Jeffrey's Bay shredder turned longboarding nymphet wins world title in Taiwan, reveals sexy secret…
Yesterday, the Jeffrey’s Bay shredder and occasional WCT wildcard Steve Sawyer won the 2018 WSL World Longboard Championship at the Taiwan Open of Surfing.
His ability to metamorphosise from six-o performance to logging brings a needed respectability to the longboarding tour, I think.
Sawyer, who is twenty four and anything but a brute, is also a lovely and clever and funny and popular man who, one would imagine, is currently thrusting himself up to the hilt into an engaged fan.
(Actually, no, Christian etc.)
From the presser:
His combination of traditional longboarding manoeuvres with speed, power and flow was impeccable, and he needed it all to overcome Sallas in the Final to best his runner-up finish at the 2016 World Championship. Sawyer had a massive crowd supporting him on the beach who erupted every time he caught a wave, making the atmosphere electric.
His fans, one might imagine, were won earlier in the event when Sawyer gave a revealing post-heat interview.
“I need to call (the American) Kevin Skvarna out,” said Sawyer. “This morning he gave me a power juice while I was driving in the car. It was still dark and I had two coffees. I said I needed water and he cracked this bottle. I took a sip and…mmmm… flavoured water. I said, what is this, and it was Kevin’s pee bottle.
“So I had two gulps of it.”
Cue half-crazy, enchanted laughter.
Watch here! (Comes in towards the end.)
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hmm, im thirsty…
Also worked a treat for Moraji Desai , India’s 5th Prime Minister who was a long time practitioner and advocate of urine therapy and Madonna who peed on her feet in attempt to cure athlete’s foot. ( Also works on marine stings ? and has been used as an antiseptic in former times ).
Mellow yellow
If you think your usual energy drinks taste bad, URINE for a surprise!!!!
(insert hokey yuk-yuk laughter track)
Epic road story..
What taking the piss
Looks like when a surfer
Starts drinking the piss
If your description is accurate I would say perhaps more likely he is the sheath than the weapon.
Why are you such a miserable cunt?
I see no misery here, Mr Choado. Just reading between the lines!
Kevin must be from Cape Town… no water down here so one must make do.
CT Tourism has missed a solid marketing opportunity over the past 18 months: “Cape Town: the number 1 global destination for indulging your golden shower fetish!”
It’s funner than you think!
#goldenshower.
Sounds like you enjoy it. I’ve never tried it, but thought about it. Closest I ever got was when I peed on my girlfriends butt when we were showering together, until she started freaking out and squealing. But I kept going until I was finished. But at least I can now say I have given a girl a golden shower.
Check that off the list.
I love this parallel universe of surfing where the blokes don’t take it too seriously, the chicks are smoking hot and the WSL have given Bierke the mic for some post heat interviews.
And instead of ‘Purps’ it’s ‘Yells’.
… from the tap?