Actor and new Malibu local Jonah Hill cements position as “Patron Saint of VALs” with release of first epic surf short!

La dolce decadenza.

I am sitting in the premium lounge in Rome’s Fiumicino airport, very near to Ostia where the great Suburra: Blood on Rome was set, drinking fine espressos, eating miniature hotdogs, listening to Andrew WK, pushing absurd decadence to its absolute and final limit.

Flying soon a changed man.

But before I board, we must revel in actor famous for playing sexless butterballs and new Malibu local Jonah Hill’s transition into the Patron Saint of VALs.

Who could have seen this coming?

But surfing is glorious in this way, perpetually surprising, and now Hill has his own surf short, a necessary accomplishment for any favorite.

Watch.

Enjoy.

La dolce decadenza.

UNCLE JOEY from 88 Surfboards on Vimeo.

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Gabriel and step-daddy Charlie, once a formidable combo, two world titles etc. | Photo: WSL

Brazilian Olympic gold medal favourite Gabriel Medina, who spectacularly split from stepfather-coach after surprise marriage to model last year, throws weight of eight-million Instagram followers behind Free Britney Spears campaign!

A little close to home for two-time world champ… 

The Brazilian two-time world champion and Olympic gold hopeful Gabriel Medina, no stranger to the machinations of the parent-child relationship, has taken to Instagram to support the American singer Britney Spears, who is attempting to wrestle control of her multi-million dollar fortune back from her daddy. 

Twelve years ago, y’see, Britney appeared to go a little nuts, not surprising given the fame, money, muscle studs, and she got thrown into hospital, rehab etc. 

Her ol boy Jamie took on the role of managing the kid, the cash, under a conservatorship ruling where a judge appoints an individual or organization to care for another adult who is deemed unfit to care for themselves or to manage their own finances.

Britney, now thirty-eight years old, with two kids and a Vegas headliner, says she ain’t so crazy anymore and wants control of her life, cash back. The hashtags #FREEBritney is trending, as they say, and Gabriel Medina is very much on the Britney train, perhaps, given his own travails with his own pappy. 

Five months ago we noted the apparent rift between Gabriel and his family after his marriage to actress and model Yasmin Brunet.

Media in Brazil reported that “Neither the surfer nor Yasmin follow Charles Medina and Simone Medina, Gabriel’s stepfather, whom he always called his father, and his mother. The two also stopped participating in the networks of the model and her son” and speculated that parental sadness over losing their lil man, the ol empty nest syndrome, may have driven the split. 

For those who know the Medina family, Charles and Simone would be concerned about their son’s future on the waves. Although Gabriel opened the 20-21 calendar well, with a runner-up in December, they fear the boy’s focus has shifted.

“They have always lived through Gabriel’s career. Imposing discipline, giving strength and controlling everything closely. Now, he is no longer a boy and shares his life with his wife. It is undeniable how passionate they are,” says a friend.

Yasmin and Gabriel met at the beginning of last year and soon went to quarantine together.

The internship ended at a wedding in December in Hawaii. Without the presence of relatives. Charles and Simone are also afraid, according to people close to them, of the type of exposure that the marriage between Gabriel and Yasmin has.

In a brief search on the internet, most news related to the athlete is about the couple and not their profession. At 27, Gabriel Medina, one of the greatest surfers in the world, still has a lot of waves to catch.

“Their fear is that after so much sacrifice, everything will fall apart because of the marriage,” says one of the sources.

Pretty interested to hear readers’ takes on the parent-child relationship.

Like, when do you let go?

When do you let the little creature whom you’ve adored and nurtured and protected since birth make their own mistakes, skate minus helmet, fill their precious lil lungs with vape smoke, experiment with gender and so on?

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Thirty dollars per month to unlock myriad secrets.

Brother of US Olympian John John Florence joins controversial content subscription service “mainly used” by pornographic models and sex workers; promises “raw POV video”!

Dreams fulfilled for thirty dollars per month.

It’s Sunday, in Italy, my Dior suit is crumbled on the floor and it is time to pack and go. Yacht returned to Marina, Med moored in epic fashion, Josh slipping it right between a luxurious catamaran and a luxurious catamaran whilst seasoned captains watched leery then gave earnest nods of approval.

