The Inertia: Blame Trump on Slater!

Surf media's killer dog rounds on champ!

The anguish today keeps pouring down. The funeral procession of our theoretical better selves enveloped in a never ending wail.

Like this!

Even the best of pals are torn asunder by our new political reality. Even idols brought low by those who used to gaze up with only the utmost admiration.

Let us examine the case of one Robert Kelly Slater and The Inertia‘s founder-in-chief Zach Weisberg.

Oh you know how surfing’s definitive online community adores the champ. We all do, of course, but The Inertia more than adores. Maybe worships a little. Maybe wants to marry on a Kauai cliff during sunset with Don Ho as master of ceremonies (presented by Purps).

But the spectre of Donald J. Trump threw a big old monkey wrench (spanner) into the machinations of love today. Really derailed the works.

Let us read from Mr. Zach’s dirge:

Nothing is given, and liberals forgot that the same way disenchanted conservatives remembered it. As such, progressives failed to tap into the same dormant emotions that drive America to be its greatest.

I regret that The Inertia failed to make a formal presidential endorsement this election. It doesn’t matter that it most likely wouldn’t have any impact. But it could have. In my estimation, it was the right thing to do, because it was an expression of how I, as a leader, and The Inertia staff, as a collective, feel with a renewed obligation in communicating to our 1.5 million monthly readers.

I regret that we didn’t take Kelly Slater, a man I deeply respect as surfing’s most influential ambassador, to task for choosing not to vote in this year’s election despite hosting an art show to inspire political conversation. In my estimation, that’s a disingenuous thing for a thoughtful person to do. Voting is a privilege our forefathers died to preserve, and while I respect anyone’s right to refuse to participate, for those who care about the environment (surfers and outdoor enthusiasts) and social justice (thoughtful people), there was an appropriate choice on this year’s ballot.

It was not Donald Trump.

So my favorite part is The Inertia making a formal presidential endorsement a way to also let potential advertisers know how much “traffic” they’re getting.

Capitalism!

But the part that brings a lonely tear to my eye is the thought of Zach W taking Kelly Slater to task. Don’t give in to your baser prog Huffy Post instincts, dearest Z.

Let Kelly vote for Kelly and Let Love Rule!