Shakespearean: Watch as Red Bull Airborne Trials turn into beach theatre, “C’mon pussy! I put Occy in jail! Occy’s in jail! I’ll put this board in your arse!”

High emotion yields a wonderful and unexpected drama at surfing contest.

Rare is the surfing contest that takes its theatre from the water and brings it directly to the audience. 

In this short video taken at Duranbah by Cam Macdougall, a sixteen-year-old high jumper, we see a freesurfer who, believing he was wronged in the water by a competitor in the Red Bull Airborne trials, “gutter stomps” Tane Bowden’s board. 

For further effect, he adds,

“Cmon, pussy!”

“You’re all fucking cocks.”

“I put Occy in jail!” 

“Occy’s in jail!”

“I’m going to put this in your arse.”

“It was so good, so entertaining,” reports Macdougall, wh0 was preparing for his own heat when the action took place, “pumping waves at a comp, blow-ups.”

What happened? 

“I was in the middle of a heat,” says Tane Bowden. “I creased my board which could’ve been fixed. I then grabbed my other board and surfed the rest of my heat and as I was in the heat this dude runs up and snapped it. I come in and ask, ‘Why did you do that?’ He said he didn’t give a fuck.”

The freesurfer, Brett Fairbank, a forty-four-year-old artist noted for the“positive vibes” of his work says, and this is coming via a DM ‘cause he didn’t want to do a phone interview,

“The sponsored guy (Tane Bowden) rolls into the tent with snapped board. I was waiting for my *heat. I’m like board’s done and jumped on the snapped board to finish it off in a fun way. He got pissed off then I have five guys chasing me down to bash me. So I just got out of there and went home.”

In reply I write,

“What was the ‘I put Occy in jail!’ line about?

I get a message about Occ (allegedly) punching him in the head when he was a grom and (allegedly) “assaulting” his pal.

There is no clarification on jail time served.

A further investigation reveals,

“I’m a spiritual surfer artist that enjoys a free life. I also do uber driving two nights a week for money I love it for fun and enjoy the conversations interactions meeting new energy. During the week I surf, and paint, and live my free life,” Fairbank told USA Art News.

Good times!

* Name not on heat draw.

https://www.instagram.com/p/CBX-HANjDQe/

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Chad Lebrone
Chad Lebrone
6 years ago

I’m wondering if he’s a performance artist and we’ve all been sucked in to it?

Chad Lebrone
Chad Lebrone
6 years ago

We need a collab album between this guy and Slippery Surfa.

FelipesFrontFoot
FelipesFrontFoot
6 years ago

“Come on pussy” he shouts as he runs and skips away, so good

Ed
Ed
6 years ago

Everytime I see a surfer with a sticker on his board from now on I will feel compelled to yell ” I put occy in jail”.

Joe Deal
Joe Deal
6 years ago

“It’s just a scratch …”

Justin Housman
Justin Housman
6 years ago

Turns out our impending 15 minutes of fame is actually just being shamed online.

Dogsnuts
Dogsnuts
6 years ago
Reply to  Justin Housman

HAHAHAHA YESS!

turts
turts
6 years ago

That’s a big gerkin to take in the arse

janeausten
janeausten
6 years ago

“Shakesperean” ….Hmmm, Falstaff perhaps, showing the “the better part of valour” ?

Joe Deal
Joe Deal
6 years ago
Reply to  janeausten

To Snake, or not to Snake, That Is The Question … how you answer it defines who you are …

Beef & Beer
Beef & Beer
6 years ago

His gherkin and the ‘art’ on it didn’t look very good.
Hopefully Charlie won’t get one of those next…

Uneducated
Uneducated
6 years ago

I am still trying to come up with a reasonable explanation as to why he thought mentioning getting occy locked up from being punched in the head by him, was something worth bragging about…and how he thought it was going to help him in this situation?
Just say no to drugs kids

Joe Deal
Joe Deal
6 years ago
Reply to  Uneducated

just that occy used to be high all the time and needed to get punched once in a while, hardly unique …

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago

Surfcore 2000&dumb seems very familiar with this guy.
Ex flame? ?

Gino
Gino
6 years ago

Cocaine is one hell of a drug.

