Watch: The last asterisk World Champion,
and part-time genius, C.J. Hobgood suggests a whole new way to
crown abandoned 2020’s King or Queen!
By Chas Smith
I'm losing it!
The World Surf League, weeks ago, abandoned its
2020 season with very little fanfare. No tour, no champion, no even
attempt to turn Coronavirus into Corona Extra Mexican Lager.
This, rightly, did not sit proper with Clifton James Hobgood who
won his singular World Title in a 9/11 shortened year. He did not
win one event and three were cancelled, due al-Qaeda’s attack on
New York City but 2001, still had a champion and it was he.
Fine and deserving.
Therefore he has suggested that we, The People™, crown 2020’s
king or queen in lieu of any leadership from Santa Monica.
Criteria?
David Lee and I discussed after I ended a long rant about Kelly
Slater gagging to be made fun of and calling him a dumbshit
(1:04ish) but it is all half-baked and needs you.
Needs your part-time genius.
2020 will belong to us. And, very likely, 2021 too.
More as the story develops.
Loading comments...
Load Comments
0
The World Surf League reels as President
Trump threatens to cancel only success story, robust TikTok growth
among pre-teen girls who enjoy choreographed dancing!
By Chas Smith
"It's so endemic to who we are as a sport."
As with many business, the Covid years have not
been kind to our World Surf League. 2019 ended with such promise,
one of the more exciting finals in professional surfing history
delivering an Italo Ferreira title. Co-Waterperson of the Year and
League owner, Dirk Ziff, buoyed by the thrill, quietly floated its
availability on the market for $150m+. A newly appointed CEO Erik
“ELo” Logan getting to work creating the programming of his dreams
including unboxing shows and home tours. A Chief Community Officer,
Tim Greenberg, sensing opportunity on new predominately pre-teen
Chinese social media platform TikTok, declaring, “It’s so endemic
to who we are as a sport.”
Enter the Peking Suck.
The 2020 World Championship Tour wiped off the books, much staff
furloughed, Rumbles at the Ranch.
Greenberg, further declaring, “As [TikTok] creates enhanced
tools and more opportunities for us to reach newer audiences, we
want to make sure that we’re focused on what’s going to drive our
business and that consumer journey that connects back to the
WSL.”
Did those “enhanced tools” creating “newer audiences” involve
Beijing spying, stealing user information, etc.?
Possibly, and last President Trump threatened to ban TikTok
entirely from the U.S. market, something entirely within his power
so to do.
Thankfully for girls aged 7 – 10 and the World Surf League,
Trump reversed
course over the weekend and gave Microsoft a 45-day
window in which to purchase TikTok’s U.S., Canada, Australia and
New Zealand operations.
Cautious relief could be sensed emanating from the World Surf
League’s Santa Monica headquarters in the form of cute little
dancing videos.
More as the story develops.
Loading comments...
Load Comments
0
Fierce: Santa Monica Surf School slams
“woke” one-star rating on Google Reviews, “I don’t capitulate to
cancel culture and snowflakes…It would appear censorship is alive
and well. Welcome to the Orwellian dystopia”
By Derek Rielly
"Anyone who is offended by facts should not book a
lesson with us because I only speak the truth...."
Interesting times, as they say.
Take a corner, don’t deviate into the centre.
If you veer left try and avoid the circular firing squad; those
on the right try and justify your orange king.
Anyway, this is pretty good.
The owner of a Santa Monica surf school recently cancelled a
lesson ‘cause of the Pandemic, emailing pupils that it was due to
“the Chinese flu.”
“Lesson got cancelled due to covid-19 and I received and email
stating it was canceled due to “the Ch*n*se flu” this is very
unprofessional of you and I will not be rescheduling. DO NOT
SUPPORT THIS BUSINESS”
And here, the owner stepped in.
I’ve written this 3 time but google keeps censoring my reply
so here’s one last attemp without saying where the virus
originated, maybe this one will not be censored.
Not quite sure why your panties are in a wad. Where did the
virus come from? What did the media call it in the beginning? So
was I wrong to call it what they did? Amazing at how people forget
these things and would rather be politically correct. So when I was
refunding you, I only stated a fact and referenced the name the
media was calling it at the time. The Media said that chXnxx was
the source of the virus so my refund message to you I put in the
information that was the available to me. I should have had the
foresight to call it covid long before scientist came up with the
name, I guess I’m just not that clever. I’m sorry me referencing
the origin of the virus offended you. I hope this helps you better
understand my frame of my mind.
Oh and BTW, I will not allow you to reschedule with us. .
And as far as your statement ” DO NOT SUPPORT THIS BUSINESS”, I
don’t capitulate to cancel culture and snowflakes. And anyone who
is offended by facts should not book a lesson with us because I
only speak the truth….well for as long as freedom of speech is
still a right. It would appear censorship is alive and well.
Welcome to the Orwellian dystopia.