We had to ferry back to the island of Ischia, not nearly as chic, race to the hotel and change for a wedding we had been invited to crash.

Black tie and I was underprepared but at least my Dior is dark blue.

It was a lovely affair, setting sun, warm winds, a five-course meal followed by dancing to a live Italian band, featuring trombone, playing the best of Lionel Ritchie.

La dolce tutta la notte.

An exclusive affair but not as exclusive as OnlyFans, the exciting platform that has received much attention over the past few years for bringing stars directly to the people who want to see them unfiltered.

Famous members include the Coffey sisters, Chris Brown, Chyna Blac and now Nathan Florence, brother of John John.

Florence promises “raw POV video” and much more. 

Will you consider?

La dolce miglioramento delle abilità?

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Hannah Ann Sluss, who once attempted to woo a Bachelor, will be injected into a cast featuring Luke Davis, Anastasia Ashley and more QS-to-low-QS surfers.

World Surf League to play matchmaker on The Ultimate Surfer, injecting castoffs from the popular Bachelor and Bachelorette series into The Surf Ranch!

ABC sets honey trap for surfers!

I watched the sun peek over Ischia, bathing the isle in pink, exactly at the same moment as steam rose from the Bialetti in the galley.

La dolce buon tempismo. 

We had anchored, overnight, in a delicate cove directly under a fine hotel and thermal spa where Andrew, the fine trunk maker, has a cousin getting married and we will drop him here.

I ambled down the companionway, poured a cup and swayed on the gentle rock.

Ah, love.

Is there any finer thing in this whole glorious world?

Michelin-starred meals, grotto swims in perfectly-temperatured water, heeling as the wind pushes forward, tiramisu after Michelin-starred meals are all wonderful things but nothing compared to love and especially the love of a radiant wife?

No there is not and I am the luckiest man in the world having that one thing and could happily survive on that one thing.

I suppose it is wonderful, then, that ABC television has revealed that former Bachelor, Bachelorette, stars will appear on this summer’s The Ultimate Surfer with the purpose of sparking this wonderful love.

Industry blog ScreenRant reports, “The show is about finding the best surfers, but that doesn’t mean there won’t be romance in the air,” and thus Mike Johnson, who was once in the running to be the Bachelor, and Hannah Ann Sluss, who once attempted to woo a Bachelor, will be injected into a cast featuring Luke Davis, Anastasia Ashley and  more QS-to-low-QS surfers.

Johnson has since written a book about his experiences.

Sluss has a robust Instagram presence.

Exciting and will one of our own find their soulmate while living in a trailer right off Kelly Slater’s eponymous artificial wave?

Will Kelly Slater himself be tempted?

La dolce tentazione?

 

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"I'm taking a break indefinitely from the WSL world tour for my own well-being and that of my family." | Photo: Steve Sherman/@tsherms

Olympic gold hopeful and Pipe Master Julian Wilson makes shock decision to draw curtain on pro surfing career, “I’ll be found surfing the points at Noosa on my longboard!”

"I'm returning to my roots."

The Australian Olympian or Irukanji Julian Wilson has lit up Instagram with his shock decision to, well, not exactly retire he says, but draw the curtain on his pro surfing career immediately following the Olympics. 

Wilson, who turns thirty-four in November, is currently rated seventeenth on the tour after a pretty ordinary start to the year, two seventeenths, two ninths and a fifths.

It ain’t exactly the world tour year Wilson was hoping for before the window of opportunity closes for the class of 1988, which also includes South African Jordy Smith.  

“I’m returning to my roots,” Wilson told the WSL. “I’ll be found surfing the points at Noosa on my longboard and I will also be found chasing some fun high-performance waves around Australia. I have a few projects coming to life that I’m really excited about and I’m just really looking forward to take a step back for a little while.

Wilson has orbited the tour since 2011, was a rookie of the year, made Gabriel Medina cry when he beat him in Portugal in 2012, he beat Medina in the final of the Pipe Masters in 2014 and three years later beat Medina to win the 2017 Tahiti Pro. 

Whether or not he comes back as nears forty,  if there’ll even be a tour to come back to or if this sparks an exodus of pro’s from a fading tour, will be revealed over the next year or so.

https://www.instagram.com/p/CRZ3W3xrJ3z/

 

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