Joe Deal
Joe Deal
6 years ago
Reply to  Gino

occy did party hearty with Rick, he was a force in H-Wood for a bit there …

Clive Chadwick
Clive Chadwick
6 years ago

Foolishly clicked on “I`ll put this board in your arse” and got directed to DMS site where the Gherkin model is on offer for 800AD with FCS or Futures options. If I was the grom I`d be hoping it`s the 4 footer with FCSII as my mate says they pop out all the time.

Ed
Ed
6 years ago
Reply to  Clive Chadwick

Clive, U clicked on “I’ll put this in your arse” there is no board mentioned.
We are all surfers here, it’s ok to click on a Link to see what can be put in your arse. Totally no judgement.

Clive Chadwick
Clive Chadwick
6 years ago
Reply to  Ed

Happy Feet,you`re very kind and understanding soul.. I should have said “I’m going put this in your arse.” It`s just after “occy`s in jail”. Click on that and you too can have a Gherkin.

Chazz Michael Michaels
Chazz Michael Michaels
6 years ago

What a fat mess.

Shroom
Shroom
6 years ago

Pull him off the BBQ the cunts done.

@surfads
@surfads
6 years ago

Wait, that’s not Occy?

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago
Reply to  @surfads

More ALP grubs exposed today. 3 in one day
What a buncha crooks, misogynists and pedos

Party Pete
Party Pete
6 years ago

Well there’s no good on the other side either you fascist arse kisser. This is you “I love dump and scumo” kiss kiss smooch smooch – “ooo I love sports rorts and tax breaks for mining companies” kiss kiss smooch “mmm lie to me dump I love it when you lie dump, thanks for lying like Pinocchio” kiss smoochy smooch “all lives matter that’s right thanks Pauline Hanson” kiss kissy smooch lick “oh Alan Jones is being taken off his radio show that was losing money, oh no, who is going to give a voice to rich corporates at the expense of everyday Australians? Oh no” kiss kiss

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago
Reply to  Party Pete

Hook line and sinker.

Joe Deal
Joe Deal
6 years ago
Reply to  Party Pete

should be cuffed and forced to listen to Midnight Oil 24/7 for a long bit, may cure them, either way they deserve it so if not NP …

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago
Reply to  Joe Deal

Nothing after Head injuries please I beg you.

Joe Deal
Joe Deal
6 years ago

Time Has Come!!! pay the rent …

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago
Reply to  Joe Deal

Being a born and bred native here I expect a cut.

J H
J H
6 years ago
Reply to  Party Pete

All Language Matters™ except, apparently, for Pete.

What the fuck did I just read???

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago
Reply to  J H

He’s a bit tired and emotional from yelling at statues

J H
J H
6 years ago

The Abe Lincoln one makes him especially mad, huh?

Owen Wright's Brains
Owen Wright's Brains
6 years ago

or hiding from brown people.

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago
Reply to  Party Pete

!!

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago
Reply to  Party Pete
Durban Poison
Durban Poison
6 years ago

And redneck’s dont just fuck children they fuck the whole world

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago
Reply to  Durban Poison

Get some help then.

Durban Poison
Durban Poison
6 years ago

I know how much you lot hate facts but the 10 up votes on Party Pete’s neat summation of BG’s favourite “facist arse kisser” shows that help had indeed arrived.

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago
Reply to  Durban Poison

It’s a lot ain’t it.
I’m not deterred
In fact encouraged.
I’ll shine a light where its needed.

Durban Poison
Durban Poison
6 years ago

Haha, just like your orange god. Love the commitment of the dumb

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago
Reply to  Durban Poison

It’s a calling!!
And you’ll be angry for at least 4 more years which is very satisfying

Durban Poison
Durban Poison
6 years ago

Nah, the dumb always fail in the end. Especially when their own ignorant hate bites them in the ass like Pete did to yours

Durban Poison
Durban Poison
6 years ago

Anyhow, off for some barrels now while you keep surfing the thing you love best

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago
Reply to  Durban Poison

Enjoy!!

Durban Poison
Durban Poison
5 years ago

And just like that, Pop goes the weasel

Owen Wright's Brains
Owen Wright's Brains
6 years ago

hahaha. “the sky is blue”
that’ll be 10k thanks.

