It's ok world... our white knight will come riding in to save us!
Oh a profound sadness is washing over America today and, I suppose, in certain inland corners a wild jubilation too. Election day is over and Kelly Slater did not win even though he posted a picture on his wonderful Instagram account of a ballot where his name has been written in. “BTW this is not my ballot…” Kelly added alongside the post. “Someone sent it to me.”
Oh yeah! Totally!
But the question remains… what will Kelly do to spoil Trump’s victory? Let us recall his most recent attention grabbing triumphs
After Adriano won a hard fought crown Kelly unleashed his perfect barrel on the world. So effective was the pulled spotlight that I can’t, to this day, remember The Little Plumber’s last name.
After John John won Kelly went on to the socials and called Jordy Smith the best current surfer in the world.
And now Trump has won, besting Kelly maybe 58,000,000 to 4 but certainly our heart’s champion has something up his wizard’s sleeve. Will he…
a) Post a selfie standing next to Vladimir Putin with the hashtag #biggerfasterstronger.
b) Win the Jaws event riding tandem with Cam Diaz.
c) Open a wavepool on Pennsylvania Avenue, Washington D.C. with gold water instead of brown.
d) Build a wall along the U.S. – Mexico border made entirely out of wavepools.
e) Announce his candidacy.
f) Post a selfie standing next to Canada’s Justin Trudeau with the hashtag #mosthandsomeleaderintheworld.
g) Build a wavepool on the floor of the New York Stock Exchange with green water instead of brown.
h) Announce that he has single-handedly brought peace to the middle east.
i) By building a wavepool in Jerusalem where both the Jew and the Arab can surf for 50 shekels an hour.
j) All of the above.
… what a fugazi!!!
Did anyone pick the ‘interesting’ choice of music to close Trump’s Acceptance Speech? ‘You can’t always get what you want’ by the Stones…. (albeit the Angelic overture).
hmmmmmmmmmm?
i blame John John. as if Trump hasn’t spent his whole life modelling himself on our hero John. do the math people.
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Twins? Or is it the same person not sure??
WSL does control the free world
Interesting, now that you mention it, I have never seen the two of them together, at the same time. Ummm. This could be something. They share a certain douchery. Perhaps
Bedtime for democracy.
Not everyone is sad. By the count I’d say more people are happy rather than sad. I for one I’m happy with the outcome. I get to keep my guns! All of them, including my assault rifle. I hope that really pisses people off!
No one was going to hurt your poor guns….just your feelings
My guns aren’t poor and I’m offended that you would say such a heartless thing. As to my feelings, I’m feeling pretty good right about now. Winning has a way of doing that.
What do you do with an assault rifle? Pose in the mirror and pretend you are Rambo and try to forget how inadequate your cock is?
What did you win?
Last turkey shoot I won two cans of corn, and a turkey. Would have gotten the big prize had my suppressor not gotten hot.
damn those suppressors , or is that a Freudian slip?
…what you won?
The Beach Grit fairies have granted you your wish. That really pisses me off!
This just in from Hillary’s instagram: Hora de ir pra casa. Muito triste, eu dedico ou dediquei minha vida pra isso…to cansado, cansei!
I don’t speak the Spanish, but I do know one Spanish word…victorioso! Means winning in English.
Looking at the popular vote total, more voters lost than won. More people voted for Hillary, less people voted for Trump and yet he is the winner. So by the count, I’d say more people are sad rather than happy. But yay for your guns I guess.
Yep, Yay for me all around! Too bad the popular vote isn’t the one that counts.
i hope you like pollution
I’m glad you understand that. Next, figure out how numbers work. Your logic: there are more supporters of A than B, therefore there are more supporters of B. Which is dumb as shit, and I’m beginning to suspect that you are as well.
It’s not my logic there sport, just how it is with Electoral votes. It’s the only one that matters, didn’t say I liked it, but it remains a fact.
No one mentioned electoral votes. You said “By the count I’d say more people are happy rather than sad.” I said “No, you’re wrong, you don’t understand basic math, and also, you’re an idiot.” Or were you talking about electoral votes being happy or sad?
I’m not giving you anymore fish merman, you’ll have to catch your own from here on out.
I’ll be fine. Make sure to wear a helmet anytime you leave your bed you dense fuck.
Fuckyou and your guns.
what do you shoot with your guns?
Recently it’s been throwing cans up in the air and hip shooting them several times in a row, like Yosemite Sam.
I have soup for dinner.
Put the can on your head.
Any surfer that voted for Trump and his stated intentions (albeit poorly defined) to gut the EPA, the Clean Water Act, and industrial wastewater regs should be restricted to surfing urban rivermouths within 72 hours of a major rain event.
at barra da tijuca, no less…
Trump is just a means to an end. Good to see the US electorate giving the middle finger to the elitist, lefty so-called progressive bullies. The US has been in moral decline for years, just research the symptoms of any ‘civilisation’ on the brink of collapse and you’ll find crazy hedonistic laws to please everyone and everything. The US dodged a bullet and all the silent republican voters know this.
Right on, I think the proof is here in this comment section. Lefties talk progression and acceptance, until you disagree. Then not so much. I think I even got a F-u here and several up votes for that comment. The problem can be surmised with one word out of your comment…silent…we don’t have to be silent anymore. Socialism is dead, atleast for 4 years.
Saul Alinksy – just to a bit of research into this guy. The whole radical leftist ideology will make more sense.
Clinton & her pedo pals lost. All the hedos,pedos & pornos are protesting in the streets for their porn cocaine democrat leaders; like a bunch of sick addicts; claiming they support women’s rights but are really interested in woman’s slavery, including leso Hillary & her pedo leso Al Qaeda Jew carpet licker Huma Weiner whose family runs Torah Wahhabi groups. They speak on TV we support freedom &, as they rort the system, the monkeys without reason addicted to bananas believe their pedo Joo communist amoral heros & servants. Both Donald Trump and former President Bill Clinton have ties to convicted pedophile and Democratic donor, billionaire [Jooboy] Jeffery Epstein and “Sex Slave Island.”
What kind of surfboard would Trump ride?!
14ft hydro foil sup mowing down everyone in the line up while wearing an American Flag speedo
Trump would ride a jetski. A big fucking ski with a wild dukes of hazard/American flag paint job. It would be the loudest ski you’ve ever heard, and he’d be constantly monitoring his peak for any of those dirty Mexican’s trying to inconspicuously float their way into the lineup.
Make American lineups great again!
He’ll tow that ski to the boat launch behind this wonder of imagination https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
CI Trumpster driver:
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A foil board with Laird as his tow partner.
…remember the guy motorbiking teahupoo? that kinda craft…