And to bring WSL to Palm Beach, Florida!
If you could get your degree from Harvard or from Kelly Slater which would you choose? Oh sure, Harvard may be more prestigious and you could be all chummy with your natty bros then go get a respected internship, marry a blue blood, get a job in her father’s company, play tennis on the weekends, have kids, cheat with the nanny, get divorced, get hooked on pain pills, etc.
OR you could get your degree in BACKSIDE TOOB NO RAIL GRAB and be the envy of your beach.
The decision is more difficult than it seems no?
Kelly Slater’s backside toob no rail grab program will apparently be on offer at his new proposed Wave Ranch in Palm Beach, Florida. And let us read from Palm Beach’s local Sun-Sentinal:
More details are emerging on Surf Ranch Florida, a man-made surfing lake in Palm Beach County endorsed by surfing champion Kelly Slater.
County commissioners on Thursday unanimously approved plans for the county to evaluate the proposed surf school and make recommendations for approval later this summer.
During a presentation to the county, representatives of Surf Ranch Florida revealed the project would:
-offer an athletic training center for competitive surfers, a community surfing school, programs for underprivileged youth and a learning center.
-bring in an estimated 83,000 guests annually, and create hundreds of jobs.
-lure thousands of spectators for surfing competitions presented by the World Surf League, a governing body for professional surfers.
And there you have it. A surf school, a training center for underprivileged youth and bleachers to seat a mob starving for professional surfing. Rick Kane is fast becoming a reality. So is the idea of another Bud Tour.
Just going on average priced entertainment in Palm Beach it’s going to be expensive to play at the pool. Thanks! Although, there is a healthy market of Milfs that are bored out of their minds. Perhaps a sugar mama can pay said expensive tuition.
KS: Why do you want to come here son?
Me: (through tears). I’ve got nowhere else to go.
Somebody tell Kelly tge 90s are over please. The momentum generation has lost momentum.
https://youtu.be/5rYXcmVSeBU
What’s the relationship between momentum and inertia?
Oooooh clever
I see what you did there, nice…
Shit. The default rate on student loans for surfers is going to destroy the economy. We’re fucked.
Kelly is retiring this year because the WSL is using his tech next year. KS surfing (winning?) a contest at a wave that he spawned is a little too much of a conflict of interest, even by pro surfing standards.
Naa, as mentioned recently Rick Kane could beat Kelly in his wave pool after 2 hours practice. All Kelly does is go straight
Harvard.
Now the real question: BACKSIDE TOOB NO RAIL GRAB Surf Ranch Florida or Instituto Gabriel Medina?
Palm Beach or São Sebastião?
Well? Which one?
I guess I’m just horny. I keep thinking of my extremely pleasant adventures through Latin America, and then I think of Florida and see Mariano Landa paying for a rimjob from a Confederate biker chick. Not that I have anything against confederate biker chicks, mind.
But perhaps Kelly’s will be all internet trolling fun whereas at the Instituto it’s all cry and shave? Please advise!
Hey Chas,
What’s with the Wsl cutting the big wave tour in half this year? Down to 3 events (at least 3 likely to run events).
11 time world champ or 1 time world champ?
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
Bud Tour…ahhh the good old days! So cool to be able to watch the comps on TV back then. My buddy taped most of ’em and every once in awhile we pop one in the VHS.
Take a good hard look in the mirror, son. A reeeeeaaaaalllllll hard look. See what you have become? An old man who still has a vhs player and watches re-runs of the bud tour held in sloppy knee high usa waves.
I’ll wait here with the bottle-o-poison ’til you get back.
Ps. I cannot promise any will be left, so scoot.
Pps. Actually KS could do with looking in the mirror … his peter pan syndrome is full blown dementia now
Wait, you mean I shouldn’t scour the youtubes for Bud Tour Pismo Beach ’92?
https://www.youtube.com/wat…
Haha. It’s pitiful, I know. I removed all the mirrors in my house for said reason. However, as Nug shows with his Youtube comment, the Bud Tour did sparkle at times. Commentating sounds about like what we get today; except P.T. sounds like a coked out, nose-pinching Ronnie Blakey It’s sad to say that not much has changed performance-wise either. What’s your poison of choice D.A.?
too many to single out. that is a dilemma.
Guinness and Jameson/Cooley is a go to pairing. Bán Poitín is also a lure. nothing fancy.
Best poitin is out of a mason jar.
The glory days…
https://youtu.be/zGbWrbn2BmI
who the fuck is this australian screaming? fire turdpel and get this crazy son of a bitch in the booth now
I think the rolls of fat around his neck inhibit such enthusiasm these days … sleep apnea, here we come.. live like Sion, die like Iz
Live
Like
Michael
Its Peter Townend – yep fucking get him in the booth. BUT he is coaching China!!! imagine him screaming at his Chinese proteges be fucking hilarious
these poor chinese kids… pete blue in the face screaming at these kids to take 4 to the shore
Wow, it’s like these guys wrote the script on surf commentating. And nobody has bothered to update it apart from no longer surfing the green wall.
Gotta love Chris Brown!