No mention of George Lazenby, a crucial and deliberate misstep.

Controversy explodes in wake of just-wrapped Academy Awards as extreme sport devotees viciously debate the greatest James Bond of all-time: “Daniel Craig is as mongo as you kick!”

Ultra rude.

“The Slap” has dominated news during the past two days, papering over a festering war amongst extreme sport devotees. But you will certainly recall, before the actor Will Smith left his seat to blip the comedian Chris Rock across the mouth, that Tony Hawk, Kelly Slater and Shaun White stood shoulder to shoulder in fresh tuxedos, Slater’s Gucci, and discussed the James Bond franchise.

White brought up the fact that many actors have played the title character over the years, a neat dozen to be exact. Hawk offered up that Roger Moore had his vote as favorite, Slater ran through a handful more leaving off Australia’s George Lazenby, before throwing to White, again, who said it might be impossible to know which Bond actor was the greatest of all-time, or GOAT, leading to the punchline of three GOATs standing there on stage.

The moment might have been forgotten, except skateboarders, surfers and snowboarders began ruthlessly, viciously attacking each other online over which Bond is, in fact, the Slater of Bonds.

Sean Connery appears to be the favorite amongst traditionalists, longboarders, plastic Nash riders, plywood snowboards sans bindings. Roger Moore was most popular amongst those who prefer retro shapes, twin fins etc. Foilers, e-skaters went big for Pierce Brosnan and real surf, skate, snow jocks for Daniel Craig.

The difference of opinion might have been an opportunity for fun discussion but, again, has devolved into the lowest name calling. Coarse and unrefined.

But, now that we’re all together, which Bond do you prefer?

If you say anything other than Connery, you are an ass.

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AI (for ever) .
AI (for ever) .
4 years ago
channelbottom
channelbottom
4 years ago

Idris Elba.

david
david
4 years ago

Alan. He didn’t just screw the girls, he screwed everyone including the Americans in a sailing race

Kama'aina
Kama'aina
4 years ago

I would say that Brosnan’s greatest role has been the surf adjacent homie to the surf stars and rich home owner of Kauai. Pure acting genus getting the local heavies to kiss his ass while pricing them out of their home town.

Sean Connery
Sean Connery
4 years ago

Thanks Brother

Jimmy the Saint
Jimmy the Saint
4 years ago

Dalton was the best, unfortunately they replaced him with Pierce Brosnan from Navan, County Meath, a real shithole of a town in the Irish midlands. Impossible to take Bond seriously considering he was from Navan, fucking kip! However Navan is more famous for being the birthplace of Francis Beaufort (1774 – 1857), who developed the Beaufort Scale of wind force. Surf adjacent! And Brosnan did some tow surfing in one of his shite Bond movies.

Barrelled
Barrelled
4 years ago

With respect for the last sentence, no comment.


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