Vindication for Laird.
Three years ago, to the day-ish, famous waterperson Laird Hamilton was stopped in his Malibu by celebrity news gatherer TMZ and asked about shark attacks. The one-time surfer responded that more people are killed by soda machines than bitten by sharks, adding, “The main reason to be bitten is a woman with her period. People don’t really think about that. Obviously if a woman has her period there’s a certain amount of blood in the water…”
Condemnation was swift from actress Lena Dunham, the National Organization of Women and scientists as Hamilton’s statement had no basis in observable fact.
Until yesterday when a group of surfers were out at Pacifica, very near San Francisco, when an eight-foot Great White Shark bypassed a “cluster” of men and made a beeline for the lone female.
According to Bevan Bell, who was out amongst it, “I saw this big gray shape, just under the surface of the water, and that top fin, and the big shark went directly under her. The length of that sucker was like 8 feet. It went right towards her, and as the wave lifted her up [on her board], it literally went right under her.”
Bell also said that he was yelling at her to pull her legs out of the water, but she didn’t understand what he was saying.
Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus, am I right?
In any case, it is unclear if menstruation was a factor or not but it can be certain that Laird Hamilton is sitting in his Malibu compound right now, maybe in an ice bath, drinking an invigorating cup of coffee mixed with his eponymous SuperFood Creamer.
Feeling good about his big brain.
Chatting with Lena about stuff.
#LiveLikeLaird
Also, how do you feel about the name “Bevan?”
Yay or Nay?
1. The quote is stolen from a SF Chronicle article.
2. The woman in the water probably had gone through menopause.
3. Take a swipe at my name? Thu fuk? Probably no more strange than Laird or Lena.
Have a nice day V.
Have a nice day V.
Oh no, he just pointed out WHY a female is a female, and a male is a male! He didn’t anger them because he said that, he angers these mentally unstable feminist because he pointed out an undeniable FACT & it separates us, and for some wacked out reason they don’t like that. Only an idiot would argue with that! Gee, blood attracts sharks, women bleed for a week and don’t die, but he’s wrong for pointing that out? Yep, absolutely nothing wrong here! Only a mentally unstable feminist, sjw, or liberal would have a temper tantrum over differences between us! If I didn’t believe in God before listening to these mentally disturbed wackjobs, I do now!
To be honest, when I was in my early teens I was petrified to go into the water when it was that time. Mainly because commonsense states blood equals shark.
Well I’m glad you got that off your chest …. have a nice day V.
Bored and Delusional is the name of MY PUNK BAND and you may now refer to me as Mr Bickerton or Dumb K#nt .
Soon there will be an essential oil which will deter sharks.
What’s the difference (genuinely interested)
caps lock or you can hold down that other arrow button.
Those were the good old days… Laird gate. I really miss it. And joeljitsu.
The number of shark stories on BeachGrit has increased by 235% in 2020.
Incel predators > apex predators
You boys must be missing …. Stab ?
Vonr She is on a 24 hour shift doing surgery …. what’s your excuse giggles
Bevan is a good name for a beer drinker as it has ‘bev’ at the start, which is short for beverage (bevvie), and beer is by far the best of the popularly known bevvies.
It’s almost 8am here in NZ so I’m cracking a cold one for breakfast to rejoice the clear sunny sky new day (which have been rare lately due to it fuckin’ pissing down with rain the last few months)…
cheers bevo
I wasn’t moved by the shark eating the woman part of the story. I looked up who Lena Dunham is and now have nightmares. WHO tells these people they should be unclothed publicly?
Is it possible Chas doesn’t surf due to sympathetic menstruation resulting from his mommy homemaker status?
Bro! You didn’t see him in the tram-line last year? Rad-Dad, not “mommy homemaker”!
I did see someone face planting over and over in ungroomed snow deeper than 1 inch on the Snow King bunny slope @ the tow rope. All geared up, Ray Bans, neck tat. Wife rips, Chas, not so much.
After that crushing multi slab hold down at Lemoore better safe than sorry. Someone needs to clean the house, do the laundry and cook.
Hello Jackson …….. welcome to the present or in your case , the future .
Have you arrived from the Middle Ages or the 50s ?
I suppose I just grew up in a different environment (Wyoming) with more old fashioned ideas and expectations. Hey if Chas and Ashton want to pretend fight about their masculinity go for it. Neither one of them could possibly hurt the other and we all get a laugh. Self humiliation isn’t my thing but each to his/her own.
