Protest: The culture wars come to surf!

Our way of life is under attack!

Today, fellow surfers, our culture is coming under attack. Our values that have been passed down from generation to generation to us. Our code and our way of life. The lamestream media has criticized our “localism” for years, branding us ruffians and thugs for simply reminding the valley to go home. For smashing cameras, throwing rocks, waxing windshields and yelling loudly but we know that if we don’t make interlopers feel unwelcome then the surf will become dangerously crowded.

We, each of us, are quiet heroes.

But a new brand seeks to challenge our history. Let’s read about “Localish.”

Localish was born out of a desire to foster a sense of belonging in the wonderful, but sometimes-territorial, surf community. Co-founders Jenn Biestman and Greg Coffin believe everyone should feel a sense of belonging wherever they are, whether you’re a native, part-time resident, or visitor passing by. Inspired by this philosophy, Localish Apparel is made with original designs created somewhere between Hawaii and California.

“Surf culture can sometimes come with territorial attitudes. We believe the ‘locals only’ notion is not only prohibitive and unwelcoming, it’s outdated,” said Jenn Biestman. “This attitude certainly isn’t limited to the surfing community, which drove us to create Localish, a brand that is for everyone.”

“To be ‘local’ is truly a state of mind, rather than a point of origin,” added co-founder Greg Coffin. “This is why we are thrilled to bring the Localish philosophy and products to the public. It’s time to change the way we think about what being a ‘local’ means.”

Hell. What are we going to do about this? How are we going to remind everyone they don’t belong?

Should we start a brand?

What should we call it?

Let’s get inspired!

bald head vs long hair - surf fight
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shootsthen
shootsthen
8 years ago

Loacalish: a bunch of rich turds that come to your surf spot and think a smile and a hello should result in an invitation to your house and a spot on the peak that took you your whole life to get. Good lord these guys are clueless idiots.

Ami Lost
Ami Lost
8 years ago

So tired of her ilk. Not because she just started surfing a few years ago but because she has given so little of her time to understand it. Most “locals” act like “locals” when kooks act like kooks. Locals in quotes since it doesn’t always take a local to call out someone acting like a kook. Hi Jenn, spend more time in the water and less time building your brand and you might feel fewer stares as you sweep your way out into the wrong or right lineup. You’ll feel much better about yourself as you gain skill than wasting away life trying bully bullies.

Nick Carroll
Nick Carroll
8 years ago

“To be ‘local’ is truly a state of mind.” what does that even mean.

blumpkin mung
blumpkin mung
8 years ago

We all know that only Hawaiians (or those that choose to present as Hawaiian) can really be ‘localish’ wherever they go. Philosophies differ in that Hawaiian ‘localish’ means that every spot is their spot, not that ever spot is everyone’s spot.

Lemon Next to the Pie
Lemon Next to the Pie
8 years ago

Dammit, my Siberian gulag roots showing through. I’m sure he runs it like a gulag.

Gary Adler
Gary Adler
8 years ago

Localish- you and five of your closest Facebook friends with “Rasta” Costco Chinese cut outs crowd the impact zone with man buns.

SkepticallyOptimistic777
SkepticallyOptimistic777
8 years ago

Being all-inclusive is a great way to murder a brand before it starts. Exclusivity creates scarcity. Artificial scarcity drives the diamond market. It makes people covet and increases the consumers perception of value. Legitimate scarcity creates CIA propagated coos in the resource rife 3rd world(see Immortal Techniques 3rd World)…well I guess artificial does too.

Ocean waves are a legitimate scarcity in heavily populated areas. Where are the coos? I think the paying off of Hawaiian officials may loosely fall into this category.

There is a quantifiable number of good waves that break at a measurable amount of good surf spots. This means ocean waves fit the description as limited resources.

So if certain God-gifted terrain like Mammoth Mountain and Snowbird are commoditized with a set limit of people allowed everyday,AKA ‘maximum capacity,’ then how come surf spots aren’t monetized in a similar fashion? I’ll tell you why…localism.

