"Surfing in the Seine is great, it's mega, but doing it with the Eiffel Tower behind you is even more special."

My time is Paris is coming to a close and I have thoroughly enjoyed this month. The City of Light has been electric, throughout, the local population having retreated before the 2024 Olympics began fearing gridlock and general nastiness. Instead, it has been an earthly paradise. Restaurants easy to get into, foie gras flowing like white wine. As the surfing component of the Games got underway some ten-ish days ago, I felt sad that our heroes and heroines were forced to be some 10,000 miles away eating poisson cru in the middle of the Pacific.

Well, things have been rectified at least for bronze medalist Gabriel Medina, who came and dined in proper bistros while getting lightly trolled and gold medalist Kauli Vaast, who made Filipe Toledo’s dreams come true by surfing a man-generated, under knee high wave on the famous river Seine.

The two-time Brazilian champ made news, earlier, when he opined that future Olympic surfing events should be contested in pools, saying, “Every four years, I think the athlete needs to be prepared for this unique moment that is the Olympics and be sure that they will deliver their best!”

The handsome Frenchman, anyhow, had to work for every once of forward momentum but seems to enjoy his time, declaring, “Surfing in the Seine is great, it’s mega, but doing it with the Eiffel Tower behind you is even more special.”

As you know, Paris made a great effort to clean the Seine ahead of the Games and used the famous waters as venue for long distance swimming though three Germans fell ill after their event, one penning, “Vomited 9 times yesterday + diarrhea. Water quality in the Seine is approved.”

Classic German aggression and yet to be seen if the French quickly abandon the river allowing for occupation.

Back to Vaast, though, does his Olympic gold eclipse both Filipe Toledo championships?

Disqus.

“The theft that the priority judge did to us in the Olympics was evident."

Peru citizens are preparing for a barrage of death threats and poop emojis after the country’s surfing association declared it was filing a formal claim on behalf of Olympic 4th place finisher Alonso Correa who thrilled the world with his Teahupoo gallantry. The issue at hand is an apparent priority issue during Correa’s heat with Brazilian hunk Gabriel Medina.

“The theft that the priority judge did to us in the Olympics was evident,” President of the Federacaion Peru Team, Jaime Gensollen told Peru’s Radio Ovacion. “After both of them ride a wave and return to the point where the wave forms again, the two paddle together but the one who arrives first has the first priority to catch the wave that comes next, exactly that wave was taken by (Gabriel) Medina, However, the one who arrived first was Alonso Correa, so he had priority.”

“In this case Gabriel Medina executes (the wave) and is where he scores more than seven points,” he continued, “when said wave belonged to Alonso Correa. The trip technicians just arrived yesterday, we are going to evaluate with the legal part, since we seek to present the claim as soon as possible, we want them to rectify what was given.”

Brazilian surf fans, known for their passionate love of country will certainly be invading Peruvian Instagram accounts extremely soon, possibly led by the patriarch of House Toledo (7/29 – 7/30) himself.

Ricardo Toledo, valiant social media warrior, father of Filipe the Lionheart, became infuriated at the insinuation that Brazil’s sharks liked cocaine. How much more rage-filled will he get with this provocation?

But do you imagine the Costeños will be able to rebuff? Possibly conjuring the great hero Simon Bolivar (pictured above) to beat back their Portuguese neighbors to the southeast?

Tense days.

Candles at the ready, please.