Sounds like a nice place , Wyoming ….. Heraclitus, the Greek philosopher said, “Change is the only constant in life.” When we think of Evolution , we are fed “survival of the fittest “ but in reality “ Adapt or Die “ is probably closer to the truth . I have lived many lives in many countries but my latest role , as a stay at home dad ,another enormous change , from the life of a vagabond aging playboy surfer , has been the most enriching yet toughest at the same time . I was lucky enough to grow up surrounded by strong , beautiful , intelligent and empathetic women , now married to one and I have never , repeat , never felt emasculated .
Good for you. I say that sincerely. Both my wife and I are ER docs, as we work a rather odd schedule at times we share home duties as required. Better for us both and better for the girls.
The whole Chas surfer, hipster, tatted up, sunnies and wife beater indoors, insult my wife I will play fight, smug, snarky thing gets tiresome. Just let Derek, Jen and LT take over and move on. BG has brought together a clever, smart, global community, but to me Chas just has jumped the shark (sorry for that analogy).
Keep up the good work JL …Chas like a pebble in a shoe is BG’s Enzyme , a biological catalyst whose role is to create a reaction …. perhaps not always the one we feel or seek ?
He is a author with talent, I read his earlier books and enjoyed them. The whole BG shark, hipster, WSL, thing is just wearing. This is a viable platform, Derek, Jen and LT do some interesting, pertinent, thoughtful writing. Mocking everyone isn’t going to get you advertisers.
Lodgegrit is dead, BG without change will follow, and that would be a shame.
Wait til you read the latest! And then the one after that! Also, since when was getting advertisers the goal?
Exactly how I see it. He’s bored and trying to create fun, which often involves antagonizing people..
https://www.youtube.com/wat…
Is that code for “they’ve got a gun to my head, please help me” ?…
hehehe
No is code for life these days is complicated and hopefully we are doing our best.
Nah …The kids , they love to scream and make out they rule the roost …. BUT NOT ON MY SHIFT !
Anyway, we just moved into a new place and some hippy neighbor , who lives out the back complained about the noise and suggested I shut the windows ….we had no music playing and weren’t fighting or screaming ….. in the middle of summer at 3pm on a Sunday while all the neighborhood kids in the cul de sac were doing what kids do ,Make fucking Noise ! . I haven’t lived in the suburbs since the 80s
Is this the New Normal ?
Hhmmm, bummer
I finally left the suburbs (after much to-ing and fro-ing since the ’80’s) seven years ago and live on a farm now, where I can fire guns from my kitchen window at will with no whinging hippy neighbours complaints haha
Good for you B n B funnily enough there are 2 places you can make lots of noise … on a farm and in the inner city … I spent 10 years in construction then 20 years in bars and Night Clubs literally being shouted at and shouting back just trying to serve clients …. There is noise and NOISE…. anyway I might need to borrow the gun …. I don’t suppose it has a silencer …. TO KEEP THE NOISE DOWN !
You must have got a lot of spit on your ears?
suggest to the hippies they wash themselves with a mullet and go for a swim
Yes a possible diplomatic solution …. though Malcolm Mclaren‘s “ Call all Hippys boring old farts and set light to them “ came to mind .
You did not see that. I rip groomers too.
Anyway, fucking Bevan, fuck that.
Actually, now that the Village is completely mobbed and over-run, shredding the groomers off of Casper and The Teton lift is the way to go . Powder days are a thing of the past at JHMR.
How many Disqus accounts does one man need?
Just to give you a little perspective, if I had to #LiveLikeLaird, I’d be squatting all the time.
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
https://www.youtube.com/wat…
It’s quite possible that the shark was female, menstruating, and therefore angry and irrational in its behavior.
Just imagine when she reaches Menopause ? …… or is it Sharkopause in this case ?
Maneaterpause?
Oh fuck no!
If Chas hasn’t heard of Maneaterpause, there’s no way he is aware of Maneaterhiatus.
if a Polynesian tells you her Aumakua is Niuhi believe her and react accordingly …
Don’t Fuck with Da Niuhi …..
Watch out! You are going to upset the feminist because that’s true, and you’re going to upset the mentally unstable that think they can change sexes, because you are pointing out a FACT OF LIFE that sperates us, and why a male could never be a female! You won’t upset a normal person, because we already knew that!
what’s you thoughts on female judges?
Well, I don’t really care for Judge Judy, but the old gray-haired judge in Cheech and Chongs Up In Smoke drinking the pitcher of vodka during the trial is awesome!