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Tough Times. Surfline Turns to Prostitution.

Ooooh. Ooooooh. Yes. Your frontside reverse is so big. OOOOOOH! OOOOOOOOH! Douse me with spray. YES! YES! YEEEESSSSSSS!

It is no secret that our beloved surf community has fallen on the toughest of economic times. Stocks are down across the board. Jobs are being sacrificed and tear streaks mark the cheeks of those left behind. Even though financial advisors swear better times are near, the current horizon is bleak.

Surfline, surfing’s grandest website, is not content to sit still while the grim reaper (Hollister) comes and takes its weary soul (banner ads). The company has made its name by being futuristic. By applying the principles of science to the cutting-edge world of Internet possibility. Tres modern! But in a shocking twist, Surfline is turning to the world’s oldest profession to re-fill its coffers.

Yes, you and your friends can hire a professional Surfline photographer for a steamy day. He or she will follow you to the beach, post up under a scorching sun and snap, snap, snap away while you bog turns and while your friends get lipped in the head. Great for bachelor parties or just lonely moments when it feels like no one cares. The professional Surfline photographer will then send you a link with your photos and voila! Prostitution (innovative marketing)! And all starting at a mere $100.

Ooooh. Ooooooh. Yes. Your frontside reverse is so big. OOOOOOH! OOOOOOOOH! Douse me with spray. YES! YES! YEEEESSSSSSS!

Being photographed has never felt so sinfully wrong.

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4 Comments
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Loobs

I’ll happily pay double the fee if the photog will whip off his hat like the Professor in North Shore…

Chas Smith

I wish…but it spurned a thought! You and I can start the Harlequin Romance version, offering to pen the lusty thoughts of young surfers. “He saw the wave and trembled with desire…” We’d be millionaires like Marcus Sanders!

Nick Carroll

come on chas, don’t tell me you haven’t already taken advantage of this spectacular offer.

NEGATRON

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