It's all in the hips.
It's all in the hips.

Foil king, Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg’s 1400-acre Kauai compound explored in “visually stunning” project that “reflects a broader story of dispossession of Native Hawaiians!”

Gone native.

Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg’s transformation from a pale Silicon Valley drone into the world’s 5th richest man and a “foil king” is truly the story of the decade. That famed Caesar haircut, once synonymous with checking out what some kid you knew in high school was cooking for dinner now rests upon a head that has tamed the very seas.

For who doesn’t instantly picture Zuckerberg floating above the waves, foiling, when one pictures him at all?

Beautiful and the Garden Isle of Kauai must be credited as cocoon wherein the Harvard honorary degree holder entered a worm and exited a butterfly.

Zuckerberg famously purchased a nearly 1400-acre compound a few years ago but what does it look like, inside? What is on that precious land?

Well, Business Insider has some answers in “a visually stunning project showcasing the natural beauty that drew Zuckerberg to the island, Tyler Sonnemaker’s story explains how Zuckerberg’s estate there reflects a broader story of the dispossession of Native Hawaiians. Read on for a Q&A with Tyler, and to check out the project, complete with drone footage, illustrations, maps, and audio pronunciations of Hawaiian phrases.”

Very cool.

The piece also explores how Zuckerberg is “going native” on his land by taking up bow hunting and spear throwing.

Mark Zuckerberg throwing spears

And of course foiling.

Like King Kamehameha himself.

 

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84092, 92673
84092, 92673
4 years ago

Hawaii has fallen.

Leone Solurson
Leone Solurson
4 years ago

Imagine taking on the hate . There is alot worse assholes on the Island, they just don’t have billions. Eggy spoiled rude trash throwing thieving crackheads everywhere. Aloha my ass. Its actually a pretty rare thing on Kauai, outside of the tourist industry.

David
David
4 years ago
Reply to  Leone Solurson

Exactly. The big secret is that “Aloha” really means f… you. Most “locals” are not local, Hawaiian, at all and, unfortunately, with those that are very few are spiritual. The complaint is that while many “locals-including Hawaiian, Japanese, mainland whites and Philippinos) were busy smoking crack and getting drunk and being lazy property values got so high they could no longer afford to buy property. So now they want it for free. Good or bad thing here is most never got past the 3rd grade and can’t even read this article. Zuckerbery didn’t “dispossess” his property from native Hawaiians, he bought it. As a disclaimer here, real Hawaiian and real local can be some of the best people in the world. For those I do apologize.

FL Skunk Ape
FL Skunk Ape
4 years ago

This guy is a fucking clown…

frank
frank
4 years ago

“Welease Woger!”

Pauly Matt War-Shore
Pauly Matt War-Shore
4 years ago

First bail on the foil video is fantastic.

Huli Opu
Huli Opu
4 years ago

Time to strap it on Mr Negatron. It looks like a big NW swell in time for Haleiwa this Black Friday.

Heat draws not visible yet but any Robbo vs JJ or Robbo vs Zeke matchup will sate my lust and crush your dreams.

In case you forgot here’s a couple reminders of JJ @ Haleiwa:

https://www.vanstriplecrown…

NEGATRON
NEGATRON
4 years ago
Reply to  Huli Opu

Mate, I’ve got years of dining left from calling Robbo to win in Mexico.

Billy Hunt
Billy Hunt
4 years ago
Reply to  Huli Opu

Holy cow bells Huli, that’s the closest thing to actual surf journalism this site has seen since Little Tom left!

Captain Wack
Captain Wack
4 years ago

Mark, here’s the deal. You can keep running your site that causes negative engagement in human society if you:
1. Give back the 1380 acres to the native Hawaiians
2. Move into a tent in Alo Moana Beach Park, and
3. Enter the next Jaws contest
But no matter what, your name will always be pale-faced cunt. Don’t worry it suits you 🙂

Ricky Spanish
Ricky Spanish
4 years ago

I hope he spears himself in the dick

Ricky Spanish
Ricky Spanish
4 years ago
Reply to  Ricky Spanish

Small target though

Sean Connery
Sean Connery
4 years ago

Sadly his way of creating speed on a wake is eerily similar to mine on a wave.

Mapski
Mapski
4 years ago

He should visit a Luakini Heiau.

channelbottom
channelbottom
4 years ago
Reply to  Mapski

He should also make sure to take a few rocks home. Yeah Mark, it’s “Good Luck” trust me.

