Five bucks for a few ounces of salsa? Fuck that noise. I'm gonna make this shit myself from now on.
There are nine Mexican restaurants (at least, I may be missing one or two) in Kapa’a, the tiny little Kauai town I call home. It’s an absurd amount for our population, but they all manage to do a steady business, no doubt bolstered by the withdrawals felt by all us SoCal haole transplants. Nearly eight years in Hawaii and I still feel the itch.
Quality-wise, they run the gamut from merely mediocre, to outright fucking terrible. Which is ridiculous, Mexican food is among the easiest to make on Earth. Just burn some flank steak, chop it up and plop it on a tortilla, and drown that shit in some good salsa. It’s not brain surgery.
I found myself enraged beyond reason recently when I asked for more salsa to go with my twelve dollar unseasoned chicken and canned bean on store bought tortilla burrito, only to be informed it would be an additional five dollars.
Five bucks for a few ounces of salsa?
Fuck that noise. I’m done, I’m just gonna make this shit myself from now on.
With a little effort I’ve managed to dial in my salsa recipe. It’s fucking good. Really, really good. The best salsa you’ve ever tasted.
I’ve started making it in a big batch every few weeks, pouring it into mason jars, and actually enjoying good Mexi food on the regular. It’s surprisingly expensive, but only because I live where I do, and insist on only using the best locally grown ingredients.
Which, honestly, doesn’t really make that big of a difference. But it’s more fun.
“This salsa was prepared with only the finest local heirloom tomatoes and freshly harvested sweet onions.” Pointless but fancy.
2 x Large tomatoes, chopped (Like I said, I pick out the fanciest tomatoes on offer, but you can substitute cheap stuff without really noticing a difference. Pick ones that are slightly under ripe, they’ll be easier to work with.)
2 x 14.5 oz cans of plain diced tomatoes with no seasonings (Get the cheapest shit you can find. They’re all the same.)
4 x 6 Jalapeños, seeds and all (cut off the stems, obviously)
2 x Tablespoons fresh lime juice
1 x Tablespoon Cumin (This is key!)
5 x Garlic Cloves, minced
1 x large sweet onion
2 x Tablespoons salt (more or less, your choice. I use our fancy pants Hawaiian Alaea sea salt, finely crushed, but Morton’s works fine)
1 x Tablespoon red pepper flakes
1/2 Cup fresh cilantro, chopped
Blend until smooth.
If you over blend it may get a bit whipped and foamy, just pour it into your mason jars and let it settle for a while.
Now pour it over everything.