Trouble.
Bootleg booze can get you sick. Bootleg movies can provide an unfortunate cinematic experience not intended by the director. Bootleg music robs Aerosmith of much-deserved royalties but bootleg surf instruction? Well, bootleg surf instruction can get you killed.
San Diego lifeguards, bracing for an epidemic of bootleg surf instruction ahead of the Summer of VAL, issued a stern warning overnight.
“The ocean is inherently dangerous and when you have non-permitted surf instructors — who, again, are not really familiar with the area — that are providing instruction, you are just increasing the chance for a mishap.”
They suggested that VALs should sign up for a surf camp that has an actual storefront as opposed to a Brazilian man standing on the beach waving a flag reading “happy fun surf learn.”
Fines for that Brazilian man will range from $50 for his first offense up to $700 for his third.
Grumpy locals were not asked to paddle around lineups cursing VALs and chasing their instructors around issuing non-actionable but still serious threats, though it should be taken into consideration.
Or maybe we should gather a grumpy local version of The Untouchables, that Eliot Ness led band of misfits and outcasts that brought Al Capone and his bootlegging to heel in the 1930s.
We could call it “Da Hui.
Very cool.
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Aerosmith is one of the worst bands of all time
I reckon most beaches would have a good hiding spot for a ‘hide’ in the dunes. Maybe a bit of sand camo, sea-grass matting, a spotter and you’re good to go. I’m seeing it like the sniper scene in Trainspotting to snipe on proven or suspected VALs with an air rifle. I few good pings would make them less likely to return…
https://www.youtube.com/wat…
What a movie. Do you see the beasht? Do ya have im in yer shites?
Yesh Moneypenny.
As much as I would love to do that, and I have thought about it, in the current atmosphere, you’d probably have the SWAT team down there in a matter of minutes, if someone even saw something that looked like a gun.
P.S.
I’d really like to pick off a few drones.
I think you’d be surprised what a few grumpy locals and a little verbal abuse could do–to get a surf School to move out of your area.
The “happy fun surf learn” flag is so rad. It reminded me of Japanese chandler on Japanese friends from the Simpsons’s t-shirt. It’s say “Reggae Hairstyle, Rock’n’ Roll”
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
I want that tshirt
Is this an April Fools joke like the latest one about the surfboard permits in England ?
Lifeguards have a version of the untouchables called Da Buoy.
Actually, this is one area I would LOVE to see government over-step their bounds and red-tape surf schools out of existence by requiring licenses, comprehensive insurance coverage, beach access fees, water safety certificates and other assorted bureaucratic business killers.
Australia has all that already
1979 @ La Jolla shores 3-4ft windy. My uncle hands me a 12’/100lb log(seemed like) and tells me; “dont get in anyone’s way”.
Does that sound dangerous to these c()nts? Or my friends not telling me how to get out at hospitals when its firing and I was still learning? The world is getting super lame!
On second thought, all these wave tanks in the desert can’t get here soon enough.