In lieu of professional surfing, World Surf League turns to tried-and-true bush planting in Western Australia to burnish legendary greenwashing bonafides and provide adjacent entertainment for starved masses!

Make or Break.

There was no professional surfing for you yesterday or the day before, for that matter. Today? Only Senior Vice President of Tours, Head of Competition Jessi Miley-Dyer knows for certain, and maybe her stoolies at propagandist organ Surfline, but no worries. Bushes are being planted at, or near, event site Margaret River by top seeds.

Current world number two Kanoa Igarashi was there holding a trowel. World number four Lakey Peterson, too, with small palm in presumably compostable container. Conner Coffin, just below the cut line at 23 and dreaming of the 805, had two small succulents. Very Santa Barbara.

Per the release:

Visitors know and love the Margaret River region – tucked in the rugged south-west corner of Australia – for its incredible coastline, amazing surfing breaks, spectacular granite and limestone cliffs, unique wildflowers and orchids, towering forests, and marine life.

However, increasing use of the coast by the growing number of residents and tourists, together with other threats associated with climate change, are placing significant pressures on the fragile coastal region. That’s why the World Surf League has decided to help put the spotlight on caring for the coastline of this much-loved location on surfing’s elite tour.

Before the Margaret River Pro started, a group of athletes from both the men’s and women’s tour took part in a hands-on coastal conservation activation event. The world’s best surfers were joined by youngsters from the local Cowaramup Bay Boardriders Club, who lent a hand with the dune brushing and planting. They replanted native coastal species and undertook some vital dune brushing, which involves laying down branches across sections of dune to prevent people walking in the area and to protect vegetation whilst it establishes.

Gorgeous but if metaphor, which professional surfers are the branches laid down to prevent people from waking and which are the…

…heck. I don’t even know anymore. A trowel? This performative business ranks far above my new role in life as balletomane.

Maurice Cole?

Help?

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Low wide stinkbug stance
Low wide stinkbug stance
4 years ago

They just aren’t very good at this shit are they.

Do they really think the public are so stupid as to put this down as a plus for the environment but not think of all the associated air travel and petroleum based surfboards that go along with the tour?

If they had balls they would go fully carbon neutral, but how to do that when each pro rides what, 100 boards a year?

Z Knows
Z Knows
4 years ago

Who’s the girl wearing glasses?

Hippy
Hippy
4 years ago
Reply to  Z Knows

cunts won’t answer and the principles are gay.

Board Barnacle
Board Barnacle
4 years ago
Reply to  Hippy

Local landcare representative or doing community service?

Hippy
Hippy
4 years ago
Reply to  Board Barnacle

seems like penance for crimes.

Party Pete
Party Pete
4 years ago

Into the blue again, after the wozzles gone.

Corey Webster
Corey Webster
4 years ago

Got a great new show idea from this article-“Chas Smith: Deputy Sheriff, Greenwash Police”.

disqus_00d1gIXedO
disqus_00d1gIXedO
4 years ago

Dune brushing has been a staple of mother nature’s natural rhythms for so long now. Almost as long as desert combing. I’m glad some of the most unskilled-on-land humans but massively-internationally-privileged skilled waveriders lended their respective hands to this gang-wank.

Lorlac
Lorlac
4 years ago

Of course Conner is there.

Capt Sensible
Capt Sensible
4 years ago

Just for a starter a judging stand set up in the highley sensative dunes in front of the box , 6 jet skis ‘ a helicopter , a huge boat and event sight lighting running 24/7 yea yea WSL what ever.

AI (for ever) .
AI (for ever) .
4 years ago
Reply to  Capt Sensible

I wonder if they actually believe it themselves or if they just think everyone in the world is so stupid not too see what a full on wank it all is?

Gil Gunderson
Gil Gunderson
4 years ago

Fantastic foresight from the woz in preparing surfers for life after the tour. A volunteer role at their local landcare, working for the dole. Living the dream.

channelbottom
channelbottom
4 years ago

Agreed. Cut down all the trees because “they’re messy” and then name all the streets after them.

Make sure to max out your house lot with the largest, most soulless house possible. Avoid planting anything but grass. Buy the largest truck possible and park it across the footpath.

Hippy
Hippy
4 years ago

Anyone? Who is the lass with the glasses to the left of Lakey in the photo…. next to the tall guy?

FelipesFrontFoot
FelipesFrontFoot
4 years ago
Reply to  Hippy

Some sweet goddess I would love to disappoint.

