Cool Mom Fab. | Photo: Stab magazine

Famous surfboard shaper transitions heretofore iconic style: “Is it just me or does Matt look like the cool mom that will let everyone drink at the house as long as no one’s driving!”

Possible best surfboard shaper in the world debuts new Cool Mom Fab look.

I made my name in this surf game not caring. Writing what I felt, writing my first addled impression without connection to the levers of “cool” or “surf prestige”, and my first addled impression of Matt Biolos’s …Lost transitioning to energy drinks, some two decades ago was …silly.

I wrote something about him liking little boys.

Unfounded, incorrect, absolutely rude and not even related to anything but he was kind enough to call my then, and now, muse Derek Rielly to say, “What the fuck?

Derek told me I should go down and talk with Matt, stifling a giggle.

I did and thought Matt might like Pick Up Stix (fake pan-Asian cuisine one tiny step up from Panda Express) so brought some.

Matt said, “Why did you write that I like little boys?”

I said, “Because I thought it was funny. I was wrong.”

Then we transitioned to talking about World War II.

I loved Matt Biolos from that moment on.

Willing to take surfing’s idiocy on the chin and not care because ain’t that the best of us?

An un-serious take on life?

A funny-if-wrong view?

Pre-Makeover.

Well, Matt has recently transitioned his heretofore iconic style by dying his hair and embracing a new look in the new and reportedly wonderful Andy Irons warm-over.

Fabulous?

Maybe.

Via Instagram:

“Is it just me or does Matt look like the cool mom that will let everyone drink at the house as long as no one’s driving?”

Matt?

Pick Up Stix or…. your call. Because you totally do.

Ha!

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Greebnurt Hurkurmurgurt

He looks like an angry lesbian from the show Portlandia.

diamond chief

Kids of the black hole

John Smith

According to what I’ve been told, any commentary about someone’s appearance or lifestyle is either shaming or _____phobic.

Oh wait, never-mind, doesn’t apply to straight, white males. Carry on…

Dung beetle

I had to look that up but it’s good.
Loquacious?

ricmatic

When you use the word echolalia a lot its echolalia.
So I think echolalia is the word for echolalia.
Its what babies do. and birds.

Strawman

The shit-stirring and meaningless-meaningful articles are much appreciated!

toaster redux

Lesbian chic

Dogsnuts

Nah that’s petuli.

Eddie Haiku

The manicured look
Of a man preparing for
A stock market float

Uneducated

I love you like a brother chas…but if you ever say I like little boys…you be pulling them stix out of your skull

Shampoo Poo

Matt Biolas is from Chino, CA.

Home of cow shit and delicious airport pancakes.

He truly is lost.

Truly.

channelbottom

But hey! The city’s founder, Mr Edward Chino invented the favouritest semi-casual trousers of office / retail workers in the solar system.

Shampoo Poo

Ah yes…the Chino pant.

Loose on the hips, tight on leg.

Just like prison.

channelbottom

The eighties owe their life to chinos.

regularguy

Ashton Goggins voiceovers be like: “Matt Biolos, the iconoclastic, iconoclasting, iconoclast, shaper to a number of iconoclasmic, iconochloric, iconoclisms.”

Dung beetle

Fuck I wanted to say this the minute I saw where the article was heading. He’s the kind of writer than finds out about a word and decides he’s gonna try to use it everywhere.

ricmatic

there’s gotta be a word for that

Billy Hunt

Cock?

Dung beetle

Pretentious?

jimmy

He looks like a man I met at a Taco Bell in Reno who had an almost convincing alien abduction story

channelbottom

Was he kidnapping the aliens himself and submitting them to unwanted probing?

Otto

So when’s Phish hitting the road again.
In the mean time You Enjoy Myself
https://i.ytimg.com/vi/dYOX…

channelbottom

I have never once in my life listened to Phish, and I don’t intend to now.

Just saying.

Rich Marx

It’s Kenny G for people who smoke pot.

Black Rubber

OC Jurgen Klopp – a little more conservative but a bit less German.

truth

Did you see this amazing web site of an old grumpy surfer from the UK? https://www.grumpyoldsurfer…

channelbottom

I don’t like the logo sorry.

truth

kinda like the …lost logo

channelbottom

Naw, the Lost logo has some punchy cohesion, but the one on that website is a mess. No offence if it’s yours.

truth

Haha just kidding mate. Guy lives in a parallel universe of bad taste and uncoolness—a universe which all grumpy locals should be comfy in.

channelbottom

I’m certainly living in a universe of grumpiness, but not bad taste. Restricted means yes.

mine.mine.mine

hilarious… a “grumpy old surfer” selling surfing and promoting surfing.. and.. showing you where to get a forecast… “cunt” in name and action

truth

you kidding? I can’t wait to buy a leash from that web site 😀

JohnsKnees

Matt giving us the “Bi” in Biolas

Is this even a new look for him? Looks that same from the Acid Surf Board clip https://uploads.disquscdn.c…

Brutus

ha why can’t people just be themselves, unless of course they actually they don’t know?

Karl Von Fanningstadt

Fatt’s fine with his new look, but just so he’s clear, he wanted me to forward along this actual photo of him from the day’s shoot. When asked why he sent it, he offered up that he did not want people thinking he intentionally tried to copy Jurgen Klopp’s look (or Chuck Klosterman’s) and that he “is, emphatically, NOT a fucking cocksucking Commie!”
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…

Wiggolly's Paddling Style

You do realise it’s exactly the same as Charlie’s queer eye for the straight guy inspired hair cut don’t ya? Chas has been wearing a beanie so long he’s forgotten he looks like a twink.

Chas Smith

I only wear beanie when I’m ripping pow!

Wiggolly's Paddling Style

Do you need me to upload the photo of you and Derek with the beanie stretched over the back of your head like a crocheted yamaka? Anyway – you are a good sport about the shit I say about you here. Thank you for that.

Chas Smith

I only wear a beanie when I’m ripping pow…. or my arm out of socket!

Karl Myers

Is it a yellow beanie?

channelbottom
diamond chief

Kids of the black hole?

channelbottom

Genius Karl. The shirt.
I take my hat off to you.

diamond chief

Amoeba amoeba amoeba

Gino
ZZ Soft Top

…Karen?

HotRightNow

Yes, either cool mom or bearded church lady.
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…


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