Dwindling blue-collar baby boomers who have raised their white-collar children with a passed down ideology. “Capitalize on the system, BUT NEVER subscribe to its sociopathic approach when your own community is at stake.” The North Shore being the perfect example of this. Loving thy neighbor as thyself.

These are egalitarian coastal communities who knowingly or unknowingly are fighting a losing battle. Globalism has the money. And money ALWAYS wins. Yet their vigilance does not go unnoticed nor unappreciated.

And where are these freeloading nomad locals(the founders of this hipster brand) during this necessary resistance? Likely updating ther socialist Vlog, prioritizing their ‘safety needs’ above all else through their meaningless careers, and seeking trends to exploit. Absent of heart, yet desperately trying to imitate it. Unfortunately, they are the majority nowadays…so localism is more relevant than ever. Quite the opposite of their pitch.

Ghostface Braddah
Ghostface Braddah
8 years ago

AMEN.

longtom
longtom
8 years ago

double amen

channelbottom
channelbottom
8 years ago

I’m opening up an international chain of beachside kiosks which will rent handbags for this sort of important surf fracas.

Once the hair pulling, shrieking and “oooh you bitch”ing has passed, we will gather up said handbags to clean and disinfect them, ready for the next customers-at-loggerheads.

resumes.mvlhawaii@gmail.com
8 years ago

Like laird?

shootsthen
shootsthen
8 years ago

You win this award: 2017’s biggest “new kook to Hawaii”

Barney Cools
Barney Cools
8 years ago

if the inertia started a clothing label it would be similar to this

Lightning Bolt Thrower
Lightning Bolt Thrower
8 years ago
Reply to  Barney Cools

First thing I thought. They should put up a kiosk on the cliff at Lunada and sell their clothing. It would be a huge hit.

janeausten
janeausten
8 years ago

They could’ve found a better brand name to flog their tat with.
Localish sounds like they’re out for the a hard core Pennsylvanian fundamentalist market.
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…

turts
turts
8 years ago

I think the bigger question here is simply why do we need another surf brand? I think old mate Greg should have paid more attention in economics class at school.

Paulo De Tarso Duarte
Paulo De Tarso Duarte
8 years ago

Let’s start a club to keep our traditions strong, high and alive!
We gonna wear black trunks and we call our club: Hui O He’e Nalu
…
…
…
No?

Tostiloco
Tostiloco
8 years ago

Occasional Bad Days. Kinda Core Division. OuterVaguelyFamiliar.

PacificNorthPest
PacificNorthPest
8 years ago
Reply to  Tostiloco

Clever clever clever!

PacificNorthPest
PacificNorthPest
8 years ago

He’s Usually Not Like That Boys Club

PacificNorthPest
PacificNorthPest
8 years ago

Pretty Good Guy Cruz Skateboards

PacificNorthPest
PacificNorthPest
8 years ago

Oh Wait I Think I Know Where We Are Now Surfboards

PacificNorthPest
PacificNorthPest
8 years ago

Billahollowedoutapple

PacificNorthPest
PacificNorthPest
8 years ago

Minivans. Steady as she goes-silver. Just Maui. Suburb and Suburb Hawaii. Wcel. Handjob Wax. DaMeh. Halftecom. Quesy-ey. Poke Magazine.

Help me Jesus I can’t stop!

Tom
Tom
8 years ago

“Where you from bra?” – “Oh i’m localish”!! That’s gonna bring so much peace to the line up

Tom
Tom
8 years ago

“Localish – destined to be low intermediate surfer forever”

longtom
longtom
8 years ago

“We enjoy having a flexible lifestyle by residing in both California and Hawaii. We also love surfing and adventuring all around the globe. During our travel experiences, we have met people and communities that have welcomed us with open arms, and make us feel like one of them.

If you’re familiar with surf culture, you know that it can sometimes come with territorial attitudes. “This is MY surf spot” or “Locals only” or “No standup paddlers allowed” are terms that are commonly expressed. This notion is prohibitive, outdated, and unwelcoming. If we want to get all academic, it’s straight up ethnocentric. The “Locals Only” attitude isn’t limited to just surf culture—it transcends to ideas of religion, sexuality, and nationalism”

Just pick up your fucking rubbish and keep your SUP at the lake if you come to Lennox. And bring beers to the Point if you are going to hog spots in your fucking Winnebago.

