Kelly Slater (right) preparing to pop right off.
Kelly Slater (right) preparing to pop right off.

Kelly Slater, Jordy Smith and other pro surfers prepare to unload after comedian Rob Schneider declares cancel culture over

Hammers will drop.

The Cancel Era (2016 – 2024) hit some communities harder than others but professional surfers hardest of all. Long used to speaking minds, holding forth on subjects without fear of execution in the public square etc., professional surfers watched in horror as others were silence and stripped of livelihoods. The response, naturally, was to pipe down and keep important thoughts to selves.

Well, in a stunning turn, the muzzles have been ripped right off. The death blow, apparently, a Rob Schneider comedy set at a Regina, Saskatchewan, hospital fundraiser wherein he delivered jokes perceived as anti-trans and anti-vaccine to a grouchy audience.

Guest in the audience Tynan Allan told the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation,

“Everyone in the room was groaning, saying, ‘What is going on?’ Like, whispering to themselves. Not a single laugh at times. It was just very apparent how uncomfortable everyone felt and how unacceptable the things he was talking about were.”

The hospital issued a statement declaring,

“While we recognize that in a free and democratic society, individuals are entitled to their views and opinions and that comedy is intended to be edgy, the content, positions and opinions expressed during Mr. Schneider’s set do not align with the values of our foundation and team. We do not condone, accept, endorse or share Mr. Schneider’s positions, as expressed during his comedy set, and acknowledge that in this instance the performance did not meet the expectations of our audience and our team.”

Now, just months ago, weeks even, Schneider would have been relieved from his celebrity status and placed upon the dustbin but the New York Post caught up with the funnyman on the streets of Manhattan, asking about the event, and Schneider declared simply, “Cancel culture is over,” then proceeded to share that he will likely be co-starring in more Adam Sandler films.

Surf fans immediately wondered which professional surfer would break the seal first and what previously controversial stand they would take. Jack Robinson openly embracing Hungary’s Viktor Orbán? Sawyer Lindblad opining on the war in Gaza? Kelly Slater questioning the efficacy, even point, of vaccines?

Which professional surfer do you want it to be and what do you want them to say?

Share!

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Open Thread: Comment Live on for reals Finals Day of El Salvador Pro

Hopefully for reals, that is.

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US Olympian Kolohe Andino Hates Surfing!

“Chas hates surfing less than me… I know I'm crazy but I might be delusional."

A fine piece off marketing theatre two months back when the former world title contender Kolohe Andino stunned surf fans with a profanity laden screed on Instagram.

“Surfing culture, big time surf brands and the ‘surf lifestyle’ are FUCKING dead,” wrote the thirty-year-old Daddy of two. “You got every FUCKING up and coming kid thinking they are one of the Paul brothers. Trying to gain cloud in any way, shape or form, with no gumption, no backbone, or no idea. These kids are not leaders, they are followers.”

It was a pointer to his and his San Clemente pals’ clothing venture 2 Percent, which offers hats, hoodies, jackets etc in a nineties homegrown style.

Apart from not reaching the stellar heights that were predicted for him as a teenager, Kolohe Andino will be remembered for helping get the Surf Ranch Pro onto the tour.

“After watching footage, Kolohe Andino goes, ‘Why isn’t this on tour…well think about it!’” remembered Slater in his excellent documentary series Lost Tapes. “That’s when the conversation became real.”

Ironically, Kolohe’s initial enthusiasm turned to sad when the contest did manifest, Kolohe accusing the judges of “playing mind tricks” and rewarding safety surfing and sitting in a barrel that carried with no risk.

BeachGrit has always held Kolohe Andino close to our hearts. I knew his daddy Dino during his wild nineties epoch and first met the boy prodigy, then sixteen, on a holiday to the Canary Islands where he exhibited what were then exotic flavours of aerials.

A perfect fit for Chas Smith Hates Surfing to discuss life off tour, the rise of the San Clemente squad, Griff, Cole, Crosby, Kade, at the expense of the Brazilian Storm and the death of the old school surf industry.

“Chas hates surfing less than me,” Kolohe wrote to me during preliminary discussions.

And, later, “I know I’m crazy but I might be delusional.”

Essential.

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Surfer's Point.
Surfer's Point.

Surfer swept out to sea near Margaret River in Western Australia

"That swell close to four metres is big waves, towers of waves coming through and crashing onto shore."

Hours ago, the search was called off for a surfer in his mid-40s who was swept out to sea very near Margaret River in Western Australia. The man had paddled Surfers Point in Prevelly though appeared to be distressed. Another surfer in the water attempted to help but was prevented by rough currents.

The emergency services were called in and began searching both the water and the beach, finding nothing. The area has since been closed to the public.

Joey Rawson from the Bureau of Meteorology said yesterday’s conditions were “keenly sought by surfers,” according to the Australia Broadcasting Corp.

“The swell was about 3.8 metres, light offshore winds,” the senior meteorologist said. “That swell close to four metres is big waves, towers of waves coming through and crashing onto shore.”

Surf fans are, of course, aware that the break is one considered during the World Surf League’s annual stop won by local hero Jack Robinson, for the men, and Hawaii’s Gabriela Bryan, for the women.

Those in the area with any knowledge are asked to contact the authorities.

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Cultural appropriation + colonialism = no no.
Cultural appropriation + colonialism = no no.

Reason for shock firing of World Surf League CEO Erik Logan possibly revealed on official channel nearly a year on

Big if true.

A year ago, from this very time, all was right in Erik Logan’s universe. The former Oprah Winfrey executive had graduated to his dream job atop the vast and important complex of competitive professional surfing. There he sat in the chief executive’s chair, giant photograph of Laird Hamilton hanging over head, all power and praise belonging to him. The Oklahoman with a magical wetsuit of armor was far from camera shy, enjoying being the face of the World Surf League, jokin’ and joshin’ and havin’ a good ol’ time (unless Conner Coffin happened to call and then he would, allegedly, spin into a rage, telling the universally adored Santa Barbaran “I will ruin you.”).

Then, like that, he was gone. The tour had landed in Brazil, Logan followed along, sharing behind-the-scenes footage on his robust Instagram account one day, fired in the most terse press release the next.

“Effective immediately, Erik Logan is no longer with the company.”

The World Surf League placed a cone of silence around its patented Wall of Positive Noise and no official reason was shared. Privately, some on tour whispered that Logan had made people “uncomfortable,” but nothing more.

Now, almost a year on, a potential reason has been revealed hiding in plain sight on the World Surf League’s own portal. Days ago, an eagle-eye’d citizen surf journalist Googled “Erik Logan” and underneath the official “Letter to the WSL Community from CEO Erik Logan” it read, “Erik Logan sounds like a colonist and is an embarrassment to the WSL and to our sport. WSL needs to take responsibility for its announcers…”

Boom.

And is that it? Was Logan forced out due to his “colonizer vibes?” It would make sense, seeing how he colonized Filipe Toledo’s naked chest.

What do you think Mitchell Salazar feels about that?

More as the story develops.

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