Billy Hunt
Billy Hunt
6 years ago

You should join up

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago
Reply to  Billy Hunt

Yeah I should
Shake out all the filth and get bring it back to the workers and away from the inner city sickos and weirdos

Party Pete
Party Pete
6 years ago

The type of people that want to be in power in Australia is fuckin’ scary. Labor has been on the nose ever since they went for Latham instead of Kim Beazley and this right wing faction you shed a light on yesterday is ruining the party from the inside. Lib is not much better being so beholden to corpo interests and their ugly self entitlement with the public purse then to cap things off Scumo goes and deposes the only respectable Lib leader in living memory. Richard Di Natali from the Greens seemed alright but he’s gone already and I can’t see them winning much more of the vote.

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago
Reply to  Party Pete

Now that was a bit more civilized.
You can be left without being an asshole.
Although it’s very rare.

Party Pete
Party Pete
6 years ago

Well I ‘d rather have you here being all crazy right wing than going down some algorithmic rabit hole on Youtube and start believing conspiracy theories as well.

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago
Reply to  Party Pete

I just watched the drum.
It inspired me to seek more welfare.

Party Pete
Party Pete
6 years ago

You’re watching it wrong – try NITV next, illuminating.

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago
Reply to  Party Pete

I have but its very race centric
Whereas I’m a child of the universe.

Building The Revolution
Building The Revolution
6 years ago

That looked like a scene from a Monty Python movie.

Wiggolly's Paddling Style
Wiggolly's Paddling Style
6 years ago

Fuck it’s like looking in the mirror.

Dogsnuts
Dogsnuts
6 years ago

He is quite the walking anti drug campaign. Hopping mad if you will.

Wiggolly's Paddling Style
Wiggolly's Paddling Style
6 years ago
Reply to  Dogsnuts

I built a new board rack on the weekend and fucked it up so couldn’t fit one of the boards. It had a crease in it so I just snapped it like my Goldie counterpart Brett Fairbank.

Dogsnuts
Dogsnuts
6 years ago

Creases on boards are like cum stains on a favourite tee shirt. They should just be jettisoned but it’s really hard.

Billy Hunt
Billy Hunt
6 years ago
Reply to  Dogsnuts

Seriously … your t-shirt? Have you no respect … that’s what your socks are for!

Dogsnuts
Dogsnuts
6 years ago
Reply to  Billy Hunt

Socks are filthy haha.

Billy Hunt
Billy Hunt
6 years ago
Reply to  Dogsnuts

That’s the way I like ’em

longtom
longtom
6 years ago

2 days a week?

he must be on scomo’s surf team or the pension.

that don’t pay rent.

LyndieIronsMammaryGland
LyndieIronsMammaryGland
6 years ago
Reply to  longtom

Shard ain’t cheap either

OffRocker
OffRocker
6 years ago

Tis around here…

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago
Reply to  longtom

Plus sized model?

Dogsnuts
Dogsnuts
6 years ago
Reply to  longtom

His week only consists of two days.

Joe Deal
Joe Deal
6 years ago
Reply to  longtom

USA is getting the pension next year, can u blv it???

Greebnurt Hurkurmurgurt
Greebnurt Hurkurmurgurt
6 years ago
Reply to  longtom

I looked at his Instagram and he posted a few times how “your taxes get deposited to my account twice a month so I can have fun”. Sounds like he’s on the dole at working Australians expense. And possibly spending some of the money on crank.

Owen Wright's Brains
Owen Wright's Brains
6 years ago
Reply to  longtom

fri, sat night taxiing can make moneyz. 15 years ago could get $300-$400 a night in byron.

longtom
longtom
6 years ago

still money to be made in Taxis in Lismore.

day-time work.

Owen Wright's Brains
Owen Wright's Brains
6 years ago
Reply to  longtom

ice delivery

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago

He shoulda smashed more boards.
Grom cunts in their dumb airshitshow

Greebnurt Hurkurmurgurt
Greebnurt Hurkurmurgurt
6 years ago

Haha. Now that’s a different perspective.

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago

Derek leads this lot around by their bell ends


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