Dogsnuts
Dogsnuts
4 years ago

Most definitely a front wiper when not employing a groom of the stool.

Huckleberry
Huckleberry
4 years ago

Fuck this guy. Fucking kook to tha max.

JohnsKnees
JohnsKnees
4 years ago

Where would we be if Mark had decided to own a McDonalds franchise rather than going to Harvard?

Much to ponder…

https://www.cnbc.com/2019/0…

Otto
Otto
4 years ago

Once a Raider haircut, always a Raider haircut.

comment image” rel=”nofollow noopener” target=”_blank” title=”https://ml8dx8xgrqnj.i.optimole.com/zqdu3tw-paA1kNQ7/w:1000/h:600/q:77/rt:fill/g:smcomment image“>https://ml8dx8xgrqnj.i.opti…

Pauly Matt War-Shore
Pauly Matt War-Shore
4 years ago
Reply to  Otto

Who the fuck is that? It’s one hundred percent what I imagine you to look like.

Otto
Otto
4 years ago

Man, if I was blessed with looks like that, you think I’d be here chatting with the likes of you?!

astro
astro
4 years ago

That Pauly is the owner of the LV Raaaiiiddderrrs.

Occ Topus
Occ Topus
4 years ago

The falsehoods and dismissability of an article are easily predicted by reading the very first line. In this case “Foil King” being used to describe Zuck tells one all they need to know that this is typical click bait garbage: long on fluff, short on content.

Barrelled
Barrelled
4 years ago
Reply to  Occ Topus

I think that’s the whole point. You seem to get it except the part where you get pissed off about it.

Occ Topus
Occ Topus
4 years ago
Reply to  Barrelled

Not pissed off at all. It’s just tedious, being the rule rather than the exception.

Spam waders
Spam waders
4 years ago
Reply to  Occ Topus

Like wanking it

Karl Von Fanningstadt
Karl Von Fanningstadt
4 years ago

These sort of nothing posts are what make Beach Grit great!…
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…

Chazz Michael Michaels
Chazz Michael Michaels
4 years ago

Is he the worst person in the world? Highly probable.

astro
astro
4 years ago

Fuck face Page and Sergei are right up there.

@surfads
@surfads
4 years ago

Zuck, Elon, Joe Rogan my holy trinity of shitcunt

Mads Naeraa
Mads Naeraa
4 years ago
Reply to  @surfads

Why the Rogan hate? Honest question. (No big fan, but have seen a few very good interviews/podcasts of his).

@surfads
@surfads
4 years ago
Reply to  Mads Naeraa

I dislike him on a personal level on that I find his interview style insufferable. More broadly I think he’s the modern day version of a talkback radio shock jock, peddling lazy but dangerous conspiracy theories to an impressionable audience worldwide. Creating acolytes like Slater

Plus the cunt crows on about how he beat covid. Well fuck if everybody in the world was a million(billion?)aire with unlimited access to first class medical treatment of course we wouldn’t need to be worried.

Fuck him

Abscessed Llama
Abscessed Llama
4 years ago
Reply to  @surfads

Neg’s that rant deserves a badge aka Rogan Monkey!

ValiantScorn
ValiantScorn
4 years ago
Reply to  @surfads

I dont have as much money as him, but I am doing well. Im not worried about “covid” either. So, fuck me!

Disco
Disco
4 years ago

I just realised he’s a fellow goofy. Devastated.

Beef & Beer
Beef & Beer
4 years ago

Nothing says ‘going native’ like a bit of good old fashioned spear chucking.

P.S.
What’s with the ear muffs though ?
They don’t look like exploding tip spears…

astro
astro
4 years ago
Reply to  Beef & Beer

Prolly headphones and mouthpiece so Caesar can order a few more locals into a lifetime of slavery and drudgery so that Caesar can extend them loans that they can’t pay so that Caesar can buy their land for a pittance.

Huckleberry
Huckleberry
4 years ago
Reply to  Beef & Beer

Dude is a total wanker. Seems right he’d have the muffs going.

ps think me calloused thumb hit the dumb downvote button before the reply button
sorry mate, accident.

Barrelled
Barrelled
4 years ago

My eyes hurt now.

Urchin Sepsis
Urchin Sepsis
4 years ago
Reply to  Barrelled

Meta-ass-ti-sized


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