"Who cares about expensive watches now freedom is being taken away."
Kelly Slater is out there living his best life. The winningest surfer of all-time, still not officially retired, is currently in Rome, Italy on behalf of luxury watch maker Breitling which just so happens to be celebrating its 140th year in business which, coincidentally, fell on the same date as Slater and his longtime girlfriend Kalani Miller’s anniversary.
The 56-year-old took to Instagram, as he is wont to do, in order to toast both parties, writing:
Great to be in Rome this past week with @breitling celebrating 140 Years in 140 Stories and The Breitling Book of Surfing with @rizzolibooks. @georgeskern is an amazing host, and it’s been a real pleasure to work with Breitling designing watches and take part in their depiction of Air, Land, and Sea stories as part of the Surf Squad with @stephaniegilmore and @sally_fitz. I hope in 10 years to be celebrating 150 years with such a great brand! ⏱️ By chance, it also coincided with me and @kalanimiller’s anniversary so it was a welcome two day getaway in one of the most idyllic cities on earth for some great food and gelato. 🙂
A heartstring tugger if there ever was one except, apparently, it was also a portal into an apocalyptic abyss. The chaos kicked off with a Kelly Slater fan declaring, “Who cares about expensive watches now freedom is being taken away.” Slater, ever curious, wondered, “Which freedoms and by whom?” thus breaking hell loose.
A sampling:
“The G20 nations have the digital Currency and the digital id’s ready. 4 everyone. End of freedom.”
“You’re all hacked, you do anything for money. You’re not bright, so the rfks and quiky etc easily hack you. Davo was that out there it only half worked on him. Pagey is full tragic too. What were seeing now is the truth, we can see the geno cide, ecosystem destruction, dmb millennials. The kids are very very dmb. Humans have been wrecking soils. Can’t keep doing it, the soils are leached. The people are minerally deficient. The future is going to be sht. But it’s still pretty healthy here. P did it exposing how sick you all are, it’s is rael behind it with usa behind is rael with Europe creating usa. We’re at the end. Look how you’ve all been behaving. Which doesn’t make you happy. The people want a loving connection. But money prevents us coming together. I still miss davo but I go to bed early so I don’t miss him keeping me up like he was the energiser bunny. I’m sick of the suffering. I just feed the animals and avoid the people. They’re all sick and rowdy..”
“Chemtrails in Rome look superb this time of year.”
Thought it was Joe Rogan.
Etc.
Slater’s very good friend Shane Dorian tried to ebb the flow, posting that the 11x champion looked “slick” but gates of hades already well open.
Back to you, though. Chemtrails: yay or nay?
More as the story develops.
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That’s how he keeps passing me in age! Breitling! Time waits for no one….
Why is it that conspiracy theorists are mostly old white people living on their own?
It sure is with this comment.
This is that badge:
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
Chemtrails..aka Geoengineering is 100% REAL And a Crime against humanity!!! Wake the fuck up SURFERS!!!
Thanks for the link. Now I can be an old man screaming at the clouds.
These folks do a fair job of documentating their theories.
loved your monologue in lost across america..
Making the anniversary of his most important human relationship a footnote to a watch ad was a master stroke.
Peak Slater.
Chem cheminey, chem cheminey, chem chem cher-ee
A sweep is as lucky as lucky can be
Chem cheminey, chem cheminey, chem chem cher-oo
Good luck will rub off when I shakes ‘ands with you
Or blow me a kiss
And that’s lucky too
Right I’ve got 4 minutes with the boy before I get on a plane to that outer reef and parachute down to slay it and be on time to wash arse. You need a watch for that peoples. A device is too cumbersome
Ke11y is bald, Jeff Bezos is bald. Jeff flys around in a cock rocket, Ke11y’s girl gives birth to a nameless child = cumtrails conspiracy confirmed.
can someone explain to me and a newly acquired acquaintance WTF watches are needed for?
Seems to me they are just status symbol of a useless tool of bygone era?
Brietbartling
Today is the best day in the history of the world and tomorrow will be even better.
today is the last day of the good old days!
Until tomorrow
when yesterday becomes the good old days!
Glen
January 20, 2023
God knows what you fems are up to as much as you talk down about other places and things. My guess is you are trying to vent because you were both finger banged in your assholea while in Daytona AND Cocoa……
Read this in an article about Kelly’s hometown, and thought @Dogsnuts had another account!?
Haha wtf is even happening ☺️
Xox
100 percent sure this story will not develop
What Roman cuisine is Kelly enjoying? All the good shit contains one or all of cheese, cured pork or pasta. Not a hint of açaí or bone broth in Roman cuisine.
He’ll be lounging on a sedan chair while kalani peels him another grape.
That’s hard to do while breastfeeding.
As if kelly cares
Slater slatting all the turds down the lavvo. Stand up guy with top CV. Will have to be careful with the real power though.
You care Sean. Xx
Kelly eats gelato while zuck is going full-on, all-out 21st century digital roman emperor.
We’re all doomed.
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
I love a good chemtrail sunset.
dirty old river
must you keep rolling
with silver iodide
big jets so busy
make me feel dizzy
fake clouds fill up the sky
but i don’t
feel afraid
as long as i gaze on
chemtrail sunset
i am in paradise