Uniting mankind!
I will admit to you here and now that I’ve always been jealous of skateboarders and their adversarial relationship with law enforcement. There they are, on the streets, trying to poach this or that set of stairs, needing to always keep one eye out for little pieces of gravel and the other out for the fuzz. Oh it is such beautiful enmity. The skateboarder thin and scabbed. The cop chubby and authoritative. The seething distrust that pours from each their eyes when they spot each other.
Surfers don’t have this natural enemy and, untethered, drift easily into the dangerous esoteric spaces, imagining that surfing is somehow spiritual and/or decent. Hell, surfers and the law are apparently so tight that Redondo Beach’s police department is putting on a surf contest during the same weekend as Founders Cup. And let us turn to the local newspaper to learn more.
Coming off a successful skateboard contest in October, the department is planning its next community-focused event, this time a team surf contest titled “The Line Up.”
“We’re trying to reach people who we normally wouldn’t reach,” said Dinah Lary, community services program manager for the RBPD. “Usually when you have an experience with a police officer, it’s not your best day. It’s usually because you’re the victim of a crime or something is going bad, so we’re trying to have your experience be positive and do things that are more fun.”
The contest is designed for all ages and skill levels in partnership with the Special Olympics of Southern California, Wounded Heroes of America and the Redondo Beach Police Foundation. While the event is free to compete, donations are encouraged to any of three charities.
The contest itself will involve teams of up to six members that can either be pre-arranged or sorted out at the event. Each team will also include either a Special Olympic athlete, military veteran or police officer, many of whom do not have much experience surfing, Lary said.
“They are going to have to work together as a team to help that person catch their waves,” Lary said. “It’s really about the experience and having a good time.”
The winner of the event will be presented with a Golden Donut trophy, a tongue-in-cheek reference to a police officer’s favorite treat.
“We do have a sense of humor,” Lary joked.
So what’s next for the department that’s getting cooler by the day? Lary said there is no shortage of ideas. The only slow-up is organizing them and getting them funded.
To be honest, it sounds very nice. It sounds like a wonderful celebration of the brotherhood of mankind. Like the perfect balm to soothe our irritated times. Maybe surfing really is spiritual and/or decent.
Wiggolly’s Paddling Style? Is it?
This is National Geographic level insight. Hats off sir.
As long as they don’t shoot my “peers”, I’m okay with it.
Dear Longtom,
By my calculations you got let off at least three reports. How about some makeups…?
Story ideas – Gabs and Italo are the new Gary Green and Bryce Ellis?
gods plan
I have 3 first names. – redneck if it wasn’t 3 different languages – – fun to watch police profiling and air marshalls squirm next to me
I have no idea what this means.
Not even. – One?
Key word there is Olympics, now surfing is apart of the sporting Mecca money is gonna flow from all sorts of weird places
A Surfer’s natural enemy must surely be other surfers, oh and Sophie “the canceller” Goldschmidt #neverforgive
What has Mikey Wright done to the youth of America? Faark! That haircut is a licentious vice!
My first thoughts exactly:
“Fuck me that hair cut should be an arrestable offence for a start!”.
…am I turning into my parents parents generation?
Where has my punk-rock gone?
It wasn’t Mikey?
What worked for one man to gain confidence in himself to send it and fly, does not work for all. Would Surf Ranch and Kelly’s Michelob low cal ultra controlled environment render Mikey’s mullet powerless? I fear yes. But then i think: A wind machine, Surf Ranch and that mullet would be sweet. Shit! Ya know what else. RED digital cinema to quantify a measurable mullet lift/drag.
Like Martin Potter did in the ‘90s, Mikey will eventually tame that pelt and settle into mediocrity and cliche. And while we’re talking Mikey, why hasn’t something been written about Jesse Mendes whacking him three times with his board in the carpark? Huh? Fucking huh? Chas? Derek?
If the cops leave our beaches alone, we’ll leave their doughnuts alone. Promise!
‘“We do have a sense of humor,” Lary joked.’
I still don’t know if that was a typo or if the writer was really that clever with their passive aggressiveness.
I once spent two days head judging a Cops only surf contest…
Told a cop afew weeks later that “they” owed me a favour and got myself out of a speeding ticket.
a long, long time ago, I finger blasted a bird behind the community hall where the local police were holding a blue light disco to try and befriend the local youths. does that mean I owe them one?
Yes, maybe go clean the local Constables house windows at midnight.
You’re going to have a very hard time convincing me to put down the fireplace poker when you come to Hell, Neggyboy. You extorted that little piggy.
Sounds like a rock off between Tenacious Negs and Satan.
https://youtu.be/KLr8gnYpVsg
Mmmmm, so counter-cultural!
“Coming off a successful skateboard contest in October, the department is planning its next community-focused event, this time a team surf contest titled ‘The Line Up.'”
Apparently the police are tight with skateboarders too. Also, are they going to use Gerr’s “The Game” format? If so, well, uh… congrats, Bradley, I guess. Vindication through small victories…
No, it sounds like they’re going to use the WSL North Point format where hardly anyone will actually catch a wave…
Fucken skaters sold out man.
Assuming Satan sleeps, Wiggolly’s Paddling Style will be asleep for 4 more hours . In the mean time how can we find out if the Lunada Bay boys are signed up for this?
Let’s ask Rory Parker!
oh man, tell me Rory’s from Palos Verdes. That’d be a beautiful bit of gossip.
I think he may be OC originally. He sure do like to write about those Bay Boys though…
It takes a while for the Versed to wear off
Requiring drugs to sleep sounds like a living hell, how fitting!