World Surf League brazenly curses forecast ahead of Tahiti Pro

"The perfection of Tahiti awaits the world’s best surfers during the competition window."

Surfers are nothing if not superstitious and especially when it comes to our little political wet energy mounds. No surfer worth her salt will hype a potential swell event nor even think “I’m taking the next one in” near the end of a session lest the universe is bending its ear and hearing the haughtiness. That universe is mean and will instantly dry up the aforementioned little political wet energy mounds leaving the brash bastardette unfulfilled.

Enter the World Surf League.

The Shiseido Tahiti Pro is but days away with surf fans eagerly anticipating the first event post cut. We have not seen professional surfing at its highest level since Margaret River closed its doors on April 21. Final’s day, there, was a banger, if I recall, with fine waves and fine performances. A rarity this season which has been downright cursed by lousy conditions. The WSL, it appears, hopes to keep the ugly streak going.

In an entirely ill-advised press release, the “global home of surfing,” brazenly declared, “The perfection of Tahiti awaits the world’s best surfers during the competition window of May 22 through 31, 2024. They will no doubt be looking to prove themselves next week at Teahupo’o, as that break will also be the surfing venue for the Olympic Games Paris 2024 from July 27 through August 5, 2024.

The perfection of Tahiti awaits?

Perfection?

Oh, I can just see that universe now, guffawing at El Segundo’s contemptuous call, dialing up howling cross-winds and a ten day little political wet energy mound event not exceeding three-feet.

Thanks, WSL.

Thanks a lot.