Owen Wright (pictured) headless but happy.
Owen Wright (pictured) headless but happy.

Hurricane Kay to possibly destroy wave quality during World Surf League Final’s Day, according to official forecast partner, leaving surfers decapitated by “mid-season cut” to wonder if karma is real!

Putting the K in Karma.

The World Surf League’s much-ballyhooed Final’s Day is but hours away and, thus, Surfline, the official forecast partner, has released its calculation.

Usually cocksure in predicting never-before-seen, historically-significant, twenty-foot-plus swells with other ideal conditions ahead of each tour stop, Surfline has gone noticeably tepid in front of Trestles, declaring, “Hurricane Kay a major wildcard for waves, wind and weather Thursday – Sunday,” adding “uncertainty exists on exact details for wind speed and direction” even though Thursday and Friday will see “7 foot sets.”

The prognosis only extends through September 12 with the waiting period lasting all the way to the 16th and so all is not lost but surfers decapitated by the controversial “mid-season cut,” rolled out for the first time this year, must be wondering if “Kay” actually stands for “Karma.”

The pop interpretation of the Hindu belief posits that future beneficial effects are drawn from past beneficial actions but most vindictive westerners really enjoy the darker side of nasty effects drawn from nasty actions.

Walk an old lady across a street, win the lottery, sure, but deprive professional surfers of their livelihood, cop a hurricane, better.

What are your thoughts on eastern religious philosophy, in general, and how it pertains to the World Surf League, specifically?

Discuss at length.

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channelbottom
channelbottom
4 years ago

Meh

tim_nelsen
tim_nelsen
4 years ago

orange county archives: local geologist/oceanographer captures bathymetry of San Leonardo Creek (google hurlruherluy for stickers) undated photo

https://assets.redrocksonli…

janeausten
janeausten
4 years ago

7 foot waves do not exist. It’s 1-2 foot, 3 foot, 4-5 foot, 6-8 foot etc

Gil Gunderson
Gil Gunderson
4 years ago
Reply to  janeausten

What about small, overhead and pretty big?

Pauly Matt War-Shore
Pauly Matt War-Shore
4 years ago
Reply to  janeausten

Five foot exists?

channelbottom
channelbottom
4 years ago
Reply to  janeausten

BLASPHEMER!!!

THE GERMAN MALE LOWER LEG REIGNETH SUPREME UNTO THE MEASUREMENTH OF WAVESTHTHTH!!!

Cannabis-Creativity
Cannabis-Creativity
4 years ago

Good find. I missed that the 1st time.

samwaters
samwaters
4 years ago

Haha, what a stupid way to run a sporting event.
Can’t even let the fans know what day it’s gonna be on so they can plan ahead, (call in sick).

Other sports–1pm sharp on Saturday, no ifs ands or butts, ( if it’s raining we’ll just close the roof).
Surfing–well, maybe, Thursday, or Friday or Saturday–but we still have to wait for first light, to see what it looks like and which way the winds blowing before we can tell you for sure that it’s on.
Sure way to get a big world audience.
Not!

I guess surfing was maybe just never meant to be a dignified sport.

Chazz Michael Michaels
Chazz Michael Michaels
4 years ago
Reply to  samwaters

How lucky you don’t care about it!

Twinnie
Twinnie
4 years ago

“7 foot sets” Should be the slogan for the WSL.

janeausten
janeausten
4 years ago
Reply to  Twinnie

sorry, I missed this, should have added below as my comment…to reiterate, there is no such thing as a 7 foot wave.

Board Barnacle
Board Barnacle
4 years ago
Reply to  Twinnie

Or 3 German lower legs.

Gino
Gino
4 years ago

WWJD
What would Jonah do?

Waterproof Polo
Waterproof Polo
4 years ago
Reply to  Gino

Eat a cheeseburger and the vomit. It’s the Malibu way.

Wotusay
Wotusay
4 years ago

As Bodhisatva is believed to have said, “Why are you always looking to me for answers, when those answers are within you, unless you’re stupid. And if you are stupid, life is full of irony.”

