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Slater ain't hanging around in Portugal.

Surf world reeling after Kelly Slater threatens retirement following catastrophic showing in Portugal and reveals the death threats in response to his robust Instagram presence, “Literally, I’ll come find you!”

"The social media thing is sad… it's toxic."

Portugal’s Supertubos and its wildly tricky tide affected waves has long been the graveyard of Kelly Slater’s dreams, a loss to wildcard Fred Morais in 2013 scuttled that year’s title run; same thing the following year when Slater destroyed a board after losing to Aritz Aranburu.

A couple of nights back, his dream of swinging out of the spotlight with an Olympic gold at Teahupoo is close to being shuttered after losing to the Brazilian Joao Chianca.

In response to the loss, Slater said, in a roundabout sorta way, thanks for the laughs but I ain’t never coming back to this hellhole again.

Now, in a just-released podcast with Amy Morin of the Verywell Mind Podcast, fifty-one-year-old Slater has spoken of his mental health, the therapy he does with his Chinese girlfriend Kalani, issues he had with his parents, retirement and so on, but also the heavy pushback he gets for his robust social presence.

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“Social media can be toxic. I’ve had people wish me death on social media many times for a comment or an opinion, literally I’ll come find you. Almost like scary stuff. And I think those people probably don’t even remember they did that, it’s weird because there’s this separation. You’re not in front of the person. Fifty years ago, 30 years ago, 20 years ago, they could just punch you in the face. Now there’s a paper trail and it turns into this whole thing. It’s like a legal battle, but at the same time people can say whatever they want with no accountability behind that. And so the face-to-face interactions with people are really what should build you up and make you who you are. And I think the social media thing, it’s sad because you see a lot of kids struggling with it. There’s a lot of bullying that goes on. I think there’s a lot of stuff that you don’t see unless you’re really right in these little pockets of people. I hear these stories of kids being bullied in school by other people and then committing suicide and it’s just terrible just because people want to be mean, it’s life’s a struggle for everybody in some capacity. And social media can make it harder.”

The Champ also talks about winning Pipe last year, and which opens season two of Apple TV +’s docuseries Make or Break.

“There’s this one moment in the contest where I should have lost and just in the last moment I end up winning. And that was about, it was just in the third or fourth round of the contest. And that was really the thing that springboarded me into just getting in the flow for this event and ultimately winning it. But I was going through a lot of stuff in my own mind that gets in the way. When you don’t win for a long time. I spent a lot of years winning on average, every fourth event that I surfed for 30 years basically. And then I didn’t win a contest for five years, a couple years I had off for injury and stuff. But still it starts to creep in your mind, I don’t know if I can do this. And just like the opposite when you’re young and you start to win, when you start to get on tour and you start winning some events, you see some of the young guys now, Jack Robinson, Gabe Medina, John John, Felipe Toledo, Griffin Colopinto, all these kids coming up. Once they start winning a few heats and beating the guys that they thought maybe they couldn’t beat at some point when they were younger, the confidence just gets there. You don’t question it. And so there’s a lifeline for all things. And so I was getting to this point where I didn’t know whether I could win again. And I knew I could on paper, I knew I could, but inside you go through your own struggles throughout an event and you have doubts. And even when it was seconds from happening, I was like, I can’t believe this is real. And so the feeling was really, for me, it was really pure and magical like when I was a kid again. And as far as the other episodes throughout the year, I haven’t watched them all, so I couldn’t tell you. But Filipe Toledo had an amazing year last year. He was definitely the standout surfer of the year and he won his first world title and I’m sure they’re going in depth to cover that. And each individual event, somebody’s going through something good and bad. And it’s just interesting to see all those stories that even if you’re not a fan of this sport, even if you don’t surf, there’s a lot of people who’ve been sucked into Formula One through what Box To Box has done and now they’re getting into the golf as well. And I think it’s the individual stories that are compelling for people to learn about. And I think through each of those, if they’re told right, you learn about yourself.”

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RQ.

he’s getting like the creepy older guy that is always the last person to leave the party.

Stick man

Guy seems miserable.

Sean Connery

It’s the face of man who keeps pushing it while full well knowing he should have quit at pipe last year. It’s kind of like when you keep taking the piss out of the wife and its funny at first but then you take it too far and then there is no turning back.

Durban Poison

Poor old GOAT getting trolled on social media for trolling science and LGTB people. It would be funny if his happily expressed ignorance wasn’t so fucking backward and dangerous for humanity.

Baz

Would be good if Kelly retired and then came back to run the show.

Piskian

I want to see Margs rip Margs once more.

Twinnie

All this talk of virtual – biffo has me thinking. When was the last real pro surfer scrap? Acai slaps and north point board tickles not included.
Mick Campbell and Andy?
Koby and was it JBG?

