Dane and Craig Former
I think, just the right amount of insouciance and daring.

Help: We were bullied by surf mags!

Former's Dane Reynolds and Craig Anderson kicked around by the rotten surf media!

And are you as thrilled as I am for the impending launch of super brand Former? Dane Reynolds, Craig Anderson and Austyn Gillette’s surf/street collection described by Derek Rielly as “neither revolutionary nor radically aggressive but who wants to wear poom-poom shorts and off-the-shoulder tees?”

It almost a wonderful day in surf fashion!

Except there has been some chop in Former’s sea. Some unnecessary wobble. The brand, you see, has been bullied! And bullied by none other than the surf media!

It all started when Former was allegedly being called Destroyer except the boys, as it is rumored, had not actually secured either the trademark nor the URL destroyer.com. The way I heard it told, and this is pure coco wireless so… you know… but the way I heard it told Stab thought they were going to get all BeachGritty by breaking a rumor. They broke the rumor and the man who owned destroyer.com, who was going to sell it for a hundred bucks or something, read the story and jacked his price to ten thousand bucks or something because he saw fame and fortune in his future.

Poor Dane!

Poor Craig!

Stab disappeared the story, as they do because they are chicken, but it was too late and back to the drawing board and then Former… which sings even more, don’t you think?

If that wasn’t bad enough, days ago I was poking around and saw former.xxx was up. Oh, I didn’t see anything other than a Rorschach sunset (sunrise?) but was so excited that I posted a story anyhow. What could the .xxx mean? What is actually coming?

I left it alone, bubbling with anticipation, but BeachGrit commenter Extreme Nonchalance wasn’t as patient as me and found the website was actually live! Hiding in plain sight!

The joy! I spent a few minutes looking at the collection, Derek wrote a review and Adam Jara tried to buy a shirt. But then my phone starting ringing and texts started flying from the brand’s manager. “Take it down! We haven’t launched yet!”

“But the website…” I thought to myself “…It’s live. Hiding in plain sight.” I tried to return the calls to explain that if we took down our cute little post down it would look worse than leaving it up and let’s spin it in a wonderful way etc. but no answer and the clothes were insouciant and excitement palpable and let’s not rob the surf community of joy in these dark days.

Then a text. “Na it’s fine. You guys will probably record our conversation and post it anyways. Well just launch earlier. No biggie.”

The paranoia stung. I would never record a conversation and post it anyways… or wait. But that’s not the point. The point is:

Poor Craig!

Poor Dane!

Now they have to scramble and get live well before they were ready. And ain’t the surf media just an unruly son of a bitch? A lunch stealing lug?

An ugly bastard?

Yes. The surf media is filled with ugly bastards. With unrepentant bullies and I am looking at you Nick Carroll and also at you Matt Warshaw and don’t think you are escaping my gaze Chris Binns. But really, I love that Former is surf/skate owned and run and the chop and the wobble prove this. it is no conglomerate run thing, no folder in Kering’s file, and they will soar on wings of pure gossamer. On winds of belief and passion!

Go get ’em boys and never let the bastards get you down!

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Student8888
Student8888
9 years ago

Looks like a catalog for Emo Republic.

SharkAttack
SharkAttack
9 years ago

There was definitely a situation where Dane could have almost been granted a restraining order against a certain esteemed surf journalist when he was on the tour.

Neal Kearney
Neal Kearney
9 years ago
Reply to  SharkAttack

sounds like a good story!

Gabriel LeFrancois
Gabriel LeFrancois
9 years ago

They should go all out and try opening a restaurant next.

Gabriel LeFrancois
Gabriel LeFrancois
9 years ago

This reminds of the South Park episode where Eric Cartman, tired of waiting in long lines and people, decides to open “Cartman Land” with his inheritance.

Burnsy
Burnsy
9 years ago

Can we talk about Matt Warshaw for a minute? I don’t hate the guy, seems totally fine. Really honestly have nothing against him personally. But I definitely don’t want to hear from him every time someone does a new move or something else happens in the surf world and get his hot fucking take on it.

Even the quotes inspire violent disinterest in me…
http://beachgrit.com/search…

Could we find another way to utilize his knowledge? I don’t know how,
but I never want to hear about the history of surfing ever again.

Audit In Progress
Audit In Progress
9 years ago
Reply to  Burnsy

It’s not Matt’s fault that he’s an intelligent, witty (and charming?) man in this soup of idiots. Hopefully he’s getting a pittance for those quotes.

Burnsy
Burnsy
9 years ago

That’s what I mean, can’t we utilize his talents for surfing now, not surfing back then? WSL commentator? Head Judge?

janeausten
janeausten
9 years ago
Reply to  Burnsy

”Violent Disinterest”, that’s a better brand name than ”former”.

Mob Barley
Mob Barley
9 years ago

My god did you sprain your wrist on the reach around?? I wouldn’t want to talk to you guys on record either

funky Gibbon
funky Gibbon
9 years ago

Its not my style but I do like the way they have actually produced stuff people can actually wear without it looking like the normal surf garbage. I hope Chas pushed for a line of tiny nut skimming beachgrit shorts to be shoe horned in there somewhere.

slater thenewdonkey
slater thenewdonkey
9 years ago

God, i love beach grit.

Wiggolly's Paddling Style
Wiggolly's Paddling Style
9 years ago

I think it was the moment you mentioned they have a “brand manager” I decided Former will be shit.

Chas Smith
Chas Smith
9 years ago

But he’s a pro-ish surfer too!

Wiggolly's Paddling Style
Wiggolly's Paddling Style
9 years ago
Reply to  Chas Smith

It indicates that the blokes that make the brand desirable eg Dane, Craig and Austyn won’t be working that hard on it.

Burnsy
Burnsy
9 years ago

Thank fuck for that. Stick to what you guys know, shralping!

Dipset
Dipset
9 years ago
Reply to  Chas Smith

who isn’t?

funky Gibbon
funky Gibbon
9 years ago

Imagine how well it would go if it was just Dane and Craig in an office taking calls and selling it.

Ricoimmo
Ricoimmo
9 years ago

Ok but please explain why these clothes are interesting in any way. So basic!

DrunkenAngel
DrunkenAngel
9 years ago
Reply to  Ricoimmo

No glitter. epic fail.


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