BIPOC “Queen of Crazy” Mason Ho, “beautiful
and fat” Noa Deane and surfing’s greatest virtuoso Clay Marzo
deliver a masterpiece in contemporary surfing, “A penetrating
glimpse into sport’s most exciting talents!”
A vulgar excess of high-fidelity contemporary
surfing from surfing's three hottest and most enduring talents!
Most surfer edits are like very bad coffee. They taste like
boiled rags and they make you angry for stealing your time and your
hope.
In this edit from the studio of maestro Riordan Pringle,
Hawaii’s “Queen of Crazy” Mason Ho, thirty-four, the mercurial Clay
Marzo from Maui, thirty-three and Australia’s Noa Deane,
twenty-eight, put on a show that’s so damn exciting you’ll have to
scrape off your eyes with spoons!
Better than a multiple-nozzled shower and a vulgar excess of
golden sunshine!
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"Big Squats" saved Nathan Florence from the
chair after wiping out on this wild wave at Jaws. Nathan
Florence
Hawaiian big-wave superstar dubbed “the
world’s smartest surfer” credits his bodybuilding regime for saving
him from a wheelchair following catastrophic back-breaking wipeout!
“Deadlifts saved me!”
"I slammed on my back on the bottom of the barrel.
Right when I slammed, I felt a snap in my lower back, right on my
spine.”
Only one month ago, the sexy powerlifter turned Only
Fans star Nathan Florence was rushed to hospital by guy-pal Kai
Lenny after a wipeout during a twenty-foot day at Jaws,
also known as Peahi, a wild outer reef on the island of Maui.
“I got picked up and I fell through the barrel. I fell a lot
longer than I thought,” said Florence. “After the initial impact, I
got sucked up and fell again. As I was falling, I was pulling my
vest. I just fell a lot farther than I thought and my body was in a
weird position. I just slammed on my back on the bottom of the
barrel, which is just hard water. Right when I slammed, I just felt
kind of a snap in my lower back, right on my spine.”
Florence’s account is harrowing, the viewer feeling the crack of
vertebrae and resultant jump of his pulse as x-rays are taken.
Now, Florence has taken to social media to credit his powerlifting
routine for saving him from a life in a wheelchair.
“Deadlifts are to thank, I believe,” Florence told the
oft-controversial adult learner website The Inertia.
In the latest instalment of his wildly popular vlog, the twenty
eight year old breaks down the wave, the wipeout, accident and his
rehab program.
Essential.
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A daring young man almost stopped forever by a
howling savage wave!
Fashion model Koa Smith releases harrowing
POV footage of surviving “sixty-foot waves” at secret outer reef,
“I’m so grateful and psyched, I thought I was about to die!”
In this just-released edit, we are gifted ring seats to
the three-time NSSA champ, runner-up to Zeke Lau’s Ultimate Surfer
and part-time model Koa Smith charging like a bull at a
North Shore outer reef during the Eddie swell.
The behelmeted Smith is twenty-seven and, as you know, surfs
with the contented and dreamy look of the female suckling her
young.
In one instance, the young lion swings his board as the great
wave approaches and he turns his sad yellow eyes to the beach;
nothing is going to stop him, not even the growing fermentation in
his bowels.
“I woke up with with much fear this morning and having so many
thoughts of how easily I could’ve said, no I’m not going to go out
and let that fear determine what I was going to do… instead of
having a moment I’ll remember for the rest of my life.”
Essential.
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Laird Hamilton, a study in good health and
beauty for almost sixty years.
World’s sexiest over-fifty Laird Hamilton
reveals the fat-soaked diet, and home gymnasium, that keep him
wildly fit as he enters his harvest years, “The doctor was
covered in my blood, all over his mask. I could feel him yanking on
me!”
“What keeps me motivated is survival. Not
drowning!”
Earlier today, I watched a video of a a
well-proportioned almost sixty-year-old man, a superhuman some
might say, giving Men’s Health a tour of his fridge and
gymnasium.
Laird Zerfas (later, Hamilton, when his mammy split from daddy
and moved her and the boy to the North Shore where she married the
big-waver Billy Hamilton), who lives in Malibu in summer, Maui in
winter, explains his surprising diet, which is full of natural fats
and so on, his belief in supplements and, later, during a tour of
his gymnasium, his devotion to light therapy.
Why does he train so hard, take so much care of what he
eats?
“What keeps me motivated is survival. Not drowning!” says the
hyperbole-prone Hamilton, who also lists his myriad injuries,
including an ankle busted eight times, the replacement hip, the
smashed knee etc.
“I’m wounded,” he says.
A few years back, I asked Hamilton about getting the hip sawn
off and how he refused a general anaesthetic for the procedure and
later said no to painkillers.
“The doctor was covered in my blood, all over his mask,” he
remembered. “I could feel him yanking on me. I could feel pulsing
as he was doing shit to my leg. It wasn’t pain because they did a
spinal tap where they numb one leg. I called one of my buddies to
talk during the operation for amusement.”
One of a kind.
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Koa's pal hands him the exploding wetsuit
vest.
Hawaiian heartthrob and scion of North
Shore strongman Koa Rothman reveals myriads secrets, including an
exploding rubber suit, he uses to survive “fifty-foot Waimea
Bay!”
The rapidly-becoming legendary Koa Rothman on what
it takes to surf the world's most famous big-wave spot.
It is always difficult to turn the head away from Koa
Rothman, the youngest son of Fast Eddie and little brother
to big-waveworld champ and ukulele prodigy
Makua.
Rothman, twenty-nine, has a golden-brown glazed handsomeness
and, unlike most of the bigger name professional surfers, is sharp
enough to ad lib his way through twenty-five minutes or so of his
day-to-day life for his blog This is Livin’.
In this episode, which follows his travails as he surfs the
almost-Eddie swell at Waimea one week ago Koa reveals the double
knotted, double leash plug ensemble he uses to secures his leash to
his surfboard, the leash with a release tab so he can loose his
rhino chaser if it’s holding him in the impact zone and the
exploding rubber vest he’ll employs if things get real hairy.
