One healthy motherfucking bicep straight outta Kauai! Bethany Hamilton! Yes!
Ain’t Tyler Wright just the future of surfing? Such power! So thighs! Except do you want to know what trumps thighs? One healthy motherfucking bicep straight outta Kauai.
Bethany Hamilton!
I’ve spent more time with Bethany than would be common. We hung out at the Presidential Prayer Breakfast, for example. And ummmm Oceanside. And while her public thing may slightly annoy she is fierce when Obama is sitting next to her and rages a wave.
Cloudbreak!
I’ve spent more time with Bethany than would be common. We hung out at the Presidential Prayer Breakfast, for example. And ummmm Oceanside. And while her public thing may slightly annoy she is fierce when Obama is sitting next to her and rages a wave.
Can you believe it? Just watch her. Watch her tear the heart out of the future of surfing with one arm digested in a shark who, if I recall, got caught by fishermen and hung. I don’t recall because I never watched Soul Surfer.
In any case, I’m camping in the backyard of a mega celebrity right now. Channing Tatum is here. Rockin bod but moon face!
Except do you want to know what trumps backyard mega celebrity camping? One motherfucking palmaris longus straight outta Lihue!
I’ve sat far away from everyone watching her on video. Watching her mock our shared expectations.
Tell us more about channing?.. There must be more to your encounter, possibly you were a couple vodcast and sodas deep when you decided to deliver this snippet
We had a funny talk about three year olds. I told him I’m trying to get mine put on a terrorist watchlist. And it was watermelon lemonade tequila cocktails!
Your move Jimbo Pellegrine.
Very very very funny.
After that bomb she caught the other day you really can’t tar her with that brush.
I do like how Fiji really shines a torch on how shit most of the waves are on the tour. The quality of the surfing is almost unrecognizable when they actually get put out in something good.
so good to see a goofy surfer ripping, i think goofy footers are under represented in the sport
That’s pretty cruel Wigg…
Ahh rats! My apologies Nega and Tyler. If it’s any consolation, she looks kinda hot in her new WSL photo.
shit whatever you wrote must have been gnarly if you or negs deleted it!
BeachGrit wrote about Bethany’s missing appendage and I wrote that perhaps Tyler had an extra appendage which has been removed. If I had of written it about Silvana Lima or Keala Kennelly perhaps it would’ve got the green light but it is what it is. Negatron felt I was cruel and I accept that.
Tyler surfs too well ….. Gotta leave her alone
Why would she have had it removed?
To be allowed to compete on the women’s tour?
this is a rich vein of form Chas.
Again, i don’t want to sound repetitive, but your shit is gold. And BH, i just tuned in for a sec to see some of the rd 3 heat 1, and she paddles fast as f*ck, like really fast. Shit is crazy.
What a delightfully sensitive headline.
…here’s interesting. The ABC (Australia), a fortress of PC speak, led with the same headline! But! Forty minutes later changed it! Exhibit A here.
…and shortly afterwards it became…
well I guess the problem is that rather than being an amputee, she got her arm bitten off by a fucken tiger shark.
So it should read…… Tyler Wright eliminated by girl who got her arm bitten off by a fucken tiger shark in Fiji Pro
No. You’ve got the subject and object fucked up. Try: “Tyler Wright eliminated in Fiji Pro by girl who got her arm bitten off by a fucken tiger shark.” I thought more highly of you Seaman Staines. Fucken disgrace.
Hey I’m a Kiwi living in Australia so your abuse of me is potentially a hate crime.
Well that at least explains your appalling treatment of the English language.
Said no Aussie, ever.