Just to let you know I was deeply depressed and frustrated
by having my rights stripped away, my business shut down and being
stuck inside my small apartment for months on end. I felt like my
whole life was falling apart. My business which I have put my
blood, sweat, and tears into for 15 years was dead and I was
stressing out about it shutting down forever and surfing is know so
my future seemed so dead. 2020 was the year planed on buying a
house and possibly retiring and after the STAY AT HOME order, my
whole future seemed lost. I am a social animal, an out doorsman and
a waterman and all that was taken away from me. FYI I also I have a
compromised immune system and I’m 51, so I was hyper worried about
the possibly of catching the virus and possibly dying. Also being a
surfer, drowning is my greatest fear and as we know those who are
seriously affected basically drown in their own fluids. Seeing my
country that I so love and served for being decimated, seeing the
world fall into choas and all because of a cover up. So No,
renaming the virus will change it’s origin.
Perhaps you should direct your angst and frustration for the
global implications due to a cover up that has cost trillions of
dollars, put millions of small business out of business forever,
countless people suffering, lost homes, lost jobs, tens of
thousands of people dead and dying, the families that have to morn
their loss, etc, etc, etc….. But no wait…. you did your part! You
wrote a bad review! now you are a true activist you have stood up
for… what? CPP narrative, the far left, and censorship,….
YAAYYYYY!!!! Go celebrate yourself. Sheepeople like you disgust me.
Get a life.
Hardly succinct, but heartfelt yes?
Whose side y’on?
Loading comments...
Load Comments
0
Coming soon: National Geographic’s “Shark
vs. Surfer” episode wherein waterpeople discuss the “humiliations
daily served” by man-eating beasts!
By Chas Smith
"The interviews delve into the shocking details of
what happened and why many of the surfers have continued to ride
the waves after their attacks."
As you well know, one of the most successful
ventures in proud history of cable television has been the
Discovery Channel’s Shark Week. The mid-tier educational network
was nothing but a click-through between Country Music Television
and E! once starring Kelly Slater’s biggest fran (friend-fan) Sal
Maskekela.
But then Discovery discovered sharks and the rest, as they say,
is history.
Well, similarly ignored NatGeo (National Geographic) has decided
to catch some of that white lightening and launched its very own
SharkFest.
Tonight, Sunday, August 2. at 8 p.m./7 p.m. CST with an encore
presentation on Nat Geo WILD on Thursday, August 13, at 9 p.m./8
p.m. CST, “Sharks vs. Surfers” will air.
The episode will detail the daily humiliations of prancing about
in the man-eating beasts’ watery domain. The indignities etc. Also,
“The interviews delve into the shocking details of what happened
and why many of the surfers have continued to ride the waves after
their attacks.”
Lastly, the special will include insights from marine biologists
Ryan Johnson and Dr. Stephen Kajiura to provide context on just how
likely shark attacks are while surfing at these popular,
shark-filled spots.
Derek, Longtom and I recently discussed sharks ourselves on
Dirty Water (Listen here
later). I discussed too much but only because I become
overly excited anytime Longtom is on the screen.
I love him very much but will try to control my mouth-running
glee next time.
Loading comments...
Load Comments
0
Listen: Longtom on electro-shock treatment
for Great Whites; Chas Smith continues his outspoken advocacy for
kicking dogs. “You see a good thick dog, kick it in the ribs. It
feels so good! The dog likes it, you like it. Everyone wins!”
By Derek Rielly
Dirty Water, episode twenty-one, reveals those deep
warm truths that can't be hidden even by the oddball antics of Chas
Smith…
Incredible, yes, but this podcast falls even deeper than
usual into a quagmire of professional jealousy (Charlie Smith on
Nick Carroll, “He’s a baby of a man, he’s honestly two feet tall…”)
and brings stupidity to such a height (Chas Smith on the
extermination of Great White and bull sharks), the listener may
switch off for good.
But, do stay.
For many deep truths are ultimately revealed, including the
concept of tonic immobility, where a man-eating shark can be made
helpless by placing hands on the snout; why you should never raise
the spinnaker on a seventy-foot yacht en route to Mexico from San
Diego while children are wandering the decks untethered and Shane
Dorian shows his former master Kelly Slater how to respond to
trolls.
The episode, which is number twenty-one, concludes with a
discussion on the Torah/Talmud, Lutheran and Presbyterian
architecture and why Longtom would fear death by White far less if
only he let Jesus Christ dance on the marble tabletop of his
heart.
“I don’t know why anyone ever dodges this punch! Take the punch
full on. Go to heaven,” says Chas. “It’s Occam’s Razor. If I’m
wrong we’re all in hell anyway and we’ll giggle and burn. If I’m
right, we’re in heaven.”
Loading comments...
Load Comments
0
Jon Pyzel and Matt Biolos by
@theneedforshutterspeed/Step Bros