Cannabis-Creativity
Cannabis-Creativity
4 years ago

Soon we will all be Chinese Buddhists. The Japanese want to be American while the Chinese seek to destroy us…in surf competition if not global politics. They are disciplined and driven, moreso than Jack Robinson. And really good in small surf, per Felipe. Meet the (eventual) new boss.
https://youtu.be/WzkGalX_vQ4

Michael Flatlately
Michael Flatlately
4 years ago

Only if you believe the ‘pictures from Space.’

Michael Flatlately
Michael Flatlately
4 years ago

I remember an impasse with a Balinese taxi driver who didn’t understand my question about getting angry at other driver’s antics. I thought it was the language barrier, but I think he just genuinely didn’t understand the notion of anger with another’s actions. Remarkable. But aspirational? Well, their infrastructure is rooted and corruption is rife, so perhaps there’s great benefits to anger and this-life retribution. Also, I remember being chased down the road by an angry extended family for reneging on a Bintang tee negotiation. In other news, I think the family Florence is about to score Florence XL Fiji. Perhaps some fine-worthy edits.

Derek Hynd's Missing Fins
Derek Hynd's Missing Fins
4 years ago

Any odds you’ll be in Indo end of this month, or again in October?

Michael Flatlately
Michael Flatlately
4 years ago

Slim. The kind of odds JP would bet his child’s education on. You goin?

Derek Hynd's Missing Fins
Derek Hynd's Missing Fins
4 years ago

Popping my cherry. A little intimidated, tbh. Only surfed reefs a few times in my life, and I hate crowds, too.

Michael Flatlately
Michael Flatlately
4 years ago

Oh yew! Nice one. Enjoy. The crowds will be insane, but boardies and only concerns the swell might get too big (solid 7 foot +), you can’t top that. Some notes: There is no natural water source on the Bukit, so all the places out there are an affront. The advice to ‘smile and be friendly’ to the locals has typically come from good looking, talented surfers. For the average to poor in ability and looks, beware. Many of the women who look like they are learning and therefore highly burnable, are surfing with paid local very unburnable guides.

Lemon Next to the Pie
Lemon Next to the Pie
4 years ago

Best advice I can give you is head away from Bali. Reefs aren’t too bad. For the most part you can choose where you are paddling into the wave and decide where is too heavy and where isn’t. The waves are more predictable.

Lombok is a short hop away and has fun waves without anywhere near as many kooks/crowds. Plenty of good places to stay and eat. My last trip there, I landed in Bali, had one shitty surf with a crowd at Airport Lefts, jumped the boat to G-Land for 6 days, came back to 2 shitty days in Bali, went to Lombok for 5 days. Lombok was the highlight.

Derek Hynd's Missing Fins
Derek Hynd's Missing Fins
4 years ago

Thanks! Yeah just 3 days 2 nights in Bali and that will be it. Have to do it for seeing Bi more than anything else. Def will go other spots in the future. Good to hear about Lombok. Malaria a concern there?

Lemon Next to the Pie
Lemon Next to the Pie
4 years ago

I was never any more concerned with malaria there than Bali. The one I was more aware of was Dengue, which is less likely in Lombok than Bali due to being on the good side of the Wallace line.

Lemon Next to the Pie
Lemon Next to the Pie
4 years ago

Ahhh, sorry about delay. Last weeks of term and no time to play internet games….

Not really a problem in Lombok. Because it’s dryer, mosquitos aren’t anywhere near the problem they are in Bali/the west of Lombok. The Wallace line is the point that the monsoon rains don’t pass too often and it just so happens to pass in between Bali and Lombok. Well, you could argue that the southern part of Bali is also on the other side as well…

Tom
Tom
4 years ago

“I am groot??” and “I am groot!!!!”

channelbottom
channelbottom
4 years ago
Reply to  Tom

Massive tool Massive tool Massive tool Massive tool Massive tool!

