The great Jimbo Pellegrine at Padang Padang in Bali. "My favorite places to surf are big hollow waves with lots of open face sections, such as Padang Padang, Desert Point, Pipeline, Middles and Cannons on Kauai,” he tells Chubstr.com, a website that promises “life in your size.”

Update: Jumbo Surfer officially “insane”!

Things are looking up for amputee jumbo surfer facing elony terroristic threatening charges!

Yesterday saw another Kauai court appearance for Jimbo Pellegrine, jumbo surfer, and things are looking good for him. Or, as good as things can look for a man who lost an arm in an auto collision and is staring down the barrel of felony terroristic threatening charges.

The temporary insanity approach is working, with two of the three examining doctors agreeing that, due to the severe nature of Jimbo’s injury, he lacked the mental wherewithal to be held responsible for his statements.

Good news for Mr Pellegrine, but he’s not exactly out of the woods yet.

The docs’ opinions serve as evidence, not grounds for dismissal. Essentially, Jimbo’s attorney will call the two shrinks who say he was nuts to testify, the state will call the odd man out. Whoever sways the jury wins.

The state is also appealing the suppression of Pellegrine’s blood test results, basing their arguments on the legal doctrine of “fuck the fourth amendment, cops should be able to forcibly take blood from people whenever they want for whatever reason they want. Also, warrants are for fags.”

An absolutely disgusting maneuver, considering how well the system is stacked in its own favor, as well as the fact that they, ostensibly, represent the interests of the public. Sure, vampire cops stealing blood is fucking great. Pigs breaking the rules because they’re incapable of properly performing their duties is even better.

But it’s not all good news for Mr Pellegrine. With his attorney, Mike Soong, currently vying for a soon-to-be-open judicial seat there’s a chance that Jimbo will need to find himself a new top-notch legal mind.

Which would be a real pain in the ass halfway through an ongoing case.

Meanwhile, click here to watch Jimbo shred!

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TheBrianator88
TheBrianator88
2 years ago

This guy is a fat fucking insane psychopath with titties unsuckable, these days, he’s roaming the streets of Ukiah, California in the Pear Tree Center and is probably banned from every fucking store he ever went to for harrassing and threatening people and workers like a fucking shit-bag all because he lost his arm and expects us to feel bad for him doesn’t give him the right to treat others however the fuck he wants. Go back to the nuthouse where you belong and I hope you drop the fucking soap Jimbo Jackass

Bragu Moy
Bragu Moy
10 years ago

How many pounds does an arm weight?

Captain Clark
Captain Clark
10 years ago

He’s not fat, he’s “Huskey”. Something I have always been curious about, why do overweight people wear spandex? Another thing is why do “big boned” girls wear bikinis? It’s not visually appealing to most guys. I mean the jumbos’ need loving too, but i have only met a small handful of dudes that are into fatties. Most all of us are visually turned on by chick’s in revealing gear, but they can’t honestly think they are in that category.

Wiggolly's Paddling Style
Wiggolly's Paddling Style
10 years ago
Reply to  Captain Clark

I’m not talking about fat chicks here. I’m more talking about those ones that are probably going to be fat after they have kids….. I personally like that the booty culture has made these chicks slut up a bit. I used to not even look at a chunkier girls rigs but now I’m all about the big booty bitches. Just wouldn’t marry one.

Captain Clark
Captain Clark
10 years ago

And who isnt? I like me a nice big ass, but I’m referring to the beached whale category. The ones that you have to powder down to find the wet spot. Like the rolls have rolls kind. My mind always thinks about hygiene when I see that. It tells me there is cheesecake covered rashes under there with a whole very isolated yet diverse set of critters living symbiotic lives in those folds. Then I vomit a little in my mouth and ask, why are you wearing that?

Wiggolly's Paddling Style
Wiggolly's Paddling Style
10 years ago
Reply to  Captain Clark

Very apt and disgusting description, I like it. I feel so sorry for those people because they have their biggest insecurity on show for their entire lives. It’s so much easier to hide genital herpies.

Captain Clark
Captain Clark
10 years ago

True, now I’m having that feeling I always get right after my mind tells me these things. That feeling of realizing that yes, I am an ass hole. For hiding the herpes I have found that a really robust (cover up) ladies makeup works well. “Maybe its maybelline? Maybe she’s born with it?” That was their slogan on the TV commercials for years..it had a catchy jingle too, but covers even the most aggressive outbreak.

Wiggolly's Paddling Style
Wiggolly's Paddling Style
10 years ago
Reply to  Captain Clark

Even the robust stuff comes off after a birds been slobbering on it. I try to convince them to keep going because the damage is already done but many are too angry to be reasonable.

Karl Von Fanningstadt
Karl Von Fanningstadt
10 years ago

“Biggest insecurity on show for their entire lives.” When I read this, I immediately thought of people who habitually ride fishes.

Ron Weasley
Ron Weasley
10 years ago
Reply to  Captain Clark

I vomited a little just then as well.

