Listen: Wade Goodall talks “schlock Australian new wave cinema” that influenced Pentacoastal and hears, for first time, about surf mag that incinerated twenty-thousand copies of his first film Passion Pop!

Secrets brazenly revealed, a few laughs, not so many tears.

In today’s episode of Dirty Water, Charlie Smith and I three-way with Australian child prodigy, and star of Vans’ supercharged new full-length feature film, Wade Goodall.

Goodall, if you know a little surf history, was an air queen whose signature move, a shuvit in the skies, became the fulcrum upon which Billabong’s big 2006 feature, Passion Pop, pivoted.

Fourteen years later, Goodall, as lead, and filmmaker Shane Fletcher behind camera, both editing, created Pentacoastal.

A few caveats about today’s convo.

I’m fucking awful, screeching and interrupting, recounting shit stories like the time I interviewed Nick Cave about his film The Proposition; Goodall’s net connection via telephone is even flimsier than is the norm in Australia although we’ve tried to edit out most of the glitches and Chas heads off for a dinner party three-quarter of the way through.

Still, it’s free.

The conversation hits high points, I think, when Goodall talks about how Australian New Wave cinema, specifically the films Wake In Fright and Walkabout, that influenced the colour treatment and vibe of Pentacoastal; when he recounts the three times he’s snapped a leg and his joy when he hears that Australian surf mags used to incinerate two-thirds of the surf film DVDs that were supplied as cover mounts.

In Passion Pop’s case, twenty thousand burned out thirty k supplied.

And, a bonus: anyone who leaves a review on iTunes, good, bad, don’t care as long as it’s entertaining, will get a BeachGrit tailpad. All you gotta do is write the review, email us the link ([email protected]) and you’ll get a tailpad in some random colour.

(Available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Google Podcast, Stitcher, TuneIn + Alexa, iHeartRadio, Overcast, Pocket Cast, Castro, Castbox, Podcast Addict, Podchaser, Deezer and Listen Notes.)

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Witnessed: The greatest lineup fight in surfing’s long and sordid history!

Closed eyes, pursed lips.

The sun popped out, after a touch of morning grey, a light wind carrying with it the scent of sea, of good times waiting. I tossed my board in the back of the truck, coasted down the hill, parked, crossed the train tracks, crossed the street and beheld smaller than expected surf but still fun.

Shoulder-ish high on the sets.

It wasn’t particularly crowded, a sort of easy-going vibe that complemented the lack of critical sections nicely.

A kid was trying a few airs on a new-ish Christenson. A goat boater, fully bearded, vested with a CamelBak and helmet floated next to him.

A wave came and I watched as a chubby 30-something riding a round-nosed mini-mal dropped in on a ginger pre-teen riding a Wavestorm who was then dropped in on by a nondescript 40-something riding a yellowing gun.

When they all came up the pre-teen Stormtrooper flipped his board over and paddled back out. The chubby 30-something floated next to his mini-mal and started jawing at the nondescript 40-something, who floated next to his yellowing gun.

Their faces two feet apart.

They jawed for a handful of moments and then it happened.

The chubby 30-something splashed the nondescript 40-something in the face. The nondescript 40-something returned fire and splashed the chubby 30-something in the face. The chubby 30-something went back for seconds. The nondescript 40-something, not willing to concede, went back for seconds too.

And then it went full on. Both splashing each other in the face, from two feet apart for a solid 30 to 40 seconds.

No punches, no pushes, just rage-filled splashing for a weirdly long time.

I had never seen anything so positively wonderful. Both had their eyes closed, lips pursed, in order to keep that saltwater out. Heads tilted up, slightly.

The splashing reached critical mass where the hands couldn’t quite move fast enough to inflict much water damage plus with the eyes closed, heads tilted up, it was difficult for each to regularly hit the target but I did see the chubby 30-something gasp for air at some point.

And like that it was over.

I applauded and noted to those around me that we had just witnessed the greatest lineup fight in surfing’s long and sordid history.

They all agreed.


Happy surfer, pictured, returning to Costa Rica post-Covid.
Happy surfer, pictured, returning to Costa Rica post-Covid.

Bullish: Costa Rica predicts itself to be the “no. 1 surfing destination in the world after Covid-19!”

"Costa Rica is, today, the nation with the lowest mortality among the 10 favorite world destinations for to surf."

Have you already started to think about your next surf trip, when all this madness ends? Maybe a quick jaunt to Bali? Mexico? Oahu’s south shore? Lemoore, California? Travel will be brutal, I imagine, with once-friendly stewards and stewardesses dressing as extras from the film Contagion…

…zero food or drink, inflight magazines burned in giant barrels etc. but surfers gonna surf so where will you head?

The Central American nation of Costa Rica is predicting itself as the real winner, post-Covid, and let’s learn more about the surprisingly bullish claim. Let’s get our information directly from the Q Network.

Surfers who will travel again in search of waves and also consider the sanitary measures carried out by country during the coronavirus, will find that Costa Rica is, today, the nation with the lowest mortality among the 10 favorite world destinations for to surf.

With a mortality rate of just 1.08% during the contagion days so far, Costa Rica is today, the ninth country in the world that has best treated the health emergency, but the first among the 10 most visited destinations for surfing reasons.

Both National Geographic and other international media have repeatedly placed Costa Rica among the Top 10 of privileged countries to surf in their publications.

The other nine destinations are: Indonesia, Hawaii, the United States, Australia, South Africa, Spain, New Zealand, Brazil and Ireland.

However, Costa Rica, within that Top 10, is with the lowest mortality rate and with the least amount of infections in relation to the entire population.

Very wonderful, I suppose, though again… bullish. Less than two months ago, Costa Rican police officers appeared to shoot at surfers in the water, very much not wanting them at all.