NEGATRON

It did. I started a Northerner v Southerner situation with a graffiti campaign written on the back of toilet doors every time I took a shit when I worked at the Royal Opera House in London in the late 90’s.

uop

I took a dump there… shit got outta hand…

Tom

Hippy said it below – the only way to make this remotely watchable is back to “dream tour” mindset
Smaller field 16 guys- maybe 2 wildcards derived from challenger style at each event rotating in/out

Pipe (winter)
Chopes
Fiji
Indo – 2-3 locations 2-3 events
Maldives
Phillipines
Chicama or similar
Somewhere mexico
Search – say skeleton bay or somewhere similar – hit up martin daly
Thats 10 events

Pay per view
3 judges – all ex surfers – commentary from Aint that swell
Find some diff sponsors
Present it like Supercar racing here in oz – the package is unreal the info clear!!
Those locations will sell the tour in tourists – people already going there anyway – not breaking secret territory say bar the “search style” – but its a no brainer

Its prime for a rebel tour – this year been totally fucked i cant even remember anything of first 2 events and haven’t got dementia

Hippy

You’re talking about Billafuck house, correct.

Well, and it was coke.

Jimmy the Saint

The WSL will give him wildcards for the remainder of the season. Tahiti and the surf ranch wouldn’t be the same without him

Hippy

Nah, those dudes are cheap.

AF

@surfads

Was going to comment last night, the WSL’s inability to run competitions in quality surf has gone a long way towards harpooning its own golden narrative around Kelly qualifying for the Olympics.

If as we are led to believe Kelly has skin in the operation of the WSL itself, you would have to think he would be pretty filthy with them for having to continue competing in such drivel. As would any fairytale-loving sports enthusiast.

Hippy

The tour is not set up to “score” good waves. Snakebit.

Drivel. Portugal in spring is for the locals who will ride out a bad season. Always be those days, like last week.

Smaller draw, no elimination, post up at A+ breaks and film the revolution.

Chief Hot stuff

And fairy tail lovers

tim_nelsen

carry on (you wayward sons) bastards!

tim_nelsen
Hippy

where is that?

Piskian

Kurobe,Toyama,Japan.
Lived down the road,school club was skijumping and only place allowed to brew their own booze.
A classic combo.

tim_nelsen

tahoe?

tim_nelsen

ONTHEPASSINGOFTHETORCH!

Coyote Belly

Do you ever let it rest? Take some deep breaths, homie.

Hippy

Answer Kelly.

Don’t go on social media.

Then we will remember you as Ke11y.

Sean Connery

If I was Kelly and those two things lined up this would have been me-
https://www.youtube.com/wat…

ValiantScorn

Constellis Group offers many International security plans. Contact us today, and start enjoying your business ventures with peace of mind!

NEGATRON

Once upon a time Nick Dee pretended to be a Woman and stalked me on the socials.

ValiantScorn

You reminiscing?

NEGATRON

Once upon a time ValiantScorn threatened to throw his “considerable resources” my direction after he was butt hurt from getting one too many badges.

Pauly Matt War-Shore

Really? HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

NEGATRON

Yip, still waiting for the Green Berets to kick down the front door.

Pauly Matt War-Shore

This is great stuff.

NEGATRON

Almost as good as Jeff Booth having a cry about your old Avatar name.

ValiantScorn

I didnt appreciate you using racist signals at me. My source said it appeared you’re not racist, just an ignorant white boy invader.

NEGATRON

I wondered why Jason Bourne visited Town. Explains it all 👍🏻

ValiantScorn

You have a nice little Family. Stay grounded.

NEGATRON

Nice? Your source is obviously ripping you off.

tim_nelsen

did we knock him out or is there a comeback? he and otto and ted & dorian shoot arrows. let’s play some darts!

Brutus

or fantasizing, now there’s a ….???

Com Turren

An exception will be made for Kelly to be on team USA in 2024 because he is already impliedly threatening to surf for Syria if he doesn’t get his way (why do you think anyone is even suggesting this?), and anyone who knows anything about Kelly knows that would not be an idle threat.

USA Surfing is not going to allow that to happen, because if Kelly ultimately wins a medal under the banner of a country run by a brutal dictator like Assad, USA Surfing is going to look like a bunch of feckless cucks while Kelly couldn’t care less about what that move would do to his reputation.

Abscessed Llama

your theory will soon be tested..

ValiantScorn

A “dictator” can’t exist without a bunch of gullible buffoons behind him! Just look at Biden, and all the mental midgets that are in his cult!

Hippy

No cult, a reaction to the cult of Chump.

Sorry man.

Hippy

Bidens only job was to beat the orange CLOWN.

Well done Joe!

Chief Hot stuff
Hippy

He did his job.

That angers you.

Chief Hot stuff

You wish!!

ValiantScorn

Great. Maybe you can trade seashell necklaces for food.

Hippy

I had no idea you tied seashell necklaces.

How much will you sell an 18″ one…. well, 40?

ValiantScorn

Im lazy….3-D print them

Com Turren

In the case of Assad, he couldn’t exist without Putin behind him. Which means that Assad is gay, and so is Putin, which means that Biden the Libs are “owning” you. It’s science.

Hippy

Dots connect!

ValiantScorn

Weird….

Hippy

Impliedly?

Hippy

For sure, so ghetto of Kelly to rep Syria.

Man, can you imagine the Joe Rogan show?


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