone loving it so much? Two legends spinning dope tunes.

SSD
SSD
6 years ago
Reply to  Bush

Totally! I had it on my Pioneer over ear headphones and it was awesome!!

Bush
Bush
6 years ago
Reply to  SSD

I guess America and New York needing unity right now any way they can get it.

SSD
SSD
6 years ago
Reply to  Bush

Definitely! Not just from the pandemic either. The feed had like 800,000+ people viewing at one point. Legends of hip hop were on the comment roll also. It was a very positive thing

astro
astro
6 years ago

Here Jen, lemme give you the skinny on dirty water.
Get 4 or 5 guys and sometimes a token woman (oh wait that’s Drek) and bullshit about fuckall.
That’s the script.
Hey, I’m not knocking it. It’s as relevant as anything else out there and certainly a little bit better than the Slater Croons Channel.

SlickSaintNik
SlickSaintNik
6 years ago

For your next episode, you should interview DLS and ask him after years of faithful recordings, making essentially no money, how it feels to be ripped off by all of your guests at the point at which you have finally built a legitimate business.

Karl Von Fanningstadt
Karl Von Fanningstadt
6 years ago

LT, try talking out of your butt a little more, like Chas does. Never seen any of the top 5 movies you guys mentioned. I’ve already said my top 5 surf movies, but here are my Top 5 any other kind of movie recommendations:
T-5. Labyrinth – David Bowie + Muppets! Scared me growing up.
Airborne – “Don’t know what I want to be when I grow up. Don’t care. Just as long as I live near the beach and don’t have to wear a tie. Then I’ll be stylin’.”
4. Eight Men Out – Slanted B.S. All the Black Sox who got busted were in on the fix, including Shoeless Joe.
3. Shrek 2 – Eddie Murphy as Donkey is hilarious.
2. Napoleon Dynamite – Realest movie I’ve ever seen.
1. King Harold: Fact or Fiction (Timeline World History) – Can find it on YouTube.

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago

Hers mine as if anyone gives a shit
5. True Romance
4. Bad boy bubby
3.chopper
4.white chicks
5 beavis and butt head the movie.

Antipodes
Antipodes
6 years ago

Bad Boy Bubby is an absolute classic.

@surfads
@surfads
6 years ago
Reply to  Antipodes

Naughty cat!

Low wide stinkbug stance
Low wide stinkbug stance
6 years ago
Reply to  Antipodes

Why don’t ya get off the road ya fucken dickhead!

Shore pound
Shore pound
6 years ago

White Chicks is a national treasure

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago
Reply to  Shore pound

So good!
I actually still laugh out loud at bevis and butt

SSD
SSD
6 years ago

5:serpent and the rainbow
4: Jacobs ladder
3:angel heart
2:rivers edge
1:romancing the stone

Low wide stinkbug stance
Low wide stinkbug stance
6 years ago
Reply to  SSD

Jacob’s ladder? The Vietnam flic where they got drugs administered to them? Got me depressed.

SSD
SSD
6 years ago

Exactly. Starring Tim Robbins. What a downer, huh? All four I listed are like that to me and definitely not my favorites

Lemon Next to the Pie
Lemon Next to the Pie
6 years ago

Alright. Coolum makes the news. 4573: Represent Mofos.

https://twitter.com/TitusOR…

@surfads
@surfads
6 years ago

V entertaining. I feel like Derek is Daryl Somers, Chas is Ozzie the Ostrich and Jazzy P is the disembodied John Blackman occasional v/o

Antipodes
Antipodes
6 years ago
Reply to  @surfads

“Dirty Water” – We Don’t Script This.

Antipodes
Antipodes
6 years ago

Loose, shambolic, entertaining. Keep ‘em coming.
Also I’ll kick in for the legal fees if you throw up a link to sea of darkness.

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago
Reply to  Antipodes

It’s had such a hype.
I bet its shit.

@surfads
@surfads
6 years ago

I’ve got it. As derek said last week great subject matter but poorly directed / executed. Absolutely still good viewing tho

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago
Reply to  @surfads

You can post it here with no dramas.
If anyone still can read books,
This is great https://uploads.disquscdn.c…

Antipodes
Antipodes
6 years ago

I’m baffled by people taking drugs in Bali. Sure there’s plenty of clubs, but fuck the consequences of getting caught are crazy.

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago
Reply to  Antipodes

Brazzoz are loco.
It’s all about Brazilian surfers

Hippy
Hippy
6 years ago

You ever read Thai Stick by Peter MacGuire, Bexy?

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago
Reply to  Hippy

I’ve just downloaded a sample.

Low wide stinkbug stance
Low wide stinkbug stance
6 years ago

She wrote one about Brasilian “surfers” after that which was pretty cool. “I loved fucking her so much, I almost remember her name!”

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago

Yeah, read that too
Based in Floripa rather than Bali.
Good storyteller.
Those guys lived a life!!

Low wide stinkbug stance
Low wide stinkbug stance
6 years ago

Yeah, they were more drug dealers that liked to surf than surfers who liked to deal. Shit what happened to the guy they sent to Bali.
Made me want to be a Brasilian playboy though.

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago

Marco
Fuken hell!!
That’s a movie!!

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago
Reply to  @surfads

Best surf flick I’ve ever seen.
Fuken legends!!!
Brilliant!!!!