Could it all be a trick?

A trap set where many surfers fly to Costa Rica with promises of disease-free waves and then get locked into work camps to slave and atone for the 1992 Gérard Depardieu vehicle 1492: Conquest of Paradise?

Possibly.


Shark season officially open in southern California as “larger than typical” Great Whites stalk the coast in heretofore unseen numbers!

"...there’s no good data showing sharks are actually dangerous."

If it ain’t one thing then it’s another, am I right? A few short months ago, in southern California, a microscopic virus, hand-crafted in Wuhan, shuttered beaches from San Diego up to Santa Barbara leaving surfers frustrated and sad.

Now, with beaches open and “silent spreaders” doing their work on the sand, Great Whites have arrived in both numbers and sizes that terrify or titillate, depending on profession and pastime of choice.

Per The Orange County Register:

Shark season in Southern California is officially here.

The spring season is when the water starts to warm and younger sharks start to hang around, spooking surfers and swimmers who share the ocean with the mysterious sea creature – but as experts learn more about the great white sharks, the more they are finding sharks, for the most part, don’t care much for humans.

“We have to remind people they need to share the waves with the locals,” Cal State Long Beach Shark Lab Director Chris Lowe said. “And the locals are really those sharks.”

Early season reports of juvenile shark hot spots have been reported mostly in Santa Barbara and Ventura – there haven’t been many further south so far this year, Lowe said. That is a drastic difference from the El Nino years that brought large groups of sharks to the South Bay, Long Beach, Huntington Beach and San Clemente a few seasons back.

A 12-foot White chased surfers out of the water in Coronado over the weekend, another in San Clemente and another still in Manhattan Beach, home of the World Surf League’s Chief Executive Erik “ELo” Logan who, thankfully, was not on his SUP but rather in Lemoore getting the monster tubes of his young life (more as the story develops).

I happened to be sailing home from Catalina, enjoying the setting sun, when I spotted a fin about halfway to Newport. Undeniably a White, moving slow, lazy, but the biggest fin I’d ever seen with my own two eyes.

Menacingly big.

Will there be hits?

According to Shark Lab, “…there’s no good data showing sharks are actually dangerous. We are getting data to suggest sharks and people are interacting more than we thought. Our data, so far … as long as people aren’t bothering them, they don’t seem to care.”

A relief, certainly.

But do you think sharks should engage in a re-branding now that they are not dangerous or do you think they enjoy their naughty cloak?

Much to ponder.


Kelly Slater (right) pictured with one of his fans.
Kelly Slater (right) pictured with one of his fans.

Kelly Slater’s legion of dedicated fans defend their hero, viciously turn on surf-lite tabloid BeachGrit: “Please, read more books, study a bit more, then write interesting articles!”

"What kind of undesirable human being are you?"

BeachGrit was torn asunder over the weekend as the world’s greatest surfer’s Kelly Slater’s fans rounded on the surf-lite tabloid mostly famous for a snarky wit that went out of fashion in 2015.

Or not famous at all, as pointed out by @perifreal. “Ummm. This is confusing. Who the fuck is beach grit? I know Slater, cause hes… Iconic.”

The rage grew out of an article titled WATCH: WORLD’S GREATEST SURFER KELLY SLATER DEALT HARSH PUNISHMENT FOR BLOCKING BEACHGRIT ON INSTAGRAM, HAS BOARD SNAPPED AND IS PUBLICLY SHAMED IN AUSTRALIA! and detailed how Slater had his board snapped on a big day just north Carroll-ville there near Sydney’s northern beaches likely because he blocked BeachGrit on Instagram.

The 11 x World Champion’s legion of supporters did not like the premise and let their fury burn hot on Instagram. A sampling:

@_mattbuchanan_: “Beach grit talking down on a man that has 500x’s the amount of talent, accomplishments, and respect than the social media influencer of this account…… just stop.”

@therealsurfbum: “Beach grit is fucking kook shit.”

@kevomick: “I wonder what tomorrow will bring?! More satirical bull shit shark articles perhaps? Or more bull shit pro surfer gossip click bait? Fuckin hacks sucking the teet of pro surfing but bashing the GOAT of surfing. Go home your drunk.”

@milnesurf: “Best surfer that ever lived got a standard board breakage in big waves. nothing unusual. What legend for going out in that swell. You seriously sound like a spoilt little girl. Unfollowed- probably lost a lot of followers didn’t ya.”

@t_plass: “You guys trying to be a bigger dumpster fire than the Biden campaign?”

@ericsnemesis: “Unfollowing ………………… Now… fucking worms.”

@savage: “Wowwwwww if you think this is a good move calling out our goat you’re fucked.”

@jemalexwill: “You’re hanging shit on the greatest sportsman of all time when your page is absolute rubbish, you sound like a bunch of petulant children.”

@augustovillaran: “Mommy ! ; Slater unfollow me ! I am going to make fun of him while he is struggling so people will like me!!! Seriously @beach_grit ??? What kind of undesirable human being are you? This is a fucking IG account . Grow up !”

@Yeah you muppets just lost another follower .. not funny, not witty not anything at all really. 100% would Bet, whoever is behind the keyboard on this one would line up in a heartbeat to ask his autograph.

@drists: “Horrible article. Lost my time reading bullshit. He’s a legend of surf. While surfing we are dealing with uncontrolled condition… This can happen with anyone else. Please, read more books, study a bit more, then write interesting articles.”

If only surf journalism was as easy as reading more books, studying a bit more then writing interesting articles.

Well, duly shamed, and also pleased that “our goat” has such a robust personal brand.

Aren’t you?

https://www.instagram.com/p/CAjbyAQDG-e/