Finally! All is allegedly revealed!
How am I spitting such rad right now? How am I backing up post after post after sweet sugary post? Cuz I drunk foo! I dranking vodka black cherry sodas like they going out o style but sit down for a minute because I just figured out some hot hot hot hot hot hot stuff. Some Dungeons and Dragons level bizness. Some… like….. ummmm…. illuminati shit.
Remember Dane Reynolds’ and Craig Anderson’s super brand Destroyr? Remember how it died? And then came back to life? And then died?
Well it is totally alive now and not called Destroyr at all but now Former!
Like…..
FORMER!
Like…
Not LATTER!
And how do I know this?
Because back-masking.
Because I grew up in the era when bands would layer Satanic messaging into their albums.
Because vodka black cherry sodas.
Of course you have seen Dane Reynolds‘ and Craig Anderson’s etc. film on Stab but have you played it all the way to the end when skaters Ausyn Gillette and the gorgeous Dylan Rieder show up and the music hammers? And the word “Former” floats at the top of the screen?
And the name is so Former!
Right?
Yeah!
It’s such a stairway to heaven! So bustle in your hedgerow!
Will you buy?
Will you wear?
Will you thrill?
Of course you will!
Dane Reynolds is back and at Tilly’s soon!
Hope reigns supreme!
That clip will probably benefit Quik as much as Dane which is why Quik was so dumb to block sea of darkness, the surf industry was born on rebellion and your company will die without rebellion.
So Dane seems to have found his way and is doing what he wants to do and we get to benefit from it. Sounds like a win to me.
yeah, circus relevance only counts half though
Why bother? Dane made $3.5mln per year for 5 years. That’s a lot of (Mitt Romney 3%er) cash!! If he chose to live a quiet life in SoCal, wife, kid, surf a bunch, why push your luck and focus on a risky (in the long run) trend-fashion business that will likely eat up a chunk of all that cash. How about just be “proud of” the fact that you made $290k per MONTH for 5 years…just surfing?
what I devoutly hope is that he never, ever, ever goes in Kelly’s wave pool.
Hot vid of the year. Heaven forbid ‘former’ is actually a start up craft brewery producing overly hopped IPAs…if that happens sorry Dane but im fuckn out.
I’m calling this will be an online only type deal. I don’t see Dane and Craig etc dealing with endless sit down meetings with major retailers, talking about margin guarantees etc.
He needs a Petco sponsorship.
It’s funny. People who are critical of Dane bring up his weight quite a bit. What is he,some fucking Hollywood actress?
agreed, plus the guy had crippling anxiety for quite awhile there it sounds like, lets see what everyone else looks like after their house bound for a few months.
Informer A licky boom-boom down! Informer A licky boom-boom down!
Snow
Dane.. Your surfing inspires!
Fucking straight airs. Fucking yes.
busted a nut on that backside one around 5:45
hey hey i tried to let the cat outa the bag weeks ago no one ran with it..
Former is the last word to be written in a sequence that reads: “Typical Induction Suggestion, More Roaring, The Colorless System of Control And Easy Listening, brought to you by Former.”
I have no insider knowledge, however I would have thought that they wouldn’t refer to their new brand as a colorless system of control and easy listening?
#Fakenews #notmyjournalist
And not a single Hypto in sight
those weren’t exactly shortboards Ando was on, he’s gonna end up like Ozzie
nothing wrong with that…
It is short for Transformer in reference to Craig’s gender neutrality. I’ll still wear a tee though. I think all the boys behind it are self indulgent cunts but I still wanna be their mate.
once i saw Dion my stoke was reduced by 65%
hes globe for life, so maybe stick to not buying them instead – it works well for me.
i have a perfect record myself, love Taj and Hobgoods though
Have you ever noticed how your namesake looks like a sewn up fadge?
#Westworld
That was one Of the best surf vids I’ve watched in ages. Fat, over the hill, too cool for school hipster? Whatever you wanna call him, the cunt is still tearing an way more fun to watch than the wctslgbtqi any day. That made me want to go surf, welcome back fatty. Oop’s I mean Dane
“Former” – adjective or noun?
noun? opposite of destroyer?
Watch it here, cuz fuck Stab: http://www.monsterchildren.com
I thought it was phenomenal, and phenomenally self-aware.
And nicely dedicated to Dylan
Interviewer: “How’d you guys decide on the name?”
Dane: “I was thinking about how people might characterize my relevance to surfing in 2017, and it just made sense.”
nothing about that video was irrelevant. dane was slaying. who gives a shit about their most likely shitty company. dane is back. ripping waves to shreds. it feels as though the world has almost aligned
#rippingbutkindaforgotten
nah, come on. maybe for 14yr olds
Or rather, still popular with 41 year olds.
just had a bday in September, how’d you know?
Just a quick inversion of the digits you used and the fact that I have a 41-year-old homie who loves Dane… I claimed 31 as the new 13, now rocking 32 as the new 23. The fun stops next year though…until 41 is my new 14! 36 as the new 63 will suck.
former , is that like shaper?
No! It is like “wanker”.
Every man has experienced a dawn “Former”, whats important is how you shape it.