Little Richard
Little Richard
4 years ago

I prefer to envision Coomer, Cibs, Chinky and the other losers feverishly masterbating in a circle on the fabled cobblestones of Lower Trestles. An anti-swell ceremony. Sorrow in their eyes for what could have been yet anger in their chanting and howling for what their curse will bestow upon finals day. Verbally and physically encouraging each other until completion. Very shortly, the WSL will too have a soggy biscuit it will have to swallow.

Barrelled
Barrelled
4 years ago

Only thoughts on religion and wozzle are no thoughts whatsoever. They both seem to exist for those who can’t figure things out for themselves.

astro
astro
4 years ago

When the going gets tough, the tough get going.
LFG!!!!

velobwoy
velobwoy
4 years ago
Reply to  astro

LMB

toofattosurf
toofattosurf
4 years ago
Reply to  velobwoy

…wheres lgr?

channelbottom
channelbottom
4 years ago
Reply to  toofattosurf

Working hard he says. No time for the silly bidness of BG currently.

toofattosurf
toofattosurf
4 years ago
Reply to  channelbottom

working is silly…

channelbottom
channelbottom
4 years ago
Reply to  toofattosurf

I know. Such a common and filthy thing to do.

Hold on, I need to call my butler to have him scratch my arse…

@surfads
@surfads
4 years ago

Being is nothingness, nothingness is being, and Surfline just said there will be ‘7 foot sets’

Time for humans to dissolve their ego self and fold as one back into the primordial soup from whence we came.

John Non John
John Non John
4 years ago
Reply to  @surfads

What is time?

@surfads
@surfads
4 years ago
Reply to  John Non John

It’s ahh.. ten past nine, mate.

Gumby's Left Nut
Gumby's Left Nut
4 years ago
Reply to  John Non John

42

Disco
Disco
4 years ago
Reply to  @surfads

Fuck. When will those surfline Kook’s realise they get instant Kook status when they say 7 foot. We have cultural rules that our elders established way back in yesteryear. It’s either
flat
1ft
1-2
2-3
2-4
3-4
3-5
now we go even’s only for a bit…
4-6
6-8
8-10
10-12
beyond that it doesn’t really matter but if you’re asking…
12-15
15-20
20+

F Scott Fitzbarrelled
F Scott Fitzbarrelled
4 years ago
Reply to  Disco

7 foot just feels wrong eh? Who ever heard of a 7 foot wave? Doesn’t Smurfline know the rules?

Warshaw’s History of Surfing book (thanks for the gift wifey!) makes the same point re: our culture’s odd wave height scaling convention.

Chazz Michael Michaels
Chazz Michael Michaels
4 years ago
Reply to  Disco

Knee, chest, head, overhead, double-overhead.

Lemon Next to the Pie
Lemon Next to the Pie
4 years ago

Quadruple-overhead, brown-wetsuit sized…

F Scott Fitzbarrelled
F Scott Fitzbarrelled
4 years ago

Hear hear, but what if you’re bodysurfing? Everything is overhead!

Wildcambodia
Wildcambodia
4 years ago
Reply to  Disco

12 to 15 isn’t a thing…

martillo
martillo
4 years ago
Reply to  Disco

East coast the other day – it’s literally 1/2 knee high slop and the MoMos call it waist high even chest. These same MoMos will be looking for something else to do this weekend when hurricane Earl swell is head high+.

disqus_00d1gIXedO
disqus_00d1gIXedO
4 years ago
Reply to  @surfads

805

Picard Madeoff
Picard Madeoff
4 years ago

I’ve planned my entire life around finals day…how will I cope if it is anything short of Code Red?

channelbottom
channelbottom
4 years ago
Reply to  Picard Madeoff

All your life,
you were only waiting,
for this moment to arrive.

https://youtu.be/TREsFhJbPrY

Picard Madeoff
Picard Madeoff
4 years ago
Reply to  channelbottom

If only I still had the massive rolling paper from inside the sleeve of the Cheech and Chong album to roll up right now and fire up while listening to this gem!


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