Breaking: “World-class” surf resort planned for Palm Springs!

Not a Surf Ranch!

Did I write yesterday that I was bored of wave pools and wave pool accessories? It must have been the damned third wave coffee punching those keys (there is no other kind in Portland, Oregon apparently) because oooee! I’m a man reborn. For it was revealed today that one of my favorite places on earth (Palm Springs, CA) is set to break ground on a “world-class” surf resort. You read that right. Palm Springs, California. In the desert far away from the Pacific. Very near to Coachella.

Now, Palm Springs has, for the past three decades, been known as a retirement community. A place older folk go to get the cold out of their bones. Hipsters and fabulous gay men have taken a shine to it lately but there are still many aged and I would imagine these sorts of conversations plague Bingo night:

Trouble, oh we got trouble,
Right here in Palm Springs!
With a capital “T”
That rhymes with “P”
And that stands for Pool,
That stands for pool.
We’ve surely got trouble!
Right here in Palm Springs,
Right here!
Gotta figger out a way
To keep the young ones moral after school!
Trouble, trouble, trouble, trouble, trouble…

But a pool is nothing to fear, these days. Surfing ain’t like what it used to be three decades ago. It is a sport now and wholesome.

But let’s turn to the local Desert Sun for more:

Plans for the proposed 14.6-acre resort, on a vacant parcel southwest of the clubhouse and parking lot, call for a two- to three-story, four-star level, 270-room hotel; 45 villas, two to four bedrooms and ranging 1,500 to 2,500 square feet; a 5.5-acre surfing lagoon.

Amenities include a spa, several swimming pools, a volleyball court, pickleball courts, restaurants as well as other food and beverage options around the resort and lagoon, said Doug Sheres, a partner in Desert Wave Ventures LLC.

Desert Willow would be the first development of this type for the group, he said, but one of the partners has consulted and worked on various aspects of other surf lagoon projects and manmade wave technologies.

The surf resort is intended to appeal to customers looking for a vacation experience, Sheres said.

“Our guests are multi-generational and committed to a healthy and active lifestyle,” he said. “In today’s world, it’s more important than ever to compel people to take a break from the digital world and share quality time with their family and friends.”

The lagoon, he said, will combine advanced and challenging waves for expert surfers but also provide an area for beginners. It will be open to resort guests and the public.

The lagoon will use Wavegarden technology – a leading surf lagoon engineering company based in northern Spain.

Wavegarden, eh? In the four way race for supremacy ‘tween Wavegarden, American Wave Machines (Waco). Surf Ranch and Webber doesn’t it seem like Wavegarden and American Wave Machines are pulling away from the pack? Or is it still too early to pick a winner?

Maybe we should wait for Webber.

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Dogsnuts
Dogsnuts
8 years ago

Exactly, that is what’s at stake, Brant Bjork forever!

Red
Red
8 years ago

Alos Occy’s one yeah?

channelbottom
channelbottom
8 years ago

More pools = Fewer people in the ocean.

I’m just going to keep telling myself that.

Dogsnuts
Dogsnuts
8 years ago

I’ll fucking kill someone if so cal punk starts coming out of Palm Springs.

surfmom
surfmom
8 years ago

Pretentiously themed party at an overpriced venue full of people with overinflated senses of self on shit drugs advertised on a flyer featuring two Ken doll fuckwits with photoshopped nipples and sweat. Festival flyer graphics are like visual dubstep. Excuse me while I pour bleach in my eyes.

Audit In Progress
Audit In Progress
8 years ago

I was unironically, honestly excited about this – until I read it was a Wavegarden. The wave pool from Waco with a proximity to Palm Springs actually sounds incredibly fun.

Ghostface Braddah
Ghostface Braddah
8 years ago

Same. Palm Springs has amazing restaurants and bars. Disappointed that it’s a Wave Garden.

Chas Smith
Chas Smith
8 years ago

I hear you!

Audit In Progress
Audit In Progress
8 years ago
Reply to  Chas Smith

Let’s go and drink cocktails and surf it in too-short shorts! Make the best of it!

Dooma
Dooma
8 years ago

Patience yeah yeah just a little patience.

Old Kook
Old Kook
8 years ago

What the fuck is Pickleball?? Is that what the poster is from?

Otto
Otto
8 years ago
Reply to  Old Kook

It’s sort of like tennis which makes it basically surfing. Pickleball is surfing.

Bushman
Bushman
8 years ago

That image/poster made me vomit!

velobwoy
velobwoy
8 years ago
Reply to  Bushman

Cuz you weren’t there?

Snowbored
Snowbored
8 years ago
Reply to  Bushman

Is that you on the right?
Or the left?
I bet you gagged first!

channelbottom
channelbottom
8 years ago
Reply to  Bushman

Don’t worry Bushy. I have the distinct feeling those chaps wouldn’t be interested in touching you.

david fffff
david fffff
8 years ago

Nothing should exist in Palm Springs.

StarJamma
StarJamma
8 years ago
Reply to  david fffff

Except broken dreams, writer’s block and hot gay sex.

Phat-wan kerr
Phat-wan kerr
8 years ago
Reply to  StarJamma

do I need to qualify in all 3 areas?

The Bitchy Crab
The Bitchy Crab
8 years ago
Reply to  StarJamma

Did I mention somewhere that Chas and I took a writing escape to Palm Springs together? I was writing a book about an Australian prime minister and Chas, I think, was early days of Coke and Surf. We would wake early, take coffee and avocado toast by the pool, and flash dance on our keyboards. Of the three options above, I believe two were fulfilled.

Hippy
Hippy
8 years ago

I once typed a piece about a rainbow writers conference set in Palm Springs, Chas was a speaking guest in my story.

As for PS, it’s always been overtly wealthy gays that built that town. Hollywood gays at that and rat packers that I worked for. The grey hairs settled in PD and beyond.

StarJamma
StarJamma
8 years ago

BTW, wtf is going on in Australian government? I don’t really understand all the tumult.

Dogsnuts
Dogsnuts
8 years ago
Reply to  StarJamma

Right wing fuckwits in charge but not really doing anything, same as America.

Phat-wan kerr
Phat-wan kerr
8 years ago

back when it was possible to remember who the PM was?


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