Old man Slater has one last trick up his sleeve!
It’s true! Slater-brand OuterKnown has just signed a three-year deal with the WSL to become naming sponsor of the Fiji Pro. The OuterKnown Fiji Pro! Oh, and there are so many angles to this revelation…
The first thing that struck me about this announcement was… where’s the money coming from? Rumor has it events take 3-5 mil to run on average, but Fiji is an outlier. Because there are no real spectators, the WSL doesn’t have to build an infrastructure, which will certainly cut costs.
Still, let’s assume it costs a mil to sponsor this event. How many $80 beanies is Kelly selling to cover that kind of spread? Math says 12,500, but I’m not buying it. I guess this is a (highly questionable) long-term investment on their end, or…..
You know I can’t resist a jab at the King! Here’s the highly unlikely, somewhat comical theory behind this move: frustrated by his early-2017 performance, Kelly is looking for something, anything to get him back in contention. With his odds slim in Brazil, Kelly knows his only chance is to blitz the mid-season holy trinity — Fiji, Jbay, Chopes — and finish strong on the backend.
Sure Kelly’s capable in his own right, but a little pocket-greasing never hurt! With the WSL on Kelly’s side (thanks to a healthy donation from his company), Slater will get the nod on all of those Medina-at-Snapper close call situations. A win at Fiji will put him right back in the race, and the WSL will triple-down on the Slater v. John screenplay. Everyone wins!
Also, should he leave the tour after 2017, Kelly’s guaranteed a wildcard into the Fiji event for the next two years. Right?
Signing three-year deals is not a bad sign for the WSL’s future. It sure as hell doesn’t guarantee anything, but it’s a step in the right direction. Despite losing their title sponsor for 2017, the WSL now has a major backer for every event, which has gotta help keep the lights on. Long live Speaker’s inbred spawn!
Is the WSL sexist? I like to think no but time and time again they prove me wrong. Of course they can always tie their sexist actions back to economics and they’d be right but still sexist.
And how have they plagued the women this time? With a seriously abbreviated waiting period! While the men get a savory 13-day window, the women are forced into a corner with just six. Granted it takes only two days to finish the women’s event and (I think) four for the men but still! I feel your pain Coco, Laura, and Silvana.
Bula vinaka OuterKnown!