"Lately we've been dressing for revenge..."
The World Surf League has made a near infinite amount of blunders since billionaire Dirk Ziff took ownership some eight years ago. From Paul Speaker declaring professional surfing would soon be bigger than the National Football League to Erik Logan becoming unceremoniously fired in Brazil, there have been, really, an unbroken string of LOLs. Rare in this day and age when a chuckle is quickly followed by cancellation.
One of the consistent funniest of funnies, though, has been the attempt to normalize “surf jerseys.” Who could ever forget Japan’s silver medalist Kanoa Igarashi being branded Igarshi for the Surf Ranch Pro or Tyler Wright in general?
The whole business reached peak ridiculous during the just-wrapped Finals Day wherein the World Surf League decided to adorn the garments with “stunningly bad” limited edition slogans.
The Pride of Culburra.
I’d imagine children in Sri Lanka are being forced to wear after unsold stores are shipped off shore, though oh what might have been.
ESPN is reporting that the Kansas City Chief’s tight end Travis Kelce had his jersey sales spike by 400% after rumors began swirling that Taylor Swift, currently the most famous person on the planet, was his love interest.
Per the “worldwide leader in sports:”
Taylor Swift’s trip to watch Kansas City Chiefs star Travis Kelce play football Sunday didn’t just have the internet talking nonstop.
After the 12-time Grammy Award winner’s appearance at Arrowhead Stadium, jersey sales for the All-Pro tight end seemingly skyrocketed.
According to sportswear and fan merchandise company Fanatics, Kelce’s jersey was one of the top five for the NFL on Sunday. He “saw a nearly 400% spike in sales throughout the Fanatics network of sites, including NFLShop.com,” a spokesperson told The Associated Press via email.
But you are certainly old enough to remember when rumors swirled that Swift was smitten with our very own John John Florence some decade ago? A golden and singular moment where all of Dirk Ziff’s hopes and dreams might have come true.
Alas, it all proved false but how depressed is the World Surf League today?
400% jersey spike?
They retail for around $50 meaning John John’s would have brought in a whopping $20,000 total.
Though, is the aforementioned Erik Logan to blame?
You are also certainly old enough to remember when the Oklahoman with a magical wetsuit of armor castigated Swift in a red hot tweet, pegging the beloved singer-songwriter with, “For someone who draws such power from being the ‘voice’ and against all the things you talk about, I’m watching you violate what you allegedly stand for. You’re the real bully.”
Some things age well.
Like Erik Logan.
Or the World Surf League.