Help: I was shamed by a 7x Irish longboard champ!

There is no excuse for bad behavior. And drugs are bad.

Can I admit something to you? These days find me not being my best self. I don’t really know why, to tell you the truth. Maybe I frayed my amygdala by writing surf for a few too many years. Maybe age and alcohol are catching up with me. You’ve seen scans of those booze-soaked brains, no? All black marks and holes etc.? Whatever the case, there is really no excuse, I snap or get all huffy without even being truly provoked.

Like two days ago there I was on Instagram, scrolling around after posting yet another bit of bald-faced promotion for my book Cocaine + Surfing (buy here in America!) (Here in Australia!).

Instagram can be a wonderful tool for this kind of thing but, of course, promotion is sniffed out and disliked by a good number of people because it is annoying. So anyhow, there I was scrolling around into some comments on the bit of promotion (a video of a man playing with his nose) and stumbled across a note from someone frustrated with my glorification of cocaine because I was setting a bad example for the minors following my account.

His profile describes him as a surfer, writer, traveller, ex 7 x longboard champ, LGBT, creator of Humans of Surfing and he made a very good point. Cocaine is not good for you and children should not be tricked in to sampling.

I should have just apologized and was clearly holding an untenable position but got huffy instead and responded, “Unfollow, bro!” or something equally lame.

He went on and on and on in comment after comment after comment telling me that he knows people who know me and they have informed him that I’ve never done any cocaine and just participate in bad behavior only to get attention. That this sort of thing is my modus operandi. He was mostly right except for the never having done cocaine bit and, again, I should have admitted this and apologized but laughed at him for being a 7x Irish longboarding champ instead.

Then he went and deleted all his comments which, in turn, deleted all mine which made me very sad and only haunted by the people he knows who know me. The people who have informed him that I am a rude fraud.

How many longboarders do I know? How many longboarders know me?

It is definitely time for an apology tour.

The Jerk (10/10) Movie CLIP - That's All I Need! (1979) HD
0 0 votes
Article Rating
Subscribe
Notify of
guest
51 Comments
Newest
Oldest Most Voted
Keener Kola
Keener Kola
8 years ago

@ me next time

Keener Kola
Keener Kola
8 years ago

Instagram resumes: solid “Nah”

Mr. Potz’s Opus
Mr. Potz’s Opus
8 years ago
Wowen Ilson
Wowen Ilson
8 years ago

What is it with you and longboarders? You’re just a fellow noserider, you should get along fine. https://uploads.disquscdn.c…

Miki Dora
Miki Dora
8 years ago

How many “I’s” in that “story” Chaz?

channelbottom
channelbottom
8 years ago

I see your point but I was thrown off by the bait of the word “you” in your first statement.

It does hold water up to a point with drugs etc. cuz all react a little differently. With jumping off a high building, the difference might not be noticeable enough to make an statistical impact which encourages personal experimentation.

channelbottom
channelbottom
8 years ago

What about jumping off a high building?

I guess previous data sets may not cover all outlying possibilities.

ricmatic
ricmatic
8 years ago

prohibition was the beginning of organized crime. We’re such dumb asses.

turts
turts
8 years ago

I’d like to see a scan of my brain after 30years of surfing

ricmatic
ricmatic
8 years ago

Legalize it all. There are no booze cartels killing 8k people a year.

PacificNorthPest
PacificNorthPest
8 years ago
Reply to  ricmatic

And that’s in a slow year, and just in Mexico. Couldn’t be worse than what we got now, and fucking hell of a lot cheaper, all the enforcement and incarceration …

Captain Clark
Captain Clark
8 years ago

Beach grit has gone soft…tried to post a link to the article written about this gay dude wanting to be the first gay dude in pro surfing and was denied. Peace out police stopped it cold. https://www.carvemag.com/20…
This is it. Around the link police

Antipodes
Antipodes
8 years ago
Reply to  Captain Clark

Nothing wrong with being gay. Riding a longboard on the other hand…..

84092, 92673
84092, 92673
8 years ago
Reply to  Antipodes

Both are shameful, this we know.

channelbottom
channelbottom
8 years ago
Reply to  84092, 92673

Aw come on. It’s 2018. Being homosexual is absolute fine. Don’t be so culturally retarded (in the true sense of ‘retardation’)

But Jebus sez partaking in SUP is a one way ticket to Hell.

PacificNorthPest
PacificNorthPest
8 years ago

yeah there’s some irony for ya.

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
8 years ago

Not forgetting the Opium Wars in China where the British Government and Army stepped in to support British companies right to import opium after the Chinese Government decided to ban the importation of the drug into its realm .So much for the War Against Drugs.

PacificNorthPest
PacificNorthPest
8 years ago

Never had much of a moral stance on coke, and as an ignorant boy drove bricks of it from place to place, all strapped up like a cartoon gangster. But the reality of how ugly the supply chain is made itself apparent very quickly. Ever since I’ve not wanted any part of that evil shit. If you’re doing rails, some little part of the 8k murders a year in Mexico are getting sucked up your nose too. Too bad it doesn’t lend itself to one’s own little backyard patch ….

longtom
longtom
8 years ago

I hope this cocaine + surfing book tour never ends.

Dooma
Dooma
8 years ago

7x Irish longboard champ kinda seems like a false claim same as “Surfings best Impersonator” – Tyler Allen. Just cause you are the only one doing it, doesn’t make you the best, and doesn’t mean you’re any good.

Captain Planet
Captain Planet
8 years ago
Reply to  Dooma

in all fairness, if “you are the only one doing it” you are indeed the best. However, you are also simultaneously the worst. Maybe he is just a “glass is half full” type of guy? But there is an irony within his claim…… Like claiming to be the worlds best legless footballer…… cant imagine the bar is set very high…

PacificNorthPest
PacificNorthPest
8 years ago
Reply to  Dooma

judge for yourself – seems like an interesting enough kid, but I’m not particularly in love with the surfing

https://www.youtube.com/wat…

DrunkenAngel
DrunkenAngel
8 years ago

Surfed Aileens and Rileys

PacificNorthPest
PacificNorthPest
8 years ago
Reply to  DrunkenAngel

Looks fun enough

Dooma
Dooma
8 years ago

On no planet will I watch longboarding except by accident

Lindalovelace
Lindalovelace
8 years ago
Reply to  Dooma

Ohh touchy point thats like saying the early pros of the 1970s were only champs because there infact was only a handful of them , snicker snicker take that on the chin Nat.

Dooma
Dooma
8 years ago
Reply to  Lindalovelace

There was still at least more than one of them, And they were pretty good given the equipment.

Jimmy the Saint
Jimmy the Saint
8 years ago

Don’t forget that he is a contributor to “the inertia” also!

Captain Clark
Captain Clark
8 years ago

https://www.carvemag.com/20…

Kung pow, the power of the interwebs.

Black Rubber
Black Rubber
8 years ago

No doubt one of the all-time great Irish sportsmen! 98% chance his longboard had 3 fins and a leash plug.

ricmatic
ricmatic
8 years ago

The real victim here is cocaine. Surfing is just as bad as coke.

f u
f u
8 years ago
Reply to  ricmatic

surfing ruined my chances of having a “normal” life

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
8 years ago
Reply to  f u

Lucky Bugger .

ricmatic
ricmatic
8 years ago
Reply to  f u

Hi everyone, My name is Ricmatic and I’m an addict.

Keener Kola
Keener Kola
8 years ago
Reply to  ricmatic

The career heads cut it with skateboarding

f u
f u
8 years ago

do kids read books these days?


51
0
Would love your thoughts, please comment.x
()
x