Steph Gilmore? Anastasia Ashley? Wrong! Come meet Palmer from Queensland!
Oh there is no doubt you’ve seen the video of Kelly Slater Golden Ticket winners by now. Maybe on Surfline. Your beloved BeachGrit does a great job of breaking painful and/or funny rumor but we are slow, usually, to the sensitive dance.
Here I am now though! Late but dabbing my eyes with a hanky!
And just look at Rob and Palmer. Two average men growing up in the heartland. One dreams of being a football star. The other is debutante backseat of Jacky’s car (what does that even mean?). And there they were going about their days. Suckin’ on chili dogs outside the Tastee Freeze. Maybe sittin’ on someone’s lap, hand between knees.
But then there is a knock at the door and a lady with a voice as dumb as finless surfing is pushing an iPhone right directly up their noses. Like, at the worst angle possible, asking questions before telling them that they are the lucky winners! They get to crouch in a never chocolate barrel!
Rob lives very near me. I may in fact know him, or have at least seen him in the water, but certainly won’t be bugging for a chance to join. My ex-wife lived very near Lemoore and if I never have to smell those stinky cows again I’ll be better for it.
But if Palmer asked me I would scream YES while giving him the biggest hug ever! Cow stink and ex-wife we damned!
Have you ever seen a more touching reaction to good fortune? The way those teddy bear eyes sparkle before he wipes the tears of happy away. The way his smile is so big and so filled with pure emotion. The way his whole face radiates and I just want to scoop him into my arms and whisper in his ear, “Rabbi Kushner was right, bad things do happen to good people. But sometimes, some crazy times, good things happen too my sweet baby boy.”
When was the last time you wept from joy, you crusty hard-hearted bastard?
Really?
Well, that is probably why you didn’t win the Golden Ticket.
The last time I wept with joy, was when Gabby proved that men too, can shave their pits and its totally cool. I felt a huge burden was lifted on society.
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
http://i.imgur.com/cwiqqfE….
I weep for joy every time Gabby loses a heat.
Take a picture of your face and send! You may just unseat dear Palmer! Basically as good as winning a Golden Ticket!
How could I ever dream of unseating dear Palmer in his moment of glory? I am not so cruel. Consider: many are those who rejoice at Gabby’s losses, but how many get to celebrate a “golden ticket” to Kelly’s wave? No, the moment is yours, Palmer!
So basically they’ll be the ones that fall and make them reset the plow that takes 2 hours which is why it’s commercially impossible to reproduce at a viable wave per hour system making it useless?
Don’t say that about my Palmer!
How are the five daughter’s doing?
Naegleria fowleri
From old Surfline artlicle: “We’re a little bit limited by property size — the actual lake is 2000 feet long — and the scope of how I really wanted to do the bottoms, but I’m pretty happy with it. It’s unbelievably fun and cool lookin’.”
Eventually it may be multiple pools on one property, longer pools with lully spots to end/start waves, or circular pools,with endless wave Who knows? I think you can build your own wave pool for less than one might assume.
It’s a snowcat hooked up to a system similar to what they trawl the bottom with in large commercial fishing operations. Only they don’t have to drag the net backwards, like they do with the plow that creates turbulence so the pool has to settle for a whole hour to get that ” perfect” look honestly i think they are blowing it by not having a diffuser on the side where the wave is washing up similar to acoustics ya know? Would stop a lot of issues but heres the deal, it’s a snow cat, towing an angled plow,boom.
The patents are fun to read
http://patft.uspto.gov/neta…
Commercial fishing snowcat is how I want to sell my wave pool. So good!
If I’d of known this 10 yrs ago i would have spent my entire credit card budget on hefty bags,a back-ho and a snowcat and a modfied floating dock.