Protected manatee found swimming Florida waters with word “TRUMP” scrawled into its back: “It’s clear that whoever harmed this defenseless, gentle giant is capable of doing grave violence and needs to be apprehended immediately!”

Win $5000.

Let’s have a little real talk, here. What is the most precious thing that you have vandalized? Young, dumb, full of dumb in a museum with an outdoor sculpture garden, confronted with a rotund Gauguin, Sharpie in pocket? Backpacking through Australia’s dead center, to Ayers Rock, sharp stick in hand?

Oh the misguided thoughts of youth. The crooked behaviors but have you ever vandalized a living thing?

Well, a manatee, or sea cow, was recently vandalized, or adorned depending on your perspective, with the word “TRUMP” in Florida over the weekend.

$5,000 reward offered for information on who scraped 'TRUMP' into manatee's back

Sailors used to think the large, herbivorous marine animals were mermaids and advocates against voter fraud which may have led to the marking.

Outraged, The Center for Biological Diversity, a conservation charity, is offering $5,000 for information leading to the conviction of those responsible. Director Jaclyn Lopez said, “It’s heartbreaking that this manatee was subjected to this vile, criminal act. It’s clear that whoever harmed this defenceless, gentle giant is capable of doing grave violence and needs to be apprehended immediately.

But can we be honest? What if the manatee in question is, indeed, a Trump supporter? A rally-attending, MAGA-hat-wearing fan of the President?

Will she be tossed straight into that Basket of Deplorables with the rest?

Real talk.

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Snowbored
Snowbored
5 years ago

Where’s Bex ?

?uzzled
?uzzled
5 years ago

The manatee now has people shitting on the floor in support of him.

?uzzled
?uzzled
5 years ago

I was arrested at age 15 for spray painting a school with 2 friends. Not my proudest moment. Recently I was reacquainting with one of those guys and he mentioned the other guy who became an internationally famous artist who works in spray paint. Redemption.

Whitefolkswithdreadsarefunny
Whitefolkswithdreadsarefunny
5 years ago

Does Jamie O’Brien have an alibi during
the time of the crime? If not JOB then look for a white male Floridian whose father and uncle are the same person. Of course that only narrows it to about 10% of the population.

drew peacock
drew peacock
5 years ago

This is a crime against hugh manatee!

Lemon Next to the Pie
Lemon Next to the Pie
5 years ago

Antifa! Antifa! ANtifa! ANTifa! ANTIFA!

Firelipe Torpedo
Firelipe Torpedo
5 years ago

That manatee is also a huge Brett Simpson fan

Urchin Sepsis
Urchin Sepsis
5 years ago

Center for Biological Diversity. These cunts had the whole California crab fleet tied up through Thanksgiving and Christmas

Really?
Really?
5 years ago
Reply to  Urchin Sepsis
Gino
Gino
5 years ago

Told boss at Railex Aluminium in Brookvale to stick it, and knew I wasn’t going to get paid.
Super glued the front door lock that night.
Next morning sat in car across the street and waited for Stewie an Andrew to open up.
Was funny watching them try to get the key in.
Gave them a beep and drove off.
They appreciated the effort and laughed, They hated him too.

Otto
Otto
5 years ago

Some manatees try their hardest to grab fame on Beach Grit like Great Whites. Past efforts at stalking swimmers haven’t proved fruitful. But get your best manatee friend to scrub “Trump” on you and BAM!! Beach Grit fame!!! Booyah!
https://youtu.be/dLQR5MDPnx8

Phat-wan kerr
Phat-wan kerr
5 years ago
Reply to  Otto

not clicking on video. afraid it is of my family trip to the beach last Christmas when my misses got into the rum cans.

Otto
Otto
5 years ago
Reply to  Phat-wan kerr

Rum is the friendliest of spirits.

Dick Simmons
Dick Simmons
5 years ago
Reply to  Otto

Big girl about had a heart attack. That’s a great vid.

Ricky Spanish
Ricky Spanish
5 years ago

Paint that manatee orange and you’ve got a pretty spot on doppelganger

Really?
Really?
5 years ago
Reply to  Ricky Spanish
Phat-wan kerr
Phat-wan kerr
5 years ago

my money is on his misses or a jaded lover.

Really?
Really?
5 years ago
Reply to  Phat-wan kerr

Either way, good partner. Who doesn’t like getting their back rubbed…

Phat-wan kerr
Phat-wan kerr
5 years ago
Reply to  Really?

case of mistaken identity.

Really?
Really?
5 years ago
Reply to  Phat-wan kerr

case of misplaced outrage

Really?
Really?
5 years ago

Hahah can’t imagine how incensed the tree hugger was who discovered that scrub brush etched algae covered sea cow…. I bet manatees are delicious… Smart captain that tubbed those things in the hold, fresh steaks for the voyage to the new world….

c4
c4
5 years ago
Reply to  Really?

Must be good deep fried.

Really?
Really?
5 years ago
Reply to  c4

toss that plumper into the fry basket

c4
c4
5 years ago
Reply to  Really?

Yum, crackly skin.

c4
c4
5 years ago

I think labeling an obese bottom feeder Trump is pretty genius.

Moreton Bay Porridge
Moreton Bay Porridge
5 years ago
Reply to  c4

Pete Evans did this.

Hobbsy
Hobbsy
5 years ago

Can’t wait for Kelly to slap an Outerknown sticker on one complete with a statement about how he supports manatees.

Really?
Really?
5 years ago
Reply to  Hobbsy

Re-home rescue manatees into all surf pools!

dickie toledo
dickie toledo
5 years ago

looks like the work of jussie smollet.

Return of the Samsung Board
Return of the Samsung Board
5 years ago

I drew uncircumcised dicks all over my primary school the year after I left

Most vicious at age 9

Ode to a forey at the caretakers cost : (

Really?
Really?
5 years ago

Genital mutilation is fucked up… severed foreskins making the monthly payment on doc’s merecedes….


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