Ten hours of competition and four competitors eliminated, three wildcards and poor Seth Moniz.
We’ve had two days of competition at Margaret River already, three if you’re counting both men and women, more than ten solid hours of competitive surfing on the men’s side, and what are we left with?
Elimination of Jack Thomas, Ben Spence, Jacob Wilcox and Seth Moniz.
Two surfers we’ve never heard of and might not again. One whom we recognise as a previous early exiting wildcard, and poor Seth Moniz.
(See yesterday’s piece for explanation of the latter.)
The most interesting contribution that Jacob Wilcox made was “words” with Zeke Lau in the morning warm up, following a drop-in and a flicked board from Zeke.
The idea that the number of surfers in each event needs to decrease is a firmly beaten drum. I’ve always quite liked the variety of surfers, styles and talents and felt a diverse field was more interesting, but I have to concede this is dead wrong.
As surfers we venerate the stylists and the specialists, but competition is competition. Talent matters, but winning mentalities matter more.
It has also been strikingly apparent recently that the selection of wildcards needs to be better. It’s not consistent, nor effective. Some are chosen by sponsors, some by the WSL, but few are successful in heats. For the most part, you can safely pencil them in to exit at the earliest possible opportunity.
If a wildcard is to be granted let’s try and make it worthwhile. The idea of the local wildcard is lovely and romantic, but rarely lives up to the potential. Pipe specialists excepted.
Wildcards need to be chosen more carefully, more Barron Mamiya than Mikey Wright. More Jay Davies than Jack Thomas. If a wildcard is not a genuine threat they’re simply useless fodder that sucks away meaningful competition time.
So anyway, thankfully the comp starts now.
What do we think of the forecast? Conclusion of the women’s today, perhaps, followed by a couple of lay days waiting for the next swell?
More Main Break at the beginning of next week?
Or perhaps The Box this weekend?
Any Margaret River aficionados below the line please fill us in.
Regardless, it looks like waves ahead and some more key decision making for Jesse Miley-Dyer. Given recent events, they are perhaps decisions that could be decisive in whether or not she remains in a job that has looked less and less tenable.
You might say it’s make or break time. In fact, my guess is they’ll sack her anyway because it’s good TV.
What do you like in the round of 32?
The match-ups change complexion depending on where they surf, of course, and keen-eyed gamblers will be taking note of this. (Remember when Jack Robinson was matched against Filipe with the latter as a heavy favourite according to bookmakers? These are the opportunities a bold man might retire on.)
I’ll enjoy the all Aussie battler match-up between Callum Robson and Morgan Ciblic in H3. Ciblic, of course, needs the win if we’re to see him again.
Two all American boys face off in H4 in with Coffin vs Colapinto. Conner needs the victory to avoid the cut, but given recent form he must be wishing it was a spelling bee rather than a surf comp.
Italo vs Joao Chianca in H7 looks like a potential banger. Keep a close eye on this one. It’s the kind of heat where the presiding narrative might lead to some unconscious judging bias. Everyone believes Joao belongs on Tour, and Italo is the emerging villain.
What drama might we see in a close heat? Don’t be surprised if Joao pips him at the post. Stand by for more dazzling bejeweled rage in the aftermath.
I like the look of the goofy match-up with Miguel Pupo vs Owen Wright in H8. Owen needs the win. Is he a man campaigning for The Box?
Jadson needs to beat Kelly in H13 to have any chance of staying on Tour. He’s been here before. Don’t bet against him.
Then it’s a tasty battle of the power brokers in H14 with Jordy vs Zeke. Expect full rail gouges and mean mugging.
Zeke needs the win, Jordy almost as much. A quarter final defeat in Portugal is far and away Jordy’s best result of the season to date. He’s a man who should be aiming for the top and he’ll need to put his foot down quick.
I’m all in, as they say.
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TRUE but do we really want to know what those rednecks are doing with the cream?
Jacob can get his old man to sort out the Hawaiian , he fights all his sons fights anyway.
Awe man. Fooled me. He still needs optics an that carbine tho.
Is JMD still dating Courtney ? If so with her still the draw isn’t that a bit of a conflict of interest ? Sort of been glossed over hasn’t it for the last couple years …
Now this is the narrative we need!
True?
Pics or it didn’t happen.
Wasnt renato hickel boning lisa anderson?