Dogsnuts
Dogsnuts
8 years ago
Reply to  longtom

Localish: gets shitty scraps on the inside all day and fucks everyone’s line when every set rolls through.

Lemon Next to the Pie
Lemon Next to the Pie
8 years ago
Reply to  Dogsnuts

You surf Tea-Tree often then?

Dogsnuts
Dogsnuts
8 years ago

Ahhh the Victorian equivalent perhaps. Surf forecasts bring an influx of total fuckwits that will not move or duckdive two feet of whitewash turning the whole thing into a slalom run of arrogant noobs.

Lemon Next to the Pie
Lemon Next to the Pie
8 years ago
Reply to  Dogsnuts

I’m still laughing at the “swell of the century”. Gary Elkerton was all over tv/radio talking up Noosa as being the only place that could handle it. Carpark and streets were full at 2 hours before dawn. Waves were good, but not any better than an average cyclone swell, crowds were insane.

He surfed a spot down his way with a few mates….

Dogsnuts
Dogsnuts
8 years ago

Haha, smart bloke. Read his book? It’s great.

Sonny Joyce
Sonny Joyce
8 years ago

Wow. Still laughing. You posted this same storey some months back. Scraping the barrel there colonel.

Lemon Next to the Pie
Lemon Next to the Pie
8 years ago
Reply to  Sonny Joyce

Well it was pretty fucken funny then and maybe I just smirk a little thinking about it.

Sonny Joyce
Sonny Joyce
8 years ago

Guess he hit it wit ZZRASTA…
Mat Smith Saved Kelly’s life in Timor. LLTK’s.

longtom
longtom
8 years ago

Why does every new business need a philosophy?
Can’t they just try and sell shit and shut the fuck up?

The MHL Buoy
The MHL Buoy
8 years ago
Reply to  longtom

Even this website has a manifesto so there must be something in it. No direction and no image is almost certainly a path to failure. Shit direction and image ain’t too far behind though.

longtom
longtom
8 years ago
Reply to  The MHL Buoy

Does this work as a manifesto?

“You do a commercial – you’re off the artistic roll call, forever. End of story. … Everything you say is suspect and every word that comes out of your mouth is now like a turd falling into my drink.”
Bill Hicks.

Barney Cools
Barney Cools
8 years ago
Reply to  longtom

pretty fucken hard to survive soley as an artist without commercial income stream to offset the creative freedom of artistic projects. is in my world anyway.

Lemon Next to the Pie
Lemon Next to the Pie
8 years ago
Reply to  Barney Cools

Yep. You know that kid down the back of the classroom?
“You’ll never get anywhere with those scribbles”.
Well he now runs an artist collective space in a beachfront metropolis with which he generates income through a ‘never say no’ policy to paying jobs to allow 3 days work a week and 2 days to do what he wants in the studio. He does surf, music, tourist, commercial design, whatever the client wants. That pays the rent/mortgage on a flat one street back from the beach, puts food on the table, etc. He surfs every day. Happy as Larry.

ricmatic
ricmatic
8 years ago
Reply to  Barney Cools

Really good point

The MHL Buoy
The MHL Buoy
8 years ago
Reply to  longtom

So Catch 22 then. Localish doesn’t appear to be too artistically inclined so they couldn’t really get barred in the first place could they?

Lemon Next to the Pie
Lemon Next to the Pie
8 years ago
Reply to  The MHL Buoy

Can’t get barred. Can’t get barrelled.

SkepticallyOptimistic777
SkepticallyOptimistic777
8 years ago
Reply to  longtom

Don’t you mean “-Alex Jones”

Bleach'd Git
Bleach'd Git
8 years ago
Reply to  longtom

That sounds like a great philosophy longtom.

Klein Zack
Klein Zack
8 years ago
Reply to  longtom

‘cuz u can’t be everything to everybody…

ricmatic
ricmatic
8 years ago

“Gohomekookish

Regional colloquialism
Regional colloquialism
8 years ago

Beige is my favorite color


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