Waterproof Polo
Waterproof Polo
6 years ago

Nah it’s good

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago

I’ve never enjoyed a surf flick more than that one

NEGATRON
NEGATRON
6 years ago
Reply to  Antipodes

I think I made a song and dance last year about sending it to afew people… never got around to it but this ones legit, linked and seeding.
https://www.pirate-bay.net/…

Waterproof Polo
Waterproof Polo
6 years ago
Reply to  NEGATRON

That’s where I got my version. Gotta love good old fashioned piracy.

Waterproof Polo
Waterproof Polo
6 years ago
Reply to  Antipodes

I’ve got an MP4 happy to share.. Figure a way and I’ll post it here happily. Fuck big surf.

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago

Upload to your YouTube channel then share in disqus
Then delete youtube
Disqus problem now.

Wowen Ilson
Wowen Ilson
6 years ago
Reply to  Antipodes
Antipodes
Antipodes
6 years ago
Reply to  Wowen Ilson

Thanks!!

Antipodes
Antipodes
6 years ago
Reply to  Wowen Ilson

Wow Mike Boyum sounded like a pretty weird intense dude. Also I can’t help but feel that Jeff Chitty got kinda sucked in and screwed over. The film does a good job of making being a drug smuggler look like a pretty sad fraught existence (apart from all the empty barrels).

Wowen Ilson
Wowen Ilson
6 years ago
Reply to  Antipodes

I takes a certain type of insanity (or stupidity) to deal with the constant paranoia. Especially in a place with draconian drug laws like Indo

Wowen Ilson
Wowen Ilson
6 years ago
Reply to  Wowen Ilson

Apparently this is a edited version. Has anyone seen the original? I wonder what, or who got cut

SectionSB
SectionSB
6 years ago
Reply to  Wowen Ilson

I saved to watch later. I thought billabong founder or one of the big companies had edited out all the drug stuff when it was finally released to whitewash their reputation?

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago
Reply to  Wowen Ilson

That was fuken great.
Loved every minute.
Mad cunts!!
Best surf film I’ve ever watched.

Antipodes
Antipodes
6 years ago

I got a kick out of the fact that Bill Murray went to g-land.

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago
Reply to  Antipodes

That musta been the connection for bill and Phil jarrett on a blow bender in Sydney.
In phils book.

Heysoos
Heysoos
6 years ago
Reply to  Wowen Ilson

you’re the best!

Wowen Ilson
Wowen Ilson
6 years ago
Reply to  Heysoos

Thanks, that actually means a lot. Coming from Heysoos.

astro
astro
6 years ago

The best thing about that was the intro and mercifully when it came, the outro.

longtom
longtom
6 years ago
Reply to  astro

I wanna re-match, I thought we were practising.
Chas was hilarious though.

astro
astro
6 years ago
Reply to  longtom

He should start a cake baking channel.

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago
Reply to  longtom

You shoulda stood up for Gmed Italo, etc, boring?
Been watching last years bells, chopes, jbay, its fuken epic!!!!
Fuken hell Kidman
, no contest for old men.

Antipodes
Antipodes
6 years ago
Reply to  longtom

I think you all need breathalysers to get to a similar level of buzz. As there sounded like a large continuum of states ranging from stone cold sober to Chas’s garrulous drunkenness.

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago
Reply to  astro

Fuk it was a nice change from Dave and his grooming habits

astro
astro
6 years ago

Yea, you’re right.
I spose it was kinda interesting to learn Andrew was conceived on Cottesloe Beach.
But yea, apart from that snippet not a lot else ….

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago
Reply to  astro

I loved it
Apart from the typically endless nostalgia you get from resin brained surf types

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago

That Andrew guy makes me wanna puke with his back in the day shit.
Can’t you find someone under 40 to talk shit with.
Jizzy pee will do.

Jazzy P
Jazzy P
6 years ago

But Masters say that no one develops original thought until after 40…

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago
Reply to  Jazzy P

I haven’t had an original thought since I was 40…

Jazzy P
Jazzy P
6 years ago

I now feel like a horse looking into open pastures for the first time

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago
Reply to  Jazzy P

Giddyup!!

beachgrit
beachgrit
6 years ago

Even if we have to use pincers.

SSD
SSD
6 years ago

I find Dereks voice to be quite soothing. Especially with the big headphones on.
Edit: all the Australians actually

beachgrit
beachgrit
6 years ago
Reply to  SSD

You’re the first person to say such a kind thing.

SSD
SSD
6 years ago
Reply to  beachgrit

This episode is reeeeeeeeealy good

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago
Reply to  beachgrit

Second actually.
I believe I recently refered to your voice as a soothing mid pacific drawl…
Scott’s a good judge.

Derek Hynd's Missing Fins
Derek Hynd's Missing Fins
6 years ago

First time listening to one. Three past-middle aged Oz blokes staring at their navels. So far no coffee table has been jumped…edit: Chas just chimed in and punted on a chance to say what he really thinks about Chris Cote.

Chas Smith
Chas Smith
6 years ago

I love him! But….

joeys nosegard
joeys nosegard
6 years ago
Reply to  Chas Smith

so what is the pro surfing story you won’t talk about?

Chris Cote
Chris Cote
6 years ago
Reply to  Chas Smith

but what

Derek Hynd's Missing Fins
Derek Hynd's Missing Fins
6 years ago

Biggest hit of the WSL shutting down is we won’t get LT articles, at least at the rate and length if the season were running.


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