Are you on your couch right now waving a flag?
The World Surfing Games, held by the International Surfing Association, are currently underway in Biarritz, France and you don’t care. But let’s turn to our very own DrunkenAngel for further analysis.
we need an article about the isa champs. ffs there are fuckers in this comp who cannot even paddle out past the whitewater and surf worse than my 90 year old grandmother during another raging hemorrhoid infection. this is what the world will see for the olympics? there are people sponsored who literally surf worse than chas. wtf? and the crowds. not one. not two. but noone at all on the beach. NOONE. fucking pony wanking championships get more fans watching. this aint the olympic spirit. this is goddamn leftover spermatoza after a shameful wank to 90s porn magazine – yes, print – spirit. i am not a fucking elitest. we all suck. and sucky surfing is fine. but dont go fucking declaring this is somehow elite or even gutter level surfing. if someone manages to do an air reverse they’ll shit their diapers.
Real quick, are you saying I can get sponsored? And also the phrase “we all suck. and sucky surfing is fine. but dont go fucking declaring this is somehow elite or even gutter level surfing.” is inspired.
But lastly, the World Surfing Games got me thinking about surfers, in general, and the idea of nationalism. Is the modern nation-state, Westphalian sovereignty for our purposes, antithetical to our core selfishness?
Like, could you ever be bothered to cheer country over personality? Oh of course we cheer against nationalities from time to time (Brazil) but that is only because many of us are white and deeply fearful of the impeding loss of global domination.
Could you ever, though, proudly wave your country’s flag when it came to surfing? I think America is great (again) and all, I ain’t no self-loather and will always/forever cheer Clifton James Hobgood but…. I don’t know. I just can’t be fucked with the rest of it.
Plus, let’s be honest, only America, Australia and Brazil have enough legitimately good surfers to matter. Three countries in the whole wide world.
But am I wrong? Is nationalism the future of surfing?
(I’m totally not wrong.)