StarJamma
StarJamma
4 years ago

Looks like Connor is holding sea-fig, a non-native succulent from South Africa (Jordy!) that is invasive in and near beaches in a lot of Mediterranean climates. Seems about right.

channelbottom
channelbottom
4 years ago
Reply to  StarJamma

Australia also has a couple of natives: Carpobrotus glaucescens AKA Pigface is the most commonly known one in the eastern half of Aus. Over in WA it’ll most likely be C. virescens.

StarJamma
StarJamma
4 years ago
Reply to  channelbottom

Thanks! Well, now I know the future IS bright in the WSL’s hands!!

channelbottom
channelbottom
4 years ago
Reply to  StarJamma

You misspelled ‘shite’.

Board Barnacle
Board Barnacle
4 years ago
Reply to  StarJamma

It takes someone special to make a succulent look intelligent and yet here we are.

StarJamma
StarJamma
4 years ago
Reply to  Board Barnacle

“Connor, please put it down now. We’re done filming.”

“I can’t. She tells me to hold her near my face, so she can talk to me. She wants to tell me how to beat Filipe.”

*Puts sea-fig closer to face*

“What’s that? It’s time?? To unleash…..the Turn????”

FL Skunk Ape
FL Skunk Ape
4 years ago

So much planting, the best planting, the biggest planting.

@surfads
@surfads
4 years ago

@paulymattwarshaw can you do one replacing Connor’s head with the plants, so he is a plant holding up two of his heads

Pauly Matt War-Shore
Pauly Matt War-Shore
4 years ago
Reply to  @surfads

Low-res image, but I did my best.

https://uploads.disquscdn.c…

notsurfingtoday
notsurfingtoday
4 years ago

Re-connor the bush

@surfads
@surfads
4 years ago

lol

Gino
Gino
4 years ago

Guy on the left….ya ain’t gonna be planting many trees with your hands on your hips.

Stick man
Stick man
4 years ago
Reply to  Gino

Looks like Kolohe Durbidge…

ricmatic
ricmatic
4 years ago

Bushes are being planted at, or near, event site Margaret River by top seeds.
Sick gardening joke.

Stick man
Stick man
4 years ago
Reply to  ricmatic

Yeah Japanese Maples, Connifers, and they use water from the Lakey just a few Miley’s away…

@surfads
@surfads
4 years ago
Reply to  ricmatic

Try as they might, they just can’t avoid the seeding round.

Derek Hynd's Missing Fins
Derek Hynd's Missing Fins
4 years ago

No pic from the WSL of the log Griffin planted in the lineup?

Stick man
Stick man
4 years ago

Kelly Slater Chia Pet?

Jimmy the Saint
Jimmy the Saint
4 years ago

Planting land mines would work better!

astro
astro
4 years ago

The Wall hard at work …

Ricky Spanish
Ricky Spanish
4 years ago

Conner practicing for next career step?

Sellme fitzgobbins
Sellme fitzgobbins
4 years ago

Meanwhile there is a massive 5 star resort and high end residential development planned for the very same headland ,Marriot by the sound of it , think Hanalei bay style ,all the bushes and succulents ,not to mention cute little endangered ringtail possums and carnaby cockatoos will all be rendered homeless ( or dead more likely ) and I’ll bet my bottom dollar all these pro surfers will be staying there in the future .
Preserve Gnarabup .con

Randommargslocal
Randommargslocal
4 years ago

lefties down here only care about this shit if it ruins their view of the surf from their range rovers.

does anyone care about the thousands of hectares of old growth jarrah being destroyed by the alcoa mine north of here? no. because it’s not in a gentrified area full of people rolling around in brand new cars, living off inflated asset prices while people can’t afford to rent in town. performative wankers.

Sellme fitzgobbins
Sellme fitzgobbins
4 years ago

Wow ,great attitude ,let’s support perthy developers trash the coast so we can get even with the rich on the hill?

Sellme fitzgobbins
Sellme fitzgobbins
4 years ago
Sellme fitzgobbins
Sellme fitzgobbins
4 years ago

Kind of like this on what is still pristine coastal heath

Ramathorn
Ramathorn
4 years ago

Sneaky cunts aye. To save the environment, they ban regenerative native logging in SW WA and ramp up pine plantations – the caveat being when clearing for mines is needed. WSL / WA gov partnership is made in heaven

disqus_00d1gIXedO
disqus_00d1gIXedO
4 years ago

You should probably chillax and go dune brushing and shrub planting. If not, a nice cool green wash will serve you well

munnstrosity
munnstrosity
4 years ago

low.con.denom
experts in window dressing


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