Listen: Longtom on electro-shock treatment for Great Whites; Chas Smith continues his outspoken advocacy for kicking dogs. “You see a good thick dog, kick it in the ribs. It feels so good! The dog likes it, you like it. Everyone wins!”

Dirty Water, episode twenty-one, reveals those deep warm truths that can't be hidden even by the oddball antics of Chas Smith…

Incredible, yes, but this podcast falls even deeper than usual into a quagmire of professional jealousy (Charlie Smith on Nick Carroll, “He’s a baby of a man, he’s honestly two feet tall…”) and brings stupidity to such a height (Chas Smith on the extermination of Great White and bull sharks), the listener may switch off for good.

But, do stay.

For many deep truths are ultimately revealed, including the concept of tonic immobility, where a man-eating shark can be made helpless by placing hands on the snout; why you should never raise the spinnaker on a seventy-foot yacht en route to Mexico from San Diego while children are wandering the decks untethered and Shane Dorian shows his former master Kelly Slater how to respond to trolls.

The episode, which is number twenty-one, concludes with a discussion on the Torah/Talmud, Lutheran and Presbyterian architecture and why Longtom would fear death by White far less if only he let Jesus Christ dance on the marble tabletop of his heart.

“I don’t know why anyone ever dodges this punch! Take the punch full on. Go to heaven,” says Chas. “It’s Occam’s Razor. If I’m wrong we’re all in hell anyway and we’ll giggle and burn. If I’m right, we’re in heaven.”