Man wrestles shark into car on Sunshine Coast.
Man wrestles shark into his ute on Australia's Sunshine Coast. | Photo: @nicka35

Australia’s Sunshine Coast rocked by scenes of man wrestling shark into his car

“How is this elite level motherf*cker with catch of the day?"

Amid its worst crime wave in history, a sea of car jackings and teens ransacking the bleak apartments of the demented and aged in retirement homes, a man has brought joy into the lives of Sunshine Coasters after being filmed wrestling a shark into the back of his pick-up. 

The Sunshine Coast is that forty mile stretch an hour’s north of Brisbane that includes the famed Noosa points and, at one point, was the home of clothing magnate Julian Wilson. 

Four years ago, the WSL tried to get a piece of the Sunshine Coast with Kelly Slater urging the Queensland government to approve the WSL’s billion-dollar development on 510-hectares, or 1200 acres, of “highly constrained land” near the beach town of Coolum.

“This wave would become somewhat of a mecca and put the Sunshine Coast back on the (surfing) map…it will bring a lot of interest to the area and it will be a place that I know a lot of people are going to want to surf and have an ongoing impact on the local area…we have had so many people asking for so long where we’re going to build the next wave including Australia,” Slater told the local press.

Anyway in Maroochydore, which is up the northern end of the Sunshine Coast, we find our hero, muscling a small, though not insignificant shark into the pickup while happy children, captivated, look on. 

“How is this elite level motherfucker with catch of the day,” says surf reporter Nicka35, whom we last saw reporting on the car-jacking of a surfer on the Gold Coast. “A massive shark and under the strain he carries it to his ute to try and toss it in and…nah…Big fail on the first attempt. the thing must weight twenty kilos. He’s got flake for days. This guy is one of Maroochydore’s absolutely fucking elite.” 

 

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Olde School localism flashes snarling lip as Oxnard heavies inform outsiders “If you don’t live here, don’t surf here”

Uh oh.

Surf localism has been in steady decline over this past decade. Perpetual surveillance, ubiquitous smart phones, lawsuit-happy nerds, hate crimes being codified etc. have all conspired to keep the once fearsome beach enforcer proverbially handcuffed. Certain behavioralists have even suggested that paddling toughs will be fully extinct by 2029.

But not if Oxnard has something to say about it.

The burgh of just over 200,000, a handful of clicks north of Malibu, has long enjoyed a reputation for water violence. There was a time, not long ago, when Silver Strand was surfed exclusively by heavies. Teeth of interlopers punched out on the silver sand. Windshields well waxed.

“Laws” n crud have emboldened a new crop of adult learners, though, and there they drag their Wavestorms and changing mats from Irwindale and Victorville to places they shouldn’t.

Until now.

For now, after they surf, before they step on their changing mats, these aliens are being punched right in the mouth with a bold new sticker reminding “If you don’t live here, don’t surf here.”

Back to Sprinter vans they shuffle, quickly checking Zillow for Oxnard home values.

Regret for not pouncing on property back in 2018 overwhelming.

On that subject, what is your biggest regret of the last six years?

Get it off your chest amongst friends.


Erik Logan (pictured) gone but not forgotten.
Erik Logan (pictured) gone but not forgotten.

Former World Surf League CEO Erik Logan posts cryptic video of himself trapped in closet after announcement of replacement

"Seemed easy enough."

While the announcement of video game executive Ryan Crosby taking the reins of the World Surf League as new chief has barely begun to process, surf fans immediately became concerned for Erik Logan, wondering how the former big boss is faring. Logan’s Instagram account, a source of joy and accidental sexual harassment when he was in charge, was the first stop. Though he had darkened it for months directly after his brutal dismissal, the lights were turned back on not long ago as the Oklahoman pivoted to the inspirational speaking circuit.

Helping others turn their passion into their profession.

Logan’s response to the Crosby news, anyhow, a cryptic video of himself trapped in a closet, seemingly not pleased though also pleased enough to throw crying laughing emojis.

What could it possibly mean?

Logan, of course, went entirely unmentioned in the World Surf League’s official rolling out of its latest charge, owner-in-chief Dirk Ziff merely dropping, “We are thrilled to welcome Ryan Crosby as the new CEO of the World Surf League. Ryan’s exceptional track record across some of the most important media platforms, his authentic, approachable manner, and his genuine passion for surfing make him a great fit to lead the WSL into its next chapter of growth and innovation.”

But we won’t forget Erik Logan, will we.

On that note, do you imagine Ryan Crosby will ring our ELo up and pick his brain? Get a little inside info? Borrow sitting champion Filipe Toledo’s chest?

He’d be remiss not to.


Crosby (pictured) ready for anything.
Crosby (pictured) ready for anything.

“Weird and unnecessary” wait over as World Surf League taps video game exec as new CEO!

"What I love about surfing is that it’s an incredible competitive sport, but it’s also much more than that."

It seems like an eternity since Erik Logan became “no longer with the company.” Last year, at this time, the Oklahoman with a magical wetsuit of armor was as much a part of professional surfing as, say, Joe Turpel’s velvety pipes. He was here, there, everywhere. Sucking the wind straight out of Jack Robinson. Wearing Filipe Toledo’s torso skin.

