Watch: Fiji Scoffs at Your Off-Season!

You know it's empty when Dingo can't find somebody to burn!

What a wonderful thing, that Southern Ocean.

The seaway’s infinite and volatile nature aids the production of sweet, sweet purply fruit. Not plums or grapes because of course it is freezing, but swells! Purple blobs grow leviathan in the southern sea due to brutal Arctic weather patterns and a relatively unobstructed ocean path.

Moving west to east (as most storms do), the Southern Ocean is uninhibited by any major land masses, making it a bona fide swell highway. Waves originating from the S.O. hit six of seven continents, unless of course you’re counting Europe’s colonial appendages, in which case it’s a perfect sweep. Though it’s most active during the Southern Hemi’s winter, this glacial cauldron pumps out legitimate swells all year-round, which is a treat for the Indos, South Aussies, and even Fijians of the world.

Case in point: four of the Mad Hueys recently escaped the Goldy’s waveless purgatory to revel in some South Pac (by way of Southern Ocean) juice. And what place better than Cloudbreak to dust off those thigh-drag cobwebs?

Can you imagine this type of quality at your local? No, right? Now consider that February is Fiji’s “off-season”.

The video shows not only pristine, six-to-ten foot barreling conditions, but also a very empty lineup. Nobody goes to Fiji this time of year because the waves are “small” and there are “bad winds” but try telling that to Dingo Morrison, one slice of the Half-wit twins, and that devilish Southern Ocean!

Aside from the surf, I also appreciate the clues divulged by the B-roll clips. Based on their boat’s appearance and the docking station used, it’s clear the Hueys aren’t staying on Tavi or Namotu. This means they’re either poor or cheap or both, but probably both. And can’t we all connect with that?

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Kennypowersmullet
Kennypowersmullet
9 years ago

Why pay white men owned camps to stay there an surf when you can stay with locals an give money direct to them for accom an boat rides etc..

Michael Ciaramella
Michael Ciaramella
9 years ago

I hear Tavi is so nice that mainlander Fijians vacation there. True story.

wincy
wincy
9 years ago

Arctic weather patterns?

Eddie Haiku
Eddie Haiku
9 years ago
Reply to  wincy

That’s right Wincy. The swell forms in the Arctic Circle before refracting off Michael’s forehead, crossing vast continents, stopping briefly in Vegas before exploding on the reefs of Fiji. Quite a feat.


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