Cute and culturally appropriate for all your Middle Eastern surf adventures!
And once again, how wonderful has the 50 year storm been? Brilliantly marketed, brilliantly executed and impossible to turn away from. All those professional surfers in the water at once, a good handful of which look like they’ve never been in an angry ocean. It has been that good and, if for some reason, you found it possible to turn away then here is Longtom for you. Words even louder than the action.
But, real quick, while I was watching yesterday, on the World Surf League website, I saw a strange advertisement pop up. Eyes peering at me from the bottom of a surfboard and smaller eyes also peering at me from the bottom of two legs.
At first I thought the WSL was pranking me with some sophisticated geo-tagging. As you know, I’m busy on a book about the Middle East and in the Middle East men, who would get in trouble for having stickers of curvaceous babes on the backs of their taxis, put two doe-like women’s eyes instead. It’s all very classy and I wondered if the WSL was letting me know that they know where my head’s at.
I was so fascinated that I clicked and… voila! Even better than sexless sexiness, I was ushered into the world of Shark Eyes or…
The Waterman’s Visual Shark Deterrent
Shark Eyes is the world’s most affordable visual shark deterrent. From watermen to professionals to every day ocean lovers, Shark Eyes is for all water users who want to minimize their risk of a shark attack.
The Shark Eyes decal applies easily to water sports equipment and aims to trick the shark into thinking it’s been spotted, thereby removing the element of surprise and deterring an attack. Stay safer with Shark Eyes, which easily applies to water sports equipment, needs no recharging, doesn’t alter performance, and respects the environment.
I think Shark Eyes, combined with our new pet Killer Whales and delivery vessel, means the day and age of shark on surfer violence is officially over.
Who knew that sharks were so sensitive to prying eye stickers?
Did you?
There was an Aussie shaper based in Bali (maybe it was Jim Banks?) who used to put two eyes on all his boards, specifically to scare away sharks. Or was it Murray Bourton from Pipedream? If I think long enough i’ll remember.
Is that rob machado?
Gene Wilder?
Doesn’t work for Magpies.
Save your money.
If it stops seaweed
Mimicking shark dorsal fins
I will quiver up!
That surfboard has Bette Davis eyes!
pretty sure joel Tudor has done this already but his had 3 eyes and a smile.
Great White: “Stop staring at me!”
Shark Eyes: *silence*
Great White: ” WTF!!! Why you mad doggin’ me yo?!”
Shark Eyes: *silence*
Great White: “You wanna go? Do you?!?!? Come on punk! Bring it!”
Shark Eyes: *silence*
Great White: “Last warning motherfucker!”
Shark Eyes: *silence*
Great White: “That’s it. Get fucked!” *CHOMP*
Big brother is watching
Sharks like the poontang too.
some days more than others according to laird.