Faux/Real: The Back-Zip Wetsuit!
Ancient technology triumphs in wetsuit design.
If you would examine your current wetsuit, you’d find it to be a chest-zip or zipper-less suit. Am I right?
To get into these suits is a melodrama. You must squeeze your heft into a little hole, push one arm into a smaller hole, shimmy it up around your chest, fix first arm, then second, throw the flap over your head and so on. Its removal requires yogi-like dexterity.
Some years ago, all wetsuits came with a long zip from ass to neck. Entry was via a hole as big as your waist, not your neck, and the transaction was completed in a minute or less. It’s post-session removal was almost instant.
But then, partly through marketing (pressure on designers from their sales departments to give something new to push), partly through the need to create so-called advancements in technology (testing showed back zips were slightly more permeable than a neck entry), the back zip faded into memory.
A few weeks ago, I saw that Need Essentials had thrown a few back-zip steamers into their range. And, yesterday, while surfing with a pal in Leucadia he loaned me a one-year-old O’Neill Psychofreak with a back zip or, as its called by O’Neill, a “Zen Zip”.
It’s been a decade or so since I’d experienced the thrill of easily throwing on a suit. It was elevating.
And after the session, all it took to loose my torso into the sun was a one-handed rip of the neck closure and a yank of the zip.
I find the back zip so superior to either zipperless or the chest-zip that this hardly qualifies as faux or real.
But maybe I’m wrong.