I am always willing to pursue real world data for the benefit of mankind or womankind
Waahhh, Mommy! the big bad Hawaiian flicked his board at me. He’s so scary with all his mean tattoos!
What a bunch of fuckin pussies. Grow the fuck up you pasty misogynist racist keyboard kooks. You wouldn’t last 5 minutes in Hawaii. Go suckle Rielly’s cock. This boring-ass contest could use some good beatdowns and dirty lickins.
Racist? An arsehole is an arsehole mate. Mean tattoos? A pissy collar rocker with font so small you can’t even read it? Fuck outta here.
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
Zeke really occupies a large space in your mind eh Pauly? I expect better from you. Or are memes your only strong suit?
He occupies a small space in my mind when he acts like an entitled arsehole with double standards, then I forget about him just as quickly. Not sure why you’d go into bat for him when he’s clearly in the wrong. Parochialism?
Find your calm space Pauly https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
Don’t try to de-escalate this by making me horny. It will work.
holy fuck he’s keen.
Christ Pauly stop your edits. I can’t keep up.
I’m no fan of Zeke. He rubs even locals the wrong way and he’s not the most likeable guy but I find all the Zeke hate here funny and revealing
and yet, it’s not that revealing. i dislike him because he’s a petulant, crybaby dickhead. not because he’s hawaiian. spare us your silly racial hot takes, brah. do you see a lot of hate here for seth? imai? barron?
Aww come’on bunbo. He’s really just a big cuddly bear who likes rainbows and cheezits. He’s been known to pet stray cats too.
The edits are cos I’m not articulate at this time of the morning, all jacked up on painkillers and benzos.
Not to worry. I hope you’re feeling better.
Negs is prolly laughing now cause I told him that I’d stop posting to BG. That didn’t last long hey
Sorry I didn’t reply, But Ive had quite a few cry-time emails like yours over the years.
Tell Rielly I want my frikin’ tee shirt.
“not the most likeable guy”… Very revealing…. racist
Some dem Hawaiian dudes start beleiving they as tuff everywhere else as dey is in da Islands…but even Sunny got a beatdown when he tried to road rage on some NorthSide Longos near the LBC. And I mean a beatdown and he admitted it too. Don’t need to play alpha everywhere ya go, especially in SoCal urban hoods.
Hoping Sunny gets better one day. He ended up being a good dude when you got know him. Feel bad for Schmoo’s family too.
Fuck yes Huli, I’m no hard guy but I love a good scrap. Surfin needs more pricks, used to be no shortage of em.
Here’s some classic live Metheny from 1993 to start your day bruddah ric
Even when he plays gtr synth it sounds like him, rare air.
Shouldn’t you be bashing someone’s head in?
What? During my afternoon tea?
Yuk
It’s over yer head peasant
Good
Classic ECM jazz. Love it.
sweet guitar
I agree that a gentlemanly açai bowl-smashing duel upon the sands would be a tip-top way to settle such matters, rather than a potential blood-letting in Noah’s realm.
TALLY HO GOOD SIR!!!!
Fuck mate… using the Hawaiian mentality towards outsiders, Zeke shouldn’t have been allowed anywhere near the peak at Margs, only taking waves that the Margaret River locals followed Australians didn’t want and should have been bashed to a pulp on the sand by at lease 10 cunts after that fuckery. Hawaiians are a fucking disgrace when abroad. Aloha goes both way.
The tape had been zaprudered on utube. Wilcox took off on Zeke after Zeke bottom turned around cocks as he waited in the foam to drop in behind Zeke. People that do this move and then claim the wave can just fuck off in my mind. Small beating for small infraction. Did I say the right thing scary Hawaiian tough guy?
🤣
So can anyone tell us exactly what happened with Zeke and Jacob? I’m 100 percent sure that it was 100 percent Zeke’s fault, as he is 100 percent a fucken shit cunt, but I would dearly love to know the cunty story.
So there’s a rundown on stab about it. Turns out that yes, Zeke was the shit cunt being shit.
Zeke is proud of the fact that the WSL created the “excessive hassling” rule specifically because he acts like a douche.
do share the details
I refuse to go to Stub to view it. Please do share details.
