"This ignominy cannot go unpunished."
Southern California, stretching from El Cajon up to Santa Barbara, is a country in and of itself. With a population greater than Australia and more economic might than the United Kingdom, the bottom quarter of this Golden State is certainly something. Now, I am not from here, originally, having sprouted in Oregon but folk here, especially the ones who have not blown in, take great pride in their various cities and towns even though, to the untrained eye, Southern California is one contiguous sprawl. Those who call Leucadia home, like Chris Cote for example, where that “L” haughtily on their foreheads (in ball cap form). Those who dwell in the aforementioned Santa Babs sneer at outsiders while slurping fresh sea urchin, like our very own Jen See.
Oxnard, west of Thousand Oaks, south of Ventura, doesn’t get much press though its locals are no less fiercely satisfied with their stretch of coast, including Silver Strand, famous for its wedges and menacing local reputation. Though, this morning, its 200,000 souls are waking up seething rage, plotting some form of revenge as the town was named “least fun city in America” by personal finance company WalletHub.
The list was compiled by ranking cities across this great nation on their “entertainment and recreation, nightlife and parties, cost of living” and sixty-five other metrics including “average business hours of breweries.”
Las Vegas, as you might imagine, ranked number one.
Oxnard, without explanation, dead last.
Timmy Curran pissed.
But have you ever been to Oxnard, yourself? I have a handful of times, none memorable except for the time that I visited Timmy Curran, surfer famous for inventing the alley-oop. Seeing what I saw in his eyes, I’d be terrified if I was a WalletHub exec. Absolutely terrified.
More as the story develops.
While it is developing, though, enjoy early Curran alley-ooping.
