Kelly Slater Justin Jay
"I watched Kelly amble around his house in a perpetual state of motion like a shark that would die if it stopped moving." | Photo: Justin Jay/@justinjayphoto

Series: Kelly Slater at his North Shore home!

See Kelly wear a funny outfit, feel the intense pitch of his ultra-competitiveness!

All this week, we’ve drip-fed the North Shore location work of NYC shooter Justin Jay. With the notable exception of Steve Sherman, there ain’t a soul who records the North Shore’s casual narrative as comprehensively or expertly as Justin.

Today, we peel open the curtain to the world of Kelly Slater, 11-timer etc.

(As revealed by Mr Justin Jay.)

“Kelly Slater’s living room is, basically, the backstage of the North Shore. Nestled behind a nondescript gate is his comfortably-appointed hangout for surfing’s elite. It was a rainy contest lay day and I had dropped by to give Kelly a gift print. While the other guests relaxed, exchanged stories and laughed, I watched Kelly amble around his house in a perpetual state of motion like a shark that would die if it stopped moving. Kelly disappeared into the other room for a few minutes and then returned wearing a ridiculously futuristic apparatus strapped to his shoulder, which turned out to be some sort of a high-tech muscle stimulator.

“In most scenarios, anyone entering a room wearing this contraption would be subject to ridicule. But it was painfully obvious that I didn’t have the proper status to comment about Kelly’s bizarre accessory and, clearly, it would be an act of hubris on my part to do so. Not sure how to react, I averted my eyes the floor. Benji Weatherly however, is Kelly’s peer and close friend. He also happens to be a world-class wisecracker. He couldn’t pass up the opportunity to lob some friendly barbs toward the 11-time world champion. Kelly appeared to brush off the remarks, but he did leave the room shortly after and returned wearing a plush Baja striped-blanket hoodie reminiscent of the one Jeff Spicoli wore in Fast Times, albeit perfectly fitted, and obviously quite expensive.
“Meanwhile, I eavesdropped while Kai Lenny described how his windsurfing skills came in handy while pulling airs on a 40-foot wave at Jaws. Shane Dorian lounged on the couch while his son Jackson taught Benji the fundamentals of chess. Jackson’s primer on game strategy and the significance of the King and Queen contained a few flawed interpretations. Benji was willing to keep his kid gloves on for the 10 year old and simply play along, but upon hearing the conversation, Kelly’s competitive gene kicked in. Perhaps he sensed blood in the water. He pried himself away from making his organic pancakes and strolled over to correct the young contestant and give his input on what Benji’s next move should be.”
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nyc surfing golden boy
nyc surfing golden boy
9 years ago

i always liked benji, its just he would never shut the fuk up for once…

Louis P
Louis P
9 years ago

The photo caption to end all photo captions.

Otto
Otto
9 years ago

I miss the good ol’ days when someone asked you if you wanted pancakes and you didn’t ask them if they were organic.

Captain Clark
Captain Clark
9 years ago

For a second there I thought that might be the kings offspring, but quickly realized it wasn’t. It is Dorian’s rader than rad son, of which he spends actual time and effort with. Wonder if the king even notices the sharp contrast between himself and a legit father. That would require him to remove his head from his own arse hole though, something I don’t see happening.

Otto
Otto
9 years ago
Reply to  Captain Clark

someone here has daddy issues.

Captain Clark
Captain Clark
9 years ago
Reply to  Otto

I’d say so. I have an awesome pops and try to be that for my 2 kids. You don’t find it odd that the king seemingly has nothing to do with his kid? All his fame, wealth, and accomplishments yet it seems there is nothing there with his kid. I could be wrong, pure speculation. Nice try though at cutting me down. Is your dad not part of your life?

Kellysthirdtesticle
Kellysthirdtesticle
9 years ago
Reply to  Captain Clark

Or maybe he doesn’t want to be one of those insufferable cnuts who media manage their children’s lives by creating instagram accounts for them and inviting media to their kids 6th birthday. Perhaps he just loves his daughter without having to publicize it.