Karl Von Fanningstadt
Karl Von Fanningstadt
10 years ago

Up vote for big booty… and I’m easy

Ron Weasley
Ron Weasley
10 years ago
Reply to  Captain Clark

I hit a 30 yo fatty when I was in NZ a few years ago as a rather drunk 18 yo… Fuck me that cost me a set of clothes, wallet and almost missed my plane home. But geez it was good.

paddymick
paddymick
10 years ago

His version of events is a fairly entertaining read http://surfingflow.com/worl…

Swaveanddeboner
Swaveanddeboner
10 years ago
Reply to  paddymick

That was a horrendous struggle to read, but worth it.

shootsthen
shootsthen
10 years ago

So . . . according to his story, it wasn’t his fault that he got into a few car accidents that eventually led to his arm getting ripped off; the ambulance workers tried to kill him; and all people on Kauai are dumb and out to get him? Poor guy.

Swaveanddeboner
Swaveanddeboner
10 years ago
Reply to  shootsthen

Pretty much…I found the sheer chutzpah of his claims and the imagery of a Kauai crawling with crackheads and heroin addicts on the nod quite entertaining.

Neah Kah Nie Pirate
Neah Kah Nie Pirate
10 years ago

Men of today are not molded from personal trainers. Mostly, they are the result of genetics, mild bulimia and methamphetamine addiction. Personal trainers just exploit the angst and emotional weakness prevalent in Western culture.

What?

Some fat fuck can’t climb onto a bicycle without some asshole stroking them with insincere compliments and paid-for encouragement?

Usually, after the birth of his fourth child, by his third baby momma, the dude gains some weight and suffers a bit of post-alcoholism depression. His wife becomes emotionally distant and only chooses coitus reluctantly from the doggy position… rendering the dude to feeling “a little chunky.” In an effort to lose weight and gain self-esteem he starts down the personal trainer path.

Unlike his wife, the personal trainer is soothing, supportive and oh so attentive. After several weeks of mutual bro-flirting, the personal trainer bangs him in the back of his raised Tundra. Only the Salty Crew stickers witness this abomination. This physical relationship escalates quickly into a torrid affair, complete with unprotected sex and sandy sphincters. Then, during a particularly robust session of lovemaking on the gym floor the dude catches his hand in the inclined walking machine.

Long story short… the hand becomes infected, prompts a doctor visit, followed by a staph diagnosis and the eventual amputation of the hand.

After massive medical bills and the inevitable confession to the affair, the dude’s wife leaves him for a Romanian sword swallower who performs on stage for Cirque Du Soleil with military-grade pepper spray.

The dude, once a successful upper middle-class commenter on BeachGrit and one of 50 IP addresses cited by the WSL as a “fan,” is now the only single-handed El Pollo Loco shift manager in Tarzana.

Dumb Florida Redneck
Dumb Florida Redneck
10 years ago

what the fuck

Wiggolly's Paddling Style
Wiggolly's Paddling Style
10 years ago

I don’t like compliments but that was really entertaining. Thank you. You have a unique mind.

DrLeonardRockstein
DrLeonardRockstein
10 years ago

HAIL SATAN!

bitter guy
bitter guy
10 years ago

least its not the Chatsworth location

Bragu Moy
Bragu Moy
10 years ago

Could you elaborate?…

Wiggolly's Paddling Style
Wiggolly's Paddling Style
10 years ago

I think the doctor who doesn’t agree should have his arm ripped off and test his own theory. It’s a pretty bloody extreme injury. Yanqui pigs lack understanding and make up some ridiculous charges – “terroristic threatening”? They jailed yours truly for three days for “criminal mischief”. I thought they were going to give me a simple spanking but they fuckin took me to court and kept me in the US for 2 months. Paid about $6000 in legal fees and the outcome was I had to pay $92 restitution. Why the fuck would someone be sent to jail for $92? Saudi Arabian fucks.

Ron Weasley
Ron Weasley
10 years ago

Criminal mischief? Can you elaborate please Wiggs

Bragu Moy
Bragu Moy
10 years ago
Reply to  Ron Weasley

Your average bogan Friday night out….

Wiggolly's Paddling Style
Wiggolly's Paddling Style
10 years ago
Reply to  Ron Weasley

I threw a cash register. Wasn’t great.

Ron Weasley
Ron Weasley
10 years ago

It kind of sounds great but I’ll take your word for it.

velobwoy
velobwoy
10 years ago

I love that you’re married to an attorney.

Rory Parker
Rory Parker
10 years ago
Reply to  velobwoy

I love it too!

Trogan Fan
Trogan Fan
10 years ago

As a member of the public, I fully support the taking of blood from any fat fuck who just ripped his own arm off while driving.

bitter guy
bitter guy
10 years ago
Reply to  Trogan Fan

if the cops put a bucket under it and tested what fell in, they have a decent argument that he had no reasonable expectation of privacy in his bodily fluids at that point, because he was in public at the time. would get it in no problem in TX or AZ.


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