It is time to put childish things behind.
I grew, as I’ve written so many times, surfing very cold waves. I would wear two 3/2 wetsuits, one over the other, to try and beat the chill. I would always loose my booties and my feet would become dull stumps. It would take hours to regain body warmth afterward. Days even.
And, so, in my new Southern California existence I feel happy every day that it never gets truly “cold.” I never look at videos of cold waves and think, “I want to go there!” Except look at this! A beautifully shot little bit from a British man named Sharpy. Just look at it! Not the surfing but the waves themselves. Doesn’t it look dreamy? Doesn’t it make you want to strap on the armor? I feel that my style would be extremely conducive to these waves. A slow, lanky bottom turn and then up under the lip. Oh don’t worry. My hands would not shoot to the sky afterward. I would only feel shame that I wasn’t deeper.
And herein lies some very real talk. Be very honest with yourself. Have you ever done anything on a wave that was worth claiming? Have you ever surfed a wave to its maximum potential? Have you ever won the Eddie? Have you ever rotated, fully, in the air, hands free? Have you?
I understand the joyous reflex. The feeling that pumps through the veins when you have surfed a wave to the best of your ability but get a hold of yourself, man. The best of your ability is, on the grand scale, very much worse than Brett Simpson’s. What if he threw his hands up in triumph after getting 3/4 covered? We would laugh is what.
Yes, we, as a culture, are losing our ability to feel personal shame. Years of being told we are exceptional children has instilled too much confidence maybe. Too much pride in our own mediocre abilities. It is time to put on our contrition, like two 3/2 wetsuits, one over the other. Constricting? Certainly, but too bad for you. Too bad for me. If we want to be freed we can move somewhere warm and actually learn to surf really really really good.
*For anyone but Dane Reynolds, John John Florence, Kelly Slater and a small handful of others.
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Hooting your own waves is pretty bad. Pretty much the surfing version of “Another game for Milos!!”
Go to a pick up basketball game and see what happens after you get crossed-over. Some guys go right to shit talking, fist pumping, and chest bumping while others get back on D. In the NFL some guys do choreographed dance number for a TD others just hand the ball to the ref. I prefer the latter, but don’t begrudge the former. To me the claim is all about context: just you and the bros claim* all day, cameras and a crowd just go do it again. *All claims in Texas are purely satirical.
The stupid nicknames sufers give each other are worse. Markie, Boydie, Skindog, and Skippy, it sounds like a boyband gone wrong. I bet it was Skindog who was claiming like a complete cunt, but I haven’t the motivation to rewatch.
Seriously, is it even possible to put one wetsuit on top of another? And why didn’t Chas just buy a 5/4 instead? Let’s examine THOSE half-truths before we round on the cunt with the claims
It is true! I lived in Oregon with no surf shop and my cousins’ worn out 3/2s worked better than a dive suit. And I’m skinny.
man you must be old…was the internet invented back then?
As a poor grommet from the Favela. I to, used to rock the two wetsuit combo in the winter. 3/2 springsuit on the outside of my 3/2 steamer of course… had to show the world those flouro orange arms….
Woah woah woah, hang the fuck on. Don’t you be trying to steal us Brits’ cold water thunder. With the wavegarden having squibbed so damply it’s back to being our only point of difference (unless you count vanity footage of subpar Cornish professionals or achingly try-hard opinion pieces). If you’re flush enough to own two wetsuits then you’re no poor grommet in my books. When I were a lad it was a year-round 4/3 Alder Retard (fluoro, obvs) with porous seams and extra rub, paired with Dunlop Greenflash for the winter
.my suit is already built-in, if you know what I mean…
the vibe at this spot is all about fun and goofing off. the southern california cool-than-thou-brodown behaviour (or faux) is rightfully mocked here. claim away and laugh at each other over a pint.
The worst by far is the look-back-to-camera claim at 00:59.
I can testify to how cold Scotland is and it saps energy flaying your arms about in such a manner.
you are turning into a whiner, chas.
I think it is important to claim out in the lineup…It shows how cool you are and how good. Try it next time you’ll feel like a winner
Can we get over ourselves already and have fun?! Why can’t I outwardly enjoy myself while doing something I do for enjoyment? Because the grumpy old men riding boards way to small for them will get angry? Worrying about being cool as an adult is usually not cool. As far as competition claiming goes, a 9+ or a heat winner (even if its a 3) is ok to claim. The tour is a sport and thats what athletes do. What you do on your own time in the water is whatever you want (as long as you have etiquette and your not on a SUP).
The no claim is a too cool for school claim. Claiming for a score can eat a dick tho.
Fuck that guy bs in the video is annoying… act like you’ve been barreled before
When Chas expresses his inner Rory
Why do you hate the Brits so much Chas? I would say that it would be more embarrassing for JJF, Kelly etc to claim since they get barrelled every other day of their life.
because they have better teeth than he does.
Plebeian surfing is like sex: it feels a hell of a lot better than it looks and we’re never as deep as we think we are.
The claim is the cum shot. There are so many variations and even a beginner can emulate the pros.
.my after sex claim would be: “- see what i do, bitch? now, back to kitchen and make me a niner point sandwich…”
.my after sex claim would be: “- see what i do, bitch? now, back to kitchen and make me a niner point sandwich…”
Claiming was OK until Brazillions were given surfboards, now one must resist.
The best claim is paddling back out grinning.
Au contraire, I feel it is time to be more childish than ever. Let’s make 2016 the Year of Infantile Stupidity!
Donald Trump is betting on it!
Of course! But in the friend scenario you are really just waving to them…not claiming. Right?
I hoot when I get a good one, is that allowed?
yes i do the same only for a good barrel though. that is the only time its allowed.
If it’s truly claim worthy, others in the water or on the beach will do the claiming for you, it’s always more satisfying to hear it from your peers.
And if they get it on GoPro, it’s just the best: right?
GoPro yourself, the ultimate claim…
This should never be allowed ever all this says is “Look at me!”. and you are spot on with the peer approval claiming.
what if you’re surfing alone?
do people claim waves with no ones around? I usually talk to myself out loud
I usually sit there and sing the two or three Justin Bieber songs I know from his latest album. I swear there are drugs in that music.