The all singing, all dancing crap of the World Surf League.

And then, like that, he was gone. His employer giving no reason, just an icy silence that dragged on and on and on in weird and unnecessary ways.

Until today.

For today, professional surfing has its captain. But let us extend a warm BeachGrit welcome to Ryan Crosby who comes to us via Riot Games. According to Sportico, which broke the exciting news:

Crosby joined Riot, the developer of League of Legends and Valorant, in 2021, after previous stops at Activision, Netflix and Hulu. Atop the WSL, Crosby will be responsible for continuing to grow its digital footprint, marketing surfing stars and taking advantage of the spotlight the sport will receive this summer as Olympians compete in Tahiti.

Crosby, for his part, declared, “What I love about surfing is that it’s an incredible competitive sport, but it’s also much more than that. It’s a way of life, a passion and a deeply committed global community. I am excited to leverage my experience to elevate the WSL brand, deepen our connection with fans and continue building something that surfers can be proud of.”

The World Surf League, for its part, emphasized that Crosby “has a personal passion for surf” and is involved with Surfrider.

Should the “personal passion” lesson have been learned after Erik Logan brought it with him to Brazil never to be seen again?

More as the story develops.


Gold Coast car thief

Surf town in fury after car thief who nearly killed baby in pram escapes Gold Coast mob!

"There’s heaps of petty crime here but it’s psychotic what he did."

Last Sunday, a furore erupted after a car thief, fleeing an enraged mob, nearly drove a surfer’s car into a daddy pushing a pram at D- bah, just over the hill from Snapper there.

Read, Wild Scenes on Gold Coast as Surfer’s 4WD stolen in front of him before nearly hitting a pram.

Car thefts, and stabbings and homicides, hits, ain’t anything new on the Gold Coast, the joint is crawling with junkies and gangsters and whomever else is locked into the system, as they say.

But what made this car theft different was how many people he nearly flattened on his way out of the carpark, and how widely disseminated the footage was.

 

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As it turned out, the surfer whose 2104 Toyota Prado, forty k or so if you wanted to buy, these things hold their value, is an old pal of DR’s, a surf industry vet called Liam Geale.

Geale is forty-three, six-two, a lean TRT-buffed two-twenty pounds, a jiujitsu purple belt and fight fan. Not the sorta cat you want confronting you while you’re sitting in the front seat trying to take the family whip away.

Geale was enjoying a post-surf debrief with his pal and shaper Alex Crews when he heard the familiar gurgle and roar of his customised exhaust system.

“I went, ‘That’s my fucking car,’” says Geale. “I turned around and saw it pulling out slowly. I was trying to register what was happening.”

Geale says he walked over, “hurriedly paced” is how he describes it, opens the door and tells the unofficial driver,

“Get of my fucking car, mate.”

The car thief is little compared to monster Geale and has already moved the seat close to the steering wheel and, safety conscious, is strapped in with his seat belt.

He roars off, door swinging open, and heads to the cul-de-sac at the northern end of the beach where you turn around and head back towards either up the hill to Rainbow Bay or around the headland to Tweed Heads and Coolangatta.

A carpenter moves his car into the middle of the road, blocking access.

Someone calls the cops.

The car thief drives around the edge of the embankment, Geale thinks he’;s going to flip the Prado and roll onto the beach.

car-thief

Thief is lucky. Someone moves their car as he’s flying past, opening the road. The man with the pram with a two-year-old inside flies down the rock embankment to escape being crushed.

(Geale will later get a message from a pal telling him his car flew around a blind corner on the way out doing eighty clicks, nearly taking him out.)

Cops come.

Geale’s phone is still in the car so they use Find iPhone to track it down at a nearby mall. The thief is later filmed on CCTV running through the Tweed Heads hospital and being collected by accomplices in another car.

car thief

The event solidified two things in Geale’s mind, one, never to use those surf lock box things. The u-bolt was in tact, the bandit has simply prised it open. Two, it reinforced how tight the surf community is on the Gold Coast and Tweed.

Geale says it’s an interesting town ‘cause you’re valued on your etiquette and ability in the water, not on how much you earn or how much you spent on your Palm Springs lookalike joint with the palm trees and cactus arranged just so in the paved front yard.

Liam Geale and Izaak Michell.
Liam Geale and fight lord Izaak Michell, post wrestle.

Geale runs The Board Lab, about as core a surf shop as you’ll get in this VAL-dominated epoch, attached to the front of the Sharp Eye factory in South Tweed Heads. No clothes, boards, fins, wax and leashes. Like surf shops of yore it even sponsors surfers.

“It smells like surfboards and there’s actual surfers. Jack Robinson will come through picking up boards, Rio Wada will be here.”

About the theft, Geale says he’s been getting DMs from all over the world saying things like, “I hope you get him, I hope he gets what he deserves.”

The cops are taking it real seriously, given the kid in the pram bit.

“There’s heaps of petty crime here but it’s fucking psychotic what he did,” says Geale. It was almost like a car jacking.”