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Rumor: Dane’s new brand is “Former!”

Chas Smith

by Chas Smith

Finally! All is allegedly revealed!

How am I spitting such rad right now? How am I backing up post after post after sweet sugary post? Cuz I drunk foo! I dranking vodka black cherry sodas like they going out o style but sit down for a minute because I just figured out some hot hot hot hot hot hot stuff. Some Dungeons and Dragons level bizness. Some… like….. ummmm…. illuminati shit.

Remember Dane Reynolds’ and Craig Anderson’s super brand Destroyr? Remember how it died? And then came back to life? And then died?

Well it is totally alive now and not called Destroyr at all but now Former!

Like…..

FORMER!

Like…

Not LATTER!

And how do I know this?

Because back-masking.

Because I grew up in the era when bands would layer Satanic messaging into their albums.

Because vodka black cherry sodas.

Of course you have seen Dane Reynolds’ and Craig Anderson’s etc. film on Stab but have you played it all the way to the end when skaters Ausyn Gillette and the gorgeous Dylan Rieder show up and the music hammers? And the word “Former” floats at the top of the screen?

Watch it here!

And the name is so Former!

Right?

Yeah!

It’s such a stairway to heaven! So bustle in your hedgerow!

Will you buy?

Will you wear?

Will you thrill?

Of course you will!

Dane Reynolds is back and at Tilly’s soon!

Hope reigns supreme!