Tuesday/Wednesday finish WA time. Tuesday is way too big for Box and has some mean winds that could fall on the side of up-the-face, wednesday looks like it could be primo box conditions, buut will the WSL really run finals aka heats of consequence at The Box? I don’t know. In fact this whole write up is a complete guess, I live nowhere near Aus nor have I ever been.
Tuesday Seabreeze calls pretty strong SSE but swell 3m [SW]…BoM say more like 5m swell, which is pretty big! Big Lefts at Mainbreak??
I’m hoping there’ll be some repercussions for old zekey boy. give him another reason to scowl more.
h13 cabra macho v the goat…
See above as I have a small sample size to confirm the assertion of stink free poop
If the WSL truly wants to improve interest in competitive surfing, while dramatically increasing topline sponsor revenue, they will add a WWE style cage to the beach festivities so competitors can settle any lingering issues in the cage. Vegas and online betting(including kinky sex addict Dave Portnoy) will jump in as well!
When you come to da islands we demand respect. We we come to your islands we show no respect. Aloha means hypocrit.
It was tedious viewing. The absurdity that professional surfing is going to take off on the back of a tv serious is wishful thinking at best. Sadly the surfers seem to believe that they are about to become minor celebrities, a bit like singers who get past the first audition in an American Idol type show. Only to realize later, that in the grand scheme of things they are nobodies!
Other than that Kelvin Slattery guy can most people name a big time surfer?
Zuckerberg
I said surfers not a tranny!
Whoever I put on my fantasy team will be wrong. I just know it.
And Kaipo WINS the whole thing, go figure.
Hawaiians think their shit doesn’t stink.
Based upon some of the hottie Hawaiian(incl new local haoles) girl’s salads I’ve tossed over the years I’d say there is some truth that their poop doesn’t stink…
Really hoping Chumbinho beats Italo and gets a result at Margs so he makes the cut. Also curious to see what (if any) result Italo’s pressure on the judges at Bells will affect the judging on such a big heat.
Can’t wait for the cut, man. All these heats is such a waste of time. The ladies 2 heats of elimination felt like it dragged on for 2 hours.
I’m thinking that the coyote who attacked the kid at HB should get a permanent Wild Card.
I think you are over thinking it.
All they have to do is chop a grand total of 4 surfers from the tour.
Still allows for 2 wildcards. The sponsors demand it and its not much of a price to pay.
Instead of top 34 you make it top 30 (like it used to be!), add 2 wildcards for a 32 man field ,effectively starting in rd 3, and presto, just saved 16 pointless heats from being run.
Do this and you no longer have to run early rounds in shit because the forecast looks bad.
You don’t even need to chop surfers. Just chop that stupid fucking 2nd round shit. It’s like little kiddy participation awards now with no elimination 1st round. Fuck that. If you come last in a 3 man heat then fuck off. That’s 12 surfers gone after 1 round.
Rd. 2 you’ve got 24 surfers. 8 x 3 man heats. More guys catching waves. Again, last place can fuck off. Another 8 cut.
20 blokes gone in 2 rounds. Problem solved.
Yeah interesting idea and i dont mind it. Your way takes 20 hrats to whittle the field down to 16, my way takes only 16 heats. 2 hours of surfing.
My way is bit of a cunt for the bottom seed. Youre basically screwed.
Yeah I guess coz your way has fewer surfers to start with. As I said in some other post, cut the seedings as well. It’s geared against the bottom guys. Just throw ‘em all in a hat for the first 2 rounds of 3 man heats
Good point
The gambling angle is unfortunately not available in my endlessly mocked state of Florida yet, how do I subvert this stultifying oppression?
use a vpn and gamble somewhere else? pretty sure he’d still be illegal, but hey, you’re asking!
It’s cliched to say so, but don’t start. Not unless you have a clear-eyed perspective of your own character, you’re unemotional, patient, and disciplined.
I’ve been following the rise of sports betting in some parts of the US. America is heading for a gambling epidemic. Mark my words.
I deeply appreciate your concern for my well being but that should be my irrational, impulsive, irresponsible decision, not the fucking government.
That’s wise advice…way back, I used to get 100% certainty tips [for a place] from the hookers who looked after the Jockeys. The nice man at the TAB looked me in the eye after my 3rd or 4th bet and told me he didn’t want to see me come back into his shop. One of the rare times I’ve taken good advice from an elder.
Play poker instead