Separated at birth?
For lovers of surfing, of which at least a few of you still are although that may be withering, you’ll be well aware of the women’s tour vet Sally Fitzgibbons.
The thirty-two-year-old Australian is a former world number one whose electric smile, dark and enormous eyes, rippled stomach and with skin agleam like a seal fresh out of the sea, has long made her a favourite with sports fans of all pronouns.
Two years ago, Fitzgibbons, who was one of the first women to consistently land aerials, was sensationally dumped from the tour after fourteen years and one hundred and eight consecutive events only to be shovelled a wildcard for the following year’s events following an enormous outcry.
Fitzgibbons is currently rated thirteenth on the Championship Tour, not very good, but is third on the Challenger Series, which means she’ll get another shot at a world title in 2025.
Anyway, online sleuths have revealed Fitzgibbons to be the doppelgänger of the “Hawk Tuah” girl, also known as Hailey Welch, who became an overnight sensation thanks to her charming response in a viral video interview.
The video, which was posted by creator duo Tim and Dee TV, shows Welch and a friend being asked questions during a night out in Nashville, Tennessee.
When asked about a move in bed that makes a man go crazy every time, Welch, who has a sloe-eyed loveliness punctuated by these amorous soft-brown eyes, replied, “You gotta give ’em that ‘hawk TUAH’ and spit on that thang!”, the ‘hawk TUAH’ mimicking the sound of spitting on what might be presumed as a gorgeous column standing stiffly in the rainstorm.
Welch, who is a 21-year-old from Belfast, Tennessee, was on vacation in Nashville when the video was shot. She dropped out of college a year or two ago and has been working at a spring factory.
Lately, Welch has appeared on stage with country singer Zach Bryan and hung out with basketball legend Shaquille O’Neal.
Sally Fitzgibbons, meanwhile, is preparing for the US Open of Surfing which begins August 6 and which has been poetically described, here, as a “yearly bacchanal wherein professional surfers bounce up and down upon their boards.”
Commented on Disqus? Log out, tap the Disqus button, and your old name and comments come back. The box is ours.
Your comments are still here. Every one of them.
Twelve years of BeachGrit comments came across from Disqus. Connect and we will show you how many are yours. We get your username, nothing else.
Connect Disqus to reveal.
I’d Marry Sarry. 🥺. Yet I Dead already. 🥺🥷🏻
My pleasure
Yes
Now that you mention it, Hailey does look a lot like hailey. It’s always good when Derek finds an excuse to write erotica
Its pronounced Ha’aauak Tuohoua’ you fuckin insensitive millennials.
A lost generation. These little girls are talking evil shit. If you have enough spit in your mouth, there is NO need for you to take your mouth off of the tool! Spitting means you are about to attempt something that I don’t allow. I let you drop my drawers, to complete the job in your lie hole. Not bore me, and assault my cock.
So cringe.
big incel energy
Are you trying to say you have a better method!? Biological females only, colonizer.
Redefining TMI. Anyone know how to unread a comment? #incelpower
“History doesn’t repeat itself, but it often rhymes.”
https://youtu.be/zBBsb0z9RJ…
it appears you’ve already scraped as much as possible from the bottom of the barrel and decided to turn the barrel over and scrape the muck from under the barrel.
you worked very hard to tie dick spit to our gal sal. brilliant.
https://m.youtube.com/watch…
Love it when Sal talks (shouts) shed!
Bravo Derek. Some of your finest. lol
Handed to me on platter by one-day surf shaper billionaire!
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Fuck you win BG
cunt!
Jacob Wilcox and Cleetus McFarland are brothers don’t believe me, just look.
A bit of tua is ok , but spare me the hawk
fo’ real.
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
Let’s go to Joe and Hawk Tuah On the Glass
Like to see Joe and company work “Hawk Tuah!” into the vernacular to describe Chopes spit..
Reckon ol’ love Hailey’s had more pricks than a second hand dart board?
Seems like a legend. Doubt she’d fuck you.
lol, fuck you’re shit cunt
You should definitely cry about it
cry is free
cry wank
Tears as lube
Wank is free.
Pauly’s pissed because Hailey’s close to breaking his record.
oof