“I am confident that these changes will set us on the path to achieving our goals and creating a more agile company."
Thirty-two days to the observance of Christ’s birthday, when a magic wand is waved over this dirty dirty world making everything softer and more beautiful.
Or as the wise say,
“One of the more glorious messes in the world is the mess created in the living room on Christmas Day. Don’t clean it up too quickly.”
Am I feeling a little sentimental?
Salty prints under the eyes?
Yeah, and why not, life ain’t always about staring into the maroon eyes of a big-hearted tranny as your thighs quiver in violent orgasmic release, sweat glistening on her man-made tits..
Anyway, good times, the best times, and who don’t love Christmas?
Well, for sixty Boardriders Inc employees on Australia’s Gold Coast, once ground zero for the mighty Billabong empire, founded in 1973 by master shaper Gordon Merchant and his wife Rena, it’s gonna be a bleak ol’ Yuletide.
As mass sackings continue at Boardriders Inc, the parent company of Quiksilver, Billabong and RVCA, continue across the globe, it’s been revealed sixty of ‘em are coming from the GC.
Boardriders Inc is currently majority owned by Oaktree Capital, an American global asset management firm, but is in the process of being bought, or so we are told, by Authentic Brands Group, “folding them into a robust house that includes Izod, Neil Lane, the licensing rights to Elvis Presley, Marilyn Monroe, Muhammad Ali and many other brands plus personalities.”
The mass layoffs, we are told, are designed to streamline the biz on paper, sharpen the bottom line etc.
“I am confident that these changes will set us on the path to achieving our goals and creating a more agile company suited to adapt to the evolving environment,” Boardriders CEO Arne Arens said in a press release.
Industry insiders told The Gold Coast Bulletin, the sacking were “brutal especially just before Christmas. No one knew who was going to lose their jobs or keep them.”
All evidence, I think, that the sooner you can strike out on your own, whether it’s a plumbing biz or a stupid website mining for clicks, the better.
Loose the yolk, work for no man.
“Loose the yolk” aka lose the yoke. Robots are to blame. They can accomplish 10 times the standing around and looking at their phones that humans can, and in less time.
Going to be a few very nervous mid tier sponsored surfers going arround very shortly.
Shannaon North could see the future thats why he quit to run Dakine/ Xcell and JS in Aust.
Shannon is one of the major partners in the JS brand, he owns shit loads more than JS!
It’s a YOKE, not a yolk. Seriously, learn to speak inggris?
Terrance & Phillip Running The Show…
“Brookfield Asset Management Inc. is a Canadian multinational company that is one of the world’s largest alternative investment management companies, with over US$725 billion of assets under management invests in distressed securities through Oaktree Capital, which it bought in 2019.”
“I’m not your friend, buddy.”
Clearly.
I work in the commodities so have seen a few downturns. Mass layoffs are just there to keep the shareholders (i.e. the investment funds) happy because the bottom line gets improved immediately. Then the CEO walks away with zillion dollar bonus. To hell with productivity or R&D; extra staff can always be hired later. Of course it rewards psychopaths and sociophaths, and is usually completely shortsighted but it is what it is. The trick is to be prescient enough to see it coming.
That’s un Aussie. Just b4 Xmas too. Surf companies no good nowdays owned by overseas by non surf, money peeps. Lost its soul
Seems like longboard shapers and Walmart captured most of the cash influx from covid beginners.
I’m going to save a ton of money on Christmas gifts this year by bringing up Trump at Thanksgiving dinner.
https://youtube.com/clip/Ug…
Jesus wasn’t born on 12/25, so there’s that.
If only there were enough clicks to go around for everyone.
Same goes for TC, who is almost 61yrs old. Just 5 more years til retirement!
ah , news flash….ABG pulled out of negotiations with Oaktree so that’s the VF Corp/ABG and now have a look at Bluestar (Hurley-Lebanese gun runners) , so next!!!
A mind in descent.
Arne Arens is hired late 2021.
Interviewer: “what can you do for us?”
Arne: “I can be the absolute dick who sacks everyone and fuck over their families just in time for Xmas cause I don’t give a flying fuck except for my own portfolio to make the bottom line look good, all the while tossing a bullshit jobs word salad including ‘agile”.
Interview panel: “You’re just the man we are looking for!”
Arne: “Don’t you mean ‘person for the job’?”
Interview panel: “hahahhhahahahahahahahahah FUCK NO! We’re not the woke pretenderati WSL”
Arne: “Phew … OK let’s go fuck ’em up!”
Interview panel: “you are so sexy … hired”
The cull at the WSL will make this look like a storm in a hiccup.
‘Adapt to an evolving environment’ brutal to be on the receiving end of that
Good article. I think this same billionaire (Steve Koltes and his two pals — they own CVC, which owns ABG) owns Vans too, right?
Gis a job then.
Yosser!
Great show, top stuff.