Captain Clark
Captain Clark
9 years ago

Perhaps, but I doubt it. Although, I wouldn’t put it past him to disregard the existence of said child as some sort of passive aggressive denial. Don’t you think that the most sought after surfer in the world by the surfing media would slip up from time and time. A super sneaky photographer capturing a glimpse here and there seems more likely. You don’t see that, nor one single post of proud dad buying the alleged child a mini tesla for its 5 birthday. Just saying.

Tired old guy
Tired old guy
9 years ago
Reply to  Captain Clark

Like Larry Bird giving his daughter a signed basketball after 18 years of denying her existence ….classy

Captain Clark
Captain Clark
9 years ago
Reply to  Tired old guy

Exactly. Having relatives that have abandoned their kids, I find it repulsive. The kids are victims, and what I have seen turn out to be scarred for life. Some on here would rather turn a blind eye and continue to grovel at Kelly’s feet, but not me. I’m not shy about calling a spade a spade.

Otto
Otto
9 years ago
Reply to  Captain Clark

(rhetorical) Not even a little bit shy?

Otto
Otto
9 years ago
Reply to  Captain Clark

I have an awesome dad as well. He’s a good man. And yes, he’s part of my life. The thing is I haven’t given KS’s situation with his kid any thought. Its far too much a barney move as far as I’m concerned to formulate an opinion on a matter I know nothing about. I reckon KS’s story with his kid is far more complicated than it would appear from what anyone could gather from things they see, or don’t see, in the surf media. My comment was directed towards your issue with his “daddy-ness”, and I borrowed a cliché to make it.

Captain Clark
Captain Clark
9 years ago
Reply to  Otto

I make no apologies for questioning his daddy hood. Kelly has turned into an aging man who can’t seem to deal with the fact his grip on the sport is loosening. What’s worse is he does it in the most snide, passive aggressive ways.

Island Hopper
Island Hopper
9 years ago
Reply to  Captain Clark

I have seen video of Kelly being interviewed and he is pretty candid about his limited parenting, and the regret seemed genuine.

Captain Clark
Captain Clark
9 years ago
Reply to  Island Hopper

Juicy! Do reply with the link so I might relish his moaning.

Island Hopper
Island Hopper
9 years ago
Reply to  Captain Clark
Captain Clark
Captain Clark
9 years ago
Reply to  Island Hopper

Bless you. The regret might be real, but the squirming is too good. At least he didn’t dodge the question.

Jocks
Jocks
9 years ago

Dale dug a hole. Tell ’em Dale.
I dug a hole.

Kennypowersmullet
Kennypowersmullet
9 years ago

how do i become the next justin jay? i have an iphone and an ok digital camera.
point an shoot is my speciality. i am not from new york though. does this hinder my application?

The Bitchy Crab
The Bitchy Crab
9 years ago

Prefixing a photographer’s name with NYC or LA-based, Berlin, Paris or Barcelona’s etc really does add a little something don’t you think?

Kennypowersmullet
Kennypowersmullet
9 years ago

Of course, anything from NYC etc sounds much more legit.
east coast of oz just doesn’t give me the credit i totally deserve.
simply makes everyone automatically think i’m just a bogan with a camera

DrunkenAngel
DrunkenAngel
9 years ago

NYC Trump?

Michael Ciaramella
Michael Ciaramella
9 years ago

I never tire of Kelly-being-petty stories.

plug-butt
plug-butt
9 years ago

I tire regularly about a third of the way through majority of your articles.

Dooma
Dooma
9 years ago
Reply to  plug-butt

I vote Justin Jay insights/retold via Derek Reilly as the new writer for Beachgrit. Fire Mike and the other guy exactly like Mike.

plug-butt
plug-butt
9 years ago
Reply to  Dooma

Which other guy we talking aboot here?

Dooma
Dooma
9 years ago
Reply to  plug-butt

Jake. I had to scroll down to find the answer which I couldn’t be fucked before but seeing how you asked.

Captain Bee Fart
Captain Bee Fart
9 years ago

With the exception of one-upmanship, is